support thread for women who are pregnant or TTC after a termination for abnormalities

[katiecubs]

Hi girls - i hope this becomes a useful area

Numpty, I was just the same - to be fair, think late pregnancy brings insomnia even without stress. I have no solutions, only sympathy!

Shangrila, was I hallucinating when you said DS was 22 pounds? Isnt he less than 4 months? Impressive feeding there - full cream!

Mind you Babycant is in full-on greedy mode at the mo... six weeks tomorrow, can't believe it. Now if just her growing would lead to me shrinking... it should do, given all the milk I'm producing.

Numpty, Mimsy, did you meet? Details please!

Catlady, hope you are OK. Thinking of you.

Morning all, watching the Mr Men (classic series 1 stuff) on youtube this morning. Can't find Mr Strong though which is a nuisance as I'm still trying to persuade DS to eat eggs in some form or other, which is what Mr Strong eats for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Glad I don't share a house with Mr Strong...

Re work, to be fair a lot of it is outwith my employer's control. I've actually been leading a new project rather than doing my official job for the last 18months, so while we could argue the case for my official job to get maternity cover, the new project requires separate funding and the funds we are applying for only take applications twice a year. My colleagues can provide some organisational help but it's having someone to manage volunteers and events that's missing. Hopefully a colleague from another region will be able to provide some distance management, but it's not ideal... At the end of the day it IS my employer's problem, but then I don't want to leave my 18-24yr old volunteers with the uncertainty otherwise the project may struggle, hence trying to do as much as I can. Will be odd going back into my old role and seeing someone else doing the project job (and actually getting the right pay to do it... sigh). Still, there's probably more security even if less pay with my official job; the new project will always be funding-dependent and I'd prefer not to go back to having 1-yr contracts.

Yes, Mimsy and I did meet. Luckily no other mums around at that precise time so it wasn't a case of walking up to a complete stranger and asking if they were Numpty or Mimsy! We had a lovely time watching our boys run around the park (or in my case, watching DS disappear off into the distance, he's a fast runner and a year older than Mimsy's boy). Didn't meet for too long though as DS was being cranky and tired. It was really nice to put a face to a name though! And we both agreed that neither of us looked our age (we both hit 'that' milestone in Feb) - Mimsy, if you're reading, hope you've enjoyed the weather this weekend, was your DH off work at all?

Love to everyone else, great to hear how well the babies are doing, Cant and Shangrila! How are your older children adapting to the change?? Allstars and Katie hope you are both well and not wilting in this heat - it's been OK here. Kittens - how are you, OK after your busy week I hope; and Catlady I hope you are finding the time for TLC this weekend. Littlepoot, Mimsy and all other TTCers, hoping the nice weather is 'helping'!! xxNM

Am eating blueberries and drinking an iced espresso in the garden while DD naps, bliss. DH wasting the sunny weather watching sport . Feeling loads better today, have been to the gym and have a renewed focus to get as fit and healthy as poss over the next couple of months.

Numpty your work situation sound stressful, no wonder it's been keeping you up at night. I remember being in a similar nightmare just before finishing a big contract before I finished work at 37 weeks when PG with DD. I had no-one to hand over to, had recently had to make two of the team redundant but then managed to bring in four new pieces of business and had no-one to do it. Being a conscientious sort, never wanting to leave things half-done or leave people in the poo, it's very hard to let go. But that will happen naturally once you stop work.

Hope you're all having a lovely weekend in the sun. I have burnt myself already xx

Hi everyone. Not been on the laptop lately, been enjoying the warmth! Sat in the sun yesterday and got a bit burnt too! Might go for a longer walk in bluebell wood today when DS gets up. DH is off all this weekend so we have been hanging out.

It was lovely to meet up with Numpty and her gorgeous DS. Numpty, your face looked quite familiar and I am sure we have seen each other around - the West End of Glasgow is a small place! We have exchanged numbers so we can meet up again and I can hopefully help out if needed.

I am glad you are feeling better Crazycat. I am TTC now again too after a MMC at 9 weeks in Feb (surprisingly I also got pregnant the month before that but only made it to 5 weeks with that one). So it's you, me and Littlepoot trying now. I got my period today so it's a fresh start for me this month too.

After I put away a gang of wine tonight!

Catlady, I'm glad you're feeling positive and looking to the future.

All you 'properly' pregnant ladies must be struggling in the heat. I went out today and got very wobbly from the heat. I was having a lovely wander around Brick Lane and then suddenly my legs went to jelly and I started feeling really shakey which wasn't ideal as I had a 20 minute walk to the tube station. This kind of thing does happen to me when it's not hot too but I think the heat exacerbated things somewhat. It's funny, in my previous pregnancies this happened but I usually felt ok after eating something but this time, even if I do eat I still feel really quivery/shaky and weak legged for ages. Is this normal? I was worried I might be hypoglycemic but that doesn't happen 'til later in pregnancy does it?

Numpty, how are you doing? Are you managing to switch off at all, or at least get things wound down at work?

And all you other pregnant ladies? Katie, Allstars, how are you getting on? Who's next after Numpty?

Hello to everyone else. Hope you all had a lovely weekend in the sunshine.

Hello all - yes, feeling a bit hot here, even in Scotland. And it's only 23C in the flat! So not exactly hot. But I think it's sticky weather, at least I feel sticky. It is cooling down again in the evening though, which helps a lot.

Kittens - I'm always lousy at remembering symptoms but I know I'd feel very breathless early on in pregnancy, even when there was no reason to be. With all the hormones racing around there's a lot for your body to be adapting to - and I think I used to feel very faint. So I'm guessing it's normal. Could also be your iron stores, as I think the amount of blood you have is increasing in early pregnancy (not sure though!). I've been a touch anaemic and have really perked up in energy since taking the additional supplement as well as my pregnancy vitamins.

Mimsy - glad to hear you had a nice weekend, even with a not-so-welcome visit by af. Hope the glug of wine went down a treat. Was lovely to meet you last week; it seems strange that our paths could have crossed at playgroup last summer, esp when I was going through our diagnosis with Iola... I wasn't exactly social at that point though.

Crazycat - your first mat leave sounds much more stressful than mine! Hopefully I'll get everything done - must admit, if I don't I'll probably be back in the office next week, but then sometimes I'm amazed I get paid to do what I do - it's a nice job. Apart from the odd stressful moments/politics/daft ways that charities go about doing things sometimes...

Better go, DH wants his computer again (tsk). xx

23 degrees sounds nice and comfortable.

It was blinking roasting in London today, no wonder you were feeling a bit wobbly kittens.

The tube was about a thousand degrees and when I put DD to bed her monitor was reading 29... cooling off a lot this evening though, we've got all the doors and windows open and it's bliss.

Good call re iron, numpty, but also are you eating regularly enough kittens? If your blood sugar is low, and you go for ages between meals, when you eat it's all a bit of a shock to the system. I remember passing out after eating a piece of ginger cake when 7 weeks PG with DD, it was just too much of a rush for my poor body! A low-GI diet and making sure I ate something every 3 hours did the trick. xx

I think I'm eating reasonably regularly but I hadn't thought of the body being shocked by a sudden onset of sugar. That's an interesting point, I shall have to be more conscious of what and when I am eating. Also, I've read that you should keep your protein levels up too so I'll keep an eye on that too.

Hello all. I'm snatching a few minutes before I start to get to grips with preparing dinner but thought I would just send a big hello to you all.

Kittens - I'm sorry you've been struggling in the heat. I think it's so important to keep hydrated in this weather and you can never drink enough water in pregnancy, can you? I think overcast but warm days are particularly problematic so I try to keep a big bottle of cold water with me at all times. What's your blood pressure like? Mine is naturally low and in early pregnancy it would often drop alarmingly. I have been known to faint spectacularly! Do you have a scan date yet? Hi also to Numpty and katie. I do hope you're managing to keep cool. Incredibly difficult in the later stages. I developed a strange love of dark chocolate magnums - a dangerous habit I've sadly yet to kick!

Hello also crazycatlady - how are you doing - both physically and emotionally? I saw your post about the drive to provide a sibling for your DD and remember that feeling myself. But that feeling which was at times such an ache also gave me the hope to forge on when all felt hopeless. Take care.

Waves too to Mimsy and Little Poot. Hope all's well with you both.

And finally, no Can't you weren't imagining it when I said DS was 22+lbs last week. He is absolutely massive. Mind you, he had a head start, as he was 10.5 lbs at birth. He is incredibly long and not particularly chubby, more solid. We are all amazons here, so it would be strange if he were anything else. They all laugh when I take him to the HV clinic to be weighed. Let's not go into the state of my back from carrying him, though! Hope that Little Miss Can't is blooming equally (and Bella and Franklin, if Mishtabel and Lins are around).

Must dash. Take care all. x

Hi Shangrila. Blimey, your back must be wrecked! That's a strapping boy you've got there!

My blood pressure is pretty healthy but verging on the lower side I guess so it's also possible that might be a factor in my 'wobbliness'. I will have a word with the midwife tomorrow (if everything goes as hoped). I have a 7wk scan tomorrow. I'm slightly shitting myself I must admit.

Catlady, I can relate to that almost overwhelming emotional feeling of wanting to provide a brother or sister to your DD. I have a similar feeling at the moment about giving my OH a child. I was watching him running around his mum's garden playing with his 4 year old nephew and it made me feel quite emotional. He is so good with kids and loves being with them so much. I think it would break my heart more to not give him a child than myself if that makes sense. I am very broody too but it's a lot newer a feeling for me than for him. He known he has very much wanted kids for the last 25 years! (We've only been together for 6 of those).

LittlePoot, you are quiet. Are you ok?

Katie, hope you're enjoying your holiday.

Good luck to all the TTCers. Hello to those I've not mentioned. I'm so dopey at the moment I can't concentrate very hard so sorry if I don't mention some.

So lovely that the new mums still get a chance to pop on and say hello. We need you around to remind us that good things can happen and we love to hear about your gorgeous babies. I hope things are good with Lins, not heard much from her.

Bee, in case you peek in from time to time, you are often in my thoughts. I hope you are finding some peace these days.

Hi Kittens

Just wanted to wish you all the best (and strength//hand-holding) for your scan tomorrow, scary things that they've become at this stage. Really hope it goes well for you.

I know what you mean about wanting to give your OH a child more than yourself - it was like that for me too. DH would have been equally happy if we'd not had children but he's so lovely that I didn't want to NOT give him children when I thought about it (eventually, after 6 years of already being together).

Sorry for not posting to everyone but am dog tired having worked all evening to try and tie up loose ends at work (not done yet...). Lovely to hear from you Shangrila and I'm so pleased to hear that your DS is thriving (though oooooph at size at birth!!).

Love to everyone else. Off to bed now.

xx

Hi ladies, it's my first post in here, although I am lurking and hope to join you one day. I just wanted to wish good luck to Kittens, I hope it all goes well today, I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.xxxx

Thank you ladies. I will keep you posted. I've woken up with a massive crick in my shoulder and very ouchie :-( probably the tension! No osteopath will see me before 13 weeks so desperately phoning around for a massage. Might have booked one for 6pm but now worried in case I will end up crying through the "face hole" in the massage couch if today doesn't go as hoped. (Not that I'm a pessimist! Much)

Coffee, welcome to the "sister thread". I've seen you on the other thread, which I'm afraid I don't spend too much time on these days as a measure to try and keep my unfortunate history just that, but I know you've been having a rough time lately. It's a brave step getting back on the TTC journey again and you will be in a comfortable place here with us I hope. There is much encouragement, hand holding and empathy here.

Hello all. Sorry I've been quiet - my work internet seems to struggle to let me use mumsnet (can't imagine why - its an essential part of my day's business!) so I've lost a few posts in the last few days and not had time to try again!!

Kittens - good luck for the scan today. I'm not surprised you're worried - you've not exactly had any good news from a scan up to now. Today will be different though - I can feel it!! Fingers crossed honey - I so hope all will be well.

As for me, I'm afraid I'm due on with no pregnancy symptoms whatsoever. Trying to resist the urge to pee on a stick anyway, but pretty sure this month didn't work. Boo! Back to the drawing board....again. xxx

Hey - just checking for some news. Kittens - hope you're ok? xxx

Yep, all good so far. Although, to my surprise I measured 5 weeks but this time there was a good heart beat so that's good. They seemed happy with what they saw and have organised another scan in 3 weeks, more for my peace of mind than their concern apparently. So, obviously it means my due date will be later and so will my CVS/scan etc. Hey ho!

Spent most of the day trying to find someone to fix my shoulder but most people wouldn't treat me because of being in my first trimester. Ended up having acupuncture which was quite relaxing at the time but I have a bit of a migraine now :-( and this post is proving very difficult as I keep writing my words the wrong way round and having to retype! Better go and lie down.

Fingers crossed LP. I didn't feel pregnant before I texted so it's not over 'til the you come on!

Yay Kittens re scan! A good heartbeat is great to see, esp if they think you're only at 5wks. Hopefully that will keep you in good spirits til the next scan in 3 weeks.

Boo re migraine though, I hope you are somewhere dark and quiet very soon. Strange that treating a shoulder should cause anyone concern re you being in your first trimester... surely it's the abdomen that's the relevant area??? Funny how things concern practitioners - having lugged a toddler round throughout this pregnancy I now laugh wryly at the whole advice re 'avoid lifting anything awkward or heavy'. Yeah, right...

LittlePoot - good to know you're still around, shame your computer is sabotaging your posts. As Kittens says, fingers crossed; I felt pregnant the month before I conceived this time and then had a period; and I'm not sure I noticed symptoms this time, think I just tested because I was due (and got the scary very faint lines). So here's hoping...

Coffee - good to hear from you; I'm glad you spoke to ARC and I hope you are now on your way to Paris and get some time away from all the current stresses... xx

Great news Kittens, and the heartbeat is a good sign. Will you definitely have CVS regardless of combined test results?

Good luck LP, you might be wrong about the period - pregnant and premenstrual symptoms are so similar!

Shangrila - did you give birth vaginally? WOW if you did!!!

DD1 loves baby sister a bit too much at the mo - keeps waking her up kissing her... sigh... we now have a double buggy, 2nd hand from Ebay as mostly we'll just use the pram and DD1 will walk - seeing DD1 hold her sister's hand in it as they sit next to each other is sooo cute.

Mishta - you okay? you are quiet... xx

Can't - how cute re your DD1 .

Am nervous about how DS will adapt; not long til I find out I guess. We did try reading 'there's a house in mummy's tummy' but apart from noticing 'mummy's big tummy', he was mostly interested in the planes/cars/toys etc on each page...

Numpty, I think everyone is scared of the liability, ie. if you have a miscarriage you might try to blame them. My shoulder doesn't feel much better to be honest, I'm just £50 lighter. Boooo! I hope I can sleep tonight. I have a busy few days of work including a couple of brides that I really can't let down.

Can't - I think I probably will go for the CVS. I just want to know definitively if there are any issues to worry about rather than getting surprises down the line. After 2 TS21 pregnancies I don't know if I can handle anymore surprises. Obviously I know you can't guarantee anything at any stage but I think it will ease my anxiety a bit.

Better go, OH has turned up with dinner

Numpty, we have had jealousy here too... a mix of jealousy and overwhelming affection... sadly, Babycant has often cried when DD1 has touched her because DD1 is unwittingly rough, but recently she has been smiling at her so all good.

He will be fine.

Quick post (again), really great news kittens. A heartbeat is so reassuring.

Heat here has lessened so no more ice-lollies for me!

Numpty, we have gone down the bribery route with DD. Her brother loves her so much he has already bought her a scooter. As a thankyou to him she gets to chose his coming home outfit. This has excited her so much that she keeps checking it is in the hospital bag.

Hello to everyone else.

Hi Allstars - good to hear from you and love the idea of your DD choosing baby DS's coming home outfit! It might become a long-standing arrangement... Trinny and Susannah eat your heart out.

Kittens - thinking about it, your migraine might be due to the stress you've probably had building up towards the scan. I hope it clears soon.

Bye for now...

xx

Aha, we did bribery too.. and still do...

Baby bought DD1 a doll, that cries and coos etc, and a carseat for said doll and a highchair. Was a godsend when we came home from hospital and she was taking care of her baby while I fed mine.

I find cake works brilliantly to pacify her while I feed her sister...

Wonderful news, kittens. I hope that you'll find that all your ouches and twinges just waft away, now that the first hurdle has been sailed over. I'm not surprised at your thoughts on CVS. We did exactly the same. After a handful of T21 experiences, there was no way that I could contemplate a long old pregnancy without knowing. And I think that once you've had invasive testing, it no longer holds that fear factor. Anyway, that's for another day - enjoy the now! I am slurping a rather nice ice cold glass of dry white wine on your behalf.

Numpty and Allstars, the sibling rivalry thing can be a difficult line to tread but I love the idea of presents/choosing a going home outfit. DD is much older than your two but we have had only occasional flashes of jealousy, which she can generally be cajoled out of. It was something that did concern me, particularly in the homeward stretch. But all has been fine and I'm hoping for the same for you both.

Can't - I just love that image of your DDs. A photo opportunity in the making! (And yes DS did come out in traditional style. Having been offered, and turned down a CS 10 days beforehand, I was calling myself all sorts of names - none of the printable - during delivery. But, in truth it was absolutely fine.)

Love to everyone else and one last whoop for kittens!