FUNNY THINGS THAT KIDS SAY.......(or is it just my kids...?)

[Nikki74]

Hi All,
I'm really new to mumsnet - I've got 3 children and have only just stumbled across it - I've obviously been missing out!!
Anyway, I just thought I would share this with you :- yesterday my 7 yr old daughter came home from school and told me that they had to draw a picture of Henry ville. 'Henry Ville??' I asked - 'I've never heard of him'. 'Well' she said, 'He's a very famous person in history'. I thought for a moment and suddenly it clicked 'Do you mean Henry VIII?'
It turned out to be Henry VIII after all, but she'd obviously read the roman numerals as 'vill' - bless her! It was so funny!

Also, a my eldest daughter (who was 3 at the time) was playing on our front lawn with next doors 3yr old son whilst I was pruning the rosebush (ok....yanking out a few weeds). There was a bit of a heated discussion going on which basically consisted of my daughter saying 'I DO' and next doors son shouting back 'NO YOU DON'T'. After a few minutes my daughter stomped over to me and said 'Mummy, Dean says that girls don't have willies, but they do cos I've got a red pair' - Needless to say - she was referring to her new, shiny WELLIES!!!!

Anyone elses children come out with any amusing little jems?

Bye for now,
Nikki
x

Ds2 aged 3 on a foggy day, looking at the misty roadside
"Mammy, wha' happened the cars, the road, the......... Mammmy, wha' happened the TREES?"
Me: "It's OK, ds2 it's just the fog."
Ds2: "But what did the frog DO?"

I have spent hours just reading this thread it's so addictive.

My sister (who is a single mum) dd (5) has been asking her recently, "There is no man in the house how come you had a baby?"

My DS (3y8m) has been calling himself "boy" since he started talking. (I always say good boy to praise him) He starts nursery next week so I have been trying to get him familiar with his name. Everytime I ask him for his name, he shouts "BOY". What am I going to do?

DD1 when she was 4 (now 13) asked me one day why dad has some poo dangling in front of him. Didn't answer that but couldn't stop laughing.

My late mum had to use a wheelchair and I only visited her once a year cos she lived abroad. I asked DD1 when she was 6 will she visit me when I grow old like her grandma. She told me that she'll come round but will not wheel me out because I will embarrass her. Nice! I still remind her what she said.

labradora......wow.....PMSL

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we have a palm tree in a pear tree for some reason!

Used to wear contact lenses a lot a few years ago.

Was getting ds then age 3 ready to go out on a very cold day. I was making sure he had gloves on and everything. At the end of this he turned to me and said
"Mummy make sure you wear your glasses or your eyes will get cold"

Bless....

MerryChipmonkAndAHappyNewey - PMSL can just imagine it!!!!

My DS heard the song ONCE on the radio, and decided a good time to sing it was when we had visitors from church.

"I'm horney! horney, horney, horney!" over & over & over and very loud.

He is 3

Me again... just been watching a cookery programme (ok big cook little cook ) and they mentioned adding garlic.
DS "I like garlics, like on Doctor Who"
hehehehe

This isn't a gutwrencher but it did make me chuckle:
DD1 and friend both drawing castles..
Me to DD's friend: Who is that in the castle?
Friend: A princess. But she doesn't own it.
DD1: Oh, is she just renting it then?

me and dd [age 5]were playing alphabet game yesterday where she has to find things that begin with certain letters..id said p` so she brought me her grandad and said or thankfully whispered "plump" thankfully my dad has a good sense of humour!!!!

My ds was messing about and tripped over and landed on the floor, in between big sobs he was heard to say 'Mammy, I dropped myself!'

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BFing ds the other day and 3yo dd wants help with computer (damn you cbeebies website). I Tell her I'm busy atm so she says 'Lucy (our dog) will take care of him. Has she got boobs with milk in?'

The curate at the school Remeberance Service last Nov asked the children if they knew why the War memorial was there. One of the tinies put her hand up and said, "Because the builders put it there". Bless - nobody could laugh because of the occasion, but it was a funny moment!

my ds has said on occasion that he has "pins and noodles" and came home very concerned over xmas asking if he had been born in a stable

Took my sister and her 3year old shopping. I was standing outside the cubicle while they were in together when I heard
"Mummy is that poo on your knickers? Is it? Is it POO mummy?
My sis "shhh sweetheart use your quiet voice"
My nephew (now screaming) IT IS MUMMY! THERE'S POO ON YOUR KNICKERS MUMMY, IT'S POO! ITS POO!

On emerging from the cubicle red faced an elderly lady came over and offered sis her condolences "nothing's sacred anymore is it darling?"

DD (3yrs) 'mummy I'm trying to hiccup but I can't'
Me (going a bit too sciency...) 'that's because hiccups are involuntary - not like waving your hand which you can do on purpose...'

5 minutes later
DD 'so mummy - if I go to voluntary will there be burps and farts there too...?'

Ok this one made me laugh the other day: ds (nearly 3) poured water all over his trousers, got down from the table and then said 'LOOK at the STATE of my trousers'

My second dd went thru very mummy phase at 4 and one day i had to go out with other 2 dd's and leave her with dh. She wasn't too pleased and said " Why do I have to stay with Willy boy?"

DD was being really annoying with a balloon and I said if she hit me with it again i might pop it. Later on in the day I said 'I'm just going to pop your little brother on the bed' she looked at me aghast and said 'oh no mummy please don't pop him'. Bless