Partner now insists baby names must begin with A after our agreement

[campalotst]

DP name begins with an A, as does his two sibling. His parents did it on purpose and they all have matching tattoos of As in a circle. The parents names start with different letters.

DP has said for quite a few years he would like his child's name beginning with an A.

I wanted to keep my surname and DP wanted me to take his. My babies names are so important to me, I have had a list on my phone for years. So we compromised and I take his as do our kids if I get to pick the babies first names with consideration of his opinions (not a name he hates). He agreed.

Now I've taking his surname he's saying the name I pick must begin with an A.

But I have my lists and not a single one on boys or girls is an A name. How do we resolve this?

Oh yeah. And if you give in on this baby. Obviously all your babies will be As. And then your kids will have to have this fight with him when THEY have babies.

And you'll be the weird A family.

Ok so OP I'm going to skip the discussion of the tattoo and whether he is a bully, as ultimately you seem ok about those issues (though I have questions) and move straight to trying to help you with the name.

Why don't you list your preferences and we can see if we can help.

Sorry OP, but he sounds like a complete idiot.

I just hope you don't end up with a little ABBAkromby or Arsenalia, with their names tattooed on their foreheads.

A name as the middle name to compromise?

Weirdly my husband, his sister and dad were all A names and my son is also an A name. Baby number 2 could end up being an A as one of our favourites is Alice but it's not because of the letter. Me and husbands mam would be the only ones with no A name.

What names are you considering?

In my family all the men had the same first name passed down through the generations. Until my mum said no and called my brother something else. No one died!

You aren't married, so you shouldn't be taking his name and your kids should have your last name. You don't need to take him with you to register the baby and you can't be made to adhere to his choices. I think the person who is pregnant and has to give birth should get final say if agreement cannot be reached.

A name as the middle name to compromise?

He clearly isn't the kind of person who 'does' compromise. His idea of a compromise is to insist on getting half of his way now and then the other half a bit later.

I hate the tattoo, but he's covered in them so it's just another of many,

Mumsnet AI wrote the title and I didn't check it. He doesn't 'insist' he just has a strong preference. So I don't feel the title is fair.

It's just somethign that has been important to him and to me to. So he thinks I can choose any A name I like.