FUNNY THINGS THAT KIDS SAY.......(or is it just my kids...?)

[Nikki74]

Hi All,
I'm really new to mumsnet - I've got 3 children and have only just stumbled across it - I've obviously been missing out!!
Anyway, I just thought I would share this with you :- yesterday my 7 yr old daughter came home from school and told me that they had to draw a picture of Henry ville. 'Henry Ville??' I asked - 'I've never heard of him'. 'Well' she said, 'He's a very famous person in history'. I thought for a moment and suddenly it clicked 'Do you mean Henry VIII?'
It turned out to be Henry VIII after all, but she'd obviously read the roman numerals as 'vill' - bless her! It was so funny!

Also, a my eldest daughter (who was 3 at the time) was playing on our front lawn with next doors 3yr old son whilst I was pruning the rosebush (ok....yanking out a few weeds). There was a bit of a heated discussion going on which basically consisted of my daughter saying 'I DO' and next doors son shouting back 'NO YOU DON'T'. After a few minutes my daughter stomped over to me and said 'Mummy, Dean says that girls don't have willies, but they do cos I've got a red pair' - Needless to say - she was referring to her new, shiny WELLIES!!!!

Anyone elses children come out with any amusing little jems?

Bye for now,
Nikki
x

My ds(5) is a Kaiser Chiefs fan - especially "I predict a radish"!

When I told dt1(3) she was too heavy for me to carry she said,"But I'm not heavy,I'm little!". She also said she didn't want to go in the stream because she's not a duck!

my nephew aged about 4 on being asked by my mum (having given him something nice),

"whats the magic word?" thought very carefully for a minute then pronounced triumphantly

"ABRACADABRA!"

when my dd was toilet training we used to clap when she did a wee.once we were in a public toilet and the lady started to wee in next loo and my dd started clapping

another time we were in a public loo and someone farted and my dd shouted "poo STINKER"

dd2 'daddy you've got a funny bum, it like a tail' on seeing dh in the bathroom.

me and dh having a cuddle, dd2 walks in and says 'oh, i want to get married' bless her.

I'm such a wicked mum.....dd3 (7wks) yesterday decided to pull her own hair (she has lots of it) - she had such a tough grip on it and wouldn't let go - i'm desperately trying to prise open her fingers whilst laughing (told you I was wicked ) and she is looking at me as if to say 'Someone's pulling my hair - make it stop'!!!

PMSL at largeginandtonic having to prove that her twin was hers - classic!!

DS's latest is "Oh, for goodness snake!"

Loads of others but I can't remember them at the moment.

DS aged 3 in the bath after quick inspection 'down there' - 'Mummy, I'm an ELEPHANT'.
DD (17 months) regularly toddles out the back garden to chat to the chickens. It's usually along the lines of 'bok bok', but one evening this week we could hear her shouting 'No!' 'Down!' (the two words she hears most often, I'm afraid!). Chickens weren't taking much notice, needless to say.

These have made me laugh and laugh - my dd only 18 weeks so no contributions from her yet I'm afraid, but this thread is really making me look forward to her starting to talk!!

Walking past an elderly lady in the street DS (3 at the time) announced in a very loud voice "Mommy, that lady is very old and she's going to die soon." The lady overheard and gave me a very dirty look!

these are so funny. I remember cooking stewed steak one day and DP's DD asked to look in the pan to see what I was doing and asked "Are them poos in there?"

I also remember one night at bathtime I was getting changed and she spotted my bra and told me how she had a bra-bikini(???) just like it but hers was flat on the front.
I will never forget the day she tried to breast-feed her doll after seeing me b/feed baby sister!!!
After telling me about her planned wedding to a boy from school she wondered if daddy would be a bridesmaid...oh the vision I got!!!!

I too get the "Well done mummy, you did a big poopa" from Dd2 (just turned 2) who's just finished potty training- but today at the zoo a poor monkey got told off for not washing his hands after his poo!!!!

When ds1 was a few weeks we went to visit the ILs, his cousin was about 3 then, adn was watching me change ds' nappy. He was looking at him closely and saying;

'he's got a little nose, and little ears, and litte fingers...and he's got a big willy!'

ds2 (aged almost 6) has been driving us barmy with the slowness of his eating recently. On Sunday after taking 40 mins to eat dinner he explained: ''eating your food too fast can make your arteries full of gunk and you 'll die'' We were taken aback until we realised what he was on about ...eating fast food dear, fast food. Not eating your food fast...
Should I stop the healthy eating lectures do you think?

DD (after overhearing long discussions re need for replacement part on my car)
Mummy, why does you car need a Catholic converter?

These are brilliant!

When I try and pick up DD (3) she squeals, "ooh be careful mummy, you'll squash my big boobies!"

my ds (6) left me a note written in his spidery handwriting last night, asking me to make "flat jack" think he wants flapjack?

Love that wellies/willies one

My ds pointed out and shouted rather loudly that the building over the road was the moron church (mormon)
Another day he told me that his favourite fruit was a submarine (tangerine)

PMSL Curlew, my dh made a similar mistake and he's 35! He thought the song was 'I've got tourettes' for some bizarre reason.

Welcome Nikki74
DS1 (when small) said his foot was sparkeling.....he had pins and needles.

One pancake day we were making pancakes and DH and i were taking it in turns to toss them , mine went the highest and DS1 said mummy your the biggest tosser i know... we now FLIP pancakes
endless otheers including him thinking the song line "anyway the wind blows" was "hit me with a window".

And DS2 has a toy robin red "dress"

Katiesmammy, lol, I've just had a vision as well...

My Dh was telling our DD1 age 4 not to be disobediant and she looked at him and said Daddy i'm not a dizzy bint! i just couldn't stop laughing!!

my DD 2.8 tell me that

you're my best friend in the whole wide world in his hands you are.....

and when she sings to herself without any prompting (ie tv or us), she always sings kumbi ar mylord..

Too much sunday school cds you think???

Larfing like mad at these!

My contribution:

Ds (aged 3) getting a shoulder ride off dp and shouting out "LET GO OF MY BLOODY FOOT". Me and dp shocked till we realised he meant the foot with the plaster on it.....