support thread for women who have chosen to terminate

[busierbee]

Hello
Busier Bee here - I felt that before I went to bed I wanted to open up officially a new place for weary travellers of those on the road that we have chosen to rest our heads, muse, sob, moan and support each other.
Also the kind, compassionate souls who have not been there but who offer their support and lend an ear and pass a gentle word.
We have chosen to be here and we are here and we are not alone.
Thank you so much all of you -for I personally do not know where I would have been in the last few weeks without you all.
Night - sleep well
kisses and thoughts
BB xx

Poppets
Am popping - post two glasses of wine and dashing off to watch my eight year old son playing steel pans at school - International Evening - he was only wee bit bigger than the pans!
The daughter off to Sixth Form for the dreaded A levels - but has to get through GCSEs first - hmmm - has just left to go clubbing in Angel Islington. This is my life - very anxious making when gorgeous teen girl off in very tight leggings and heels - you get used to it - and will hold your hands when you in same situation from my retirement villa in Costa Crap.
Treetops - I so wish you have a wonderful time in Alton Towers - what a treat for you that you so deserve - Hatts will love it!
Birthday mummies - enjoy the bosoms of your family.
Bezzy - has my witches brew kicked in yet?
Lins the pins - that was a very thoughtful way of explaining the aftermath of what we have been through to your husband.
Marriages do so need looking after - as i well now sadly and will tell you all about one boring or slightly drunken night - so well done for doing so. I am glad the messages helped you a little lovey.
Justaboutback are you just about back and if so Hola!
Byee my dears - so glad you there ( although not sure Lovely Man always is.. if you get my drift)>
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Lovely to hear from you this evening, and big waves to those reading or catching up with us later. Hope everyone has a sleep tonight.

leaving it 7 am tomorrow [so that will be 8]. Have anxiety just thinking about it!

BB - do you facebook? I don't - I haven't a clue. But I have pics on there by some magic or other!

Tree - now am confused? You have pics on ther but you do not do it?!
My daughter is the Queen of facebook - And am considered too old to be on it.
Boy a 7 o clock start with a wee baby is some ask.
LM is sitting here trying to engage me in conversation! Tee Hee!
Have a super duper time my dear - you deserve it so much.
i will be Captain Mumsnet for you and Justa!
Oh god - will I cope? May have to organise a jobshare with Lins - everyone else starts busy.

I have a facebook account that I log onto, blunder about a bit, and leave having no idea what I have achieved.

I do not find it satisfying!

Welcome back Justa! Sorry to hear about your scare. Keeping everything crossed that all is ok in there. Will you be able to get an early scan once you're far enough along?

Morning everybody else, hope a good weekend is in store for all

B x

Welcome back Justa. Big hugs and hope all is fine with wee one busy growing. xxx

Justa - welcome back, hope all is well with the wee one, keep us posted.

tree and family - have a great time at Alton Towers!

Have a good weekend all, very very busy with party preps so will talk again as soon as I can. xxx

Justaboutback - sending all the positive vibes up the M1 I can muster that all is well with the little bean.
Hope holiday was restful in spite of the worrying moment.
Glad you back - but do not feel pressure to read whole thing -would take forever and you must have mountains of washing etc. Suffice it to say we are all here and been holding virtual hands very well.
Take it easy.
Have good weeekend with family Eulalia and Marj.
We have guests tonight - first time for ages - and LM on cooking duty. Can not decide if is more or less stressful if he does it -
me; 'chop the onions a bit smaller darling'
me; 'hmm. I usually add more garlic, but it's up to you'.
him; 'do you want to do it yourself?'
me; 'No babe, it smells delicious!' ( as i sneakily add more garlic)
Felt bit teary this morning but have busied self out of it. Hard not to do that - I would be 18 weeks by now and feeling baby move thing, isn't it? Oh dear, feeling sad again.

We must have been due around the same time BB. I was due 7 Oct. Not looking forward to then. (secretly hoping I'll be pregnant again by then and will have had all the horrible testing out the way)

Magic potion must be doing it's thing, have vacuumed the house this morning - hurrah! (Only cause friends are coming around for a BBQ and she's a domestic goddess)

Bezzy xx

Oh honey - am welling up inside.
Same due date. October 7th.
I can tell you now the due date thing is not pleasant at all. Has to be got through and then you think it will get easier but of course what happens is you then think - I would have a week old baby now to cherish and love. And I do not.
Let's keep fingers crossed for you for conceiving very soon.
I am so not sure- LM convinced will happen again and there is only so much can endure.
But want to be making a baby to take away the pain.
What to do?
xx

oh gee, what's the chances of us having the same due date?!

I had a miscarriage with my first pregnancy at 9 weeks, nowhere near as traumatic as what I've just been through, however, when the due date came around, I felt absolutely awful cause I forgot on the actual date. Reason being was that I was 5 months pregnant with my DD and completely wrapped up in her.

Not sure if 7 Oct would be the same though...

B x

Not the same I am sure but a miscarriage also a deeply upsetting time. Different as one mourns the loss and also relives the trauma maybe?
I have no problem getting pregnant - the irony really. Can get pregnant in a month but not sure can have a healthy baby.
Am still in dressing gown - are you shocked Bezzy?!

ha! not shocked, just jealous! Wish i was in my dressing gown, sounds blissful.

Had friends round for bbq, was a pretty pleasant afternoon, am now relatively fuzzy after drinking one or two glasses...

I also seem to get pregnant pretty quickly. Have now been pregnant 3 times, and each time I fell in the first month. Lets hope it happens this quickly next time....

kisses xxx

Bezzy, I have been pregnant three times and it took a over a year each time! Arghh. Honestly, you and Bee are just too fertile.
Glad you had a good afternoon with friends, and the odd glass.
We went out to a national trust garden, and let Dd run about with one of her friends. She is so fast, I will have to fit her with a tracking device...
Could have done with a little more warmth though. Am ashamed to say have just had heating on for an hour. Am off to watch a film and my odd glass or two.
Bee, hope you are having/have had a great evening with friends too, and enjoyed lovely man's cooking.

Hello everyone else, hope you are ok Justa.

xxx

I'm sorry Lins, was insensitive of me to say that. I can't imagine what it must be like to lose a baby that took so long to conceive. I still worry that the next one will take a while to come into existence though.

No shame in having heating on, I haven't turned mine off yet, I can't tolerate being cold.

B x

Oh no, Bezzy, I was only teasing! I am obviously a bit envious when people get preg so easily but it has always happened eventually. I do feel lucky that I can get pregnant at all, when these days it seems so many women have fertility problems. I tell myself that this time it'll be so fast, that would be a real surprise.

Film we started watching was rubbish, so might have to go and have a nice soak in the bath...and then cuddle up with water bottle in bed. (Homer Simpson voice, 'hmmm, warmth...')

xx

Having said that, if it takes a year this time I will be (deep and growly voice) - seriously pi**ed off!

Justa how was your day?

OK, feel free to mock! I'm just paranoid of offending people, as I'm so sensitive at the moment, I assume everybody else is!

Must admit, last time i went to gp to advise i was pregnant, I was met with the response of 'my goodness you must be fertile'! I wasn't sure whether to blush or to say 'thanks'!

Afternoon wine is not good. Hangover kicks in at 8pm...head sore....

B x

(PS BB would appear that we have more than a due date in common!)

Morning ladies- well glad to see this turning into a trying to conceive thread - as is much more positive. See how we are all shifting our thoughts?
Justa - you must be exhausted poor thing - do not think of incorporating cleaner cutbacks in the family budget.
Bezzy - indeed two things in common - but wish I was as clear as you are about trying again. Spend lots of time thinking to myself..well if I got pregnant in August it would be October when tests were done etc. Also may not be as easy this time to get pregnant- the body changes at my age!
Have an almighty hangover - you know the ones where your head is still spinning when you wake up and a bacon sandwich does not even help? Never ever say yes to port.
Linspins - I often start watching a film with LM and end of either sloping off to bath or dribbling on his shoulder as have nodded off post wine. Am glad you bit brighter sweetie - your afternoon with wee girl sounds delightful - I do love two and three year olds.
Off to rehydrate.
Ugh ugh ugh - not nice.
I must stop at four glasses.
I must stop at four glasses.
I must stop at four glasses.
Bye girls

BB - fully understand your hesitation at trying again, after having been through this horrid horrid horrid experience twice. I'd also feel the same. But as my husband (who's in bad books so not an LM today) pointed out, we've been through the worst, so, heaven forbid, it should happen again, it doesn't get worse than what we've already been through...does that make any sense? HOWEVER, should it happen again, I think we may just make our peace with our lovely little girl that we already have.

I forgot to take magic potion last night, feel may fall apart today...I'm really liking it, not sure if the results are just in my head, but so what if they are, at least I'm feeling better.

Ditto on the drinking too much yesterday, I started at 2pm and was pretty much steaming my 6pm, then DD decided to draw EVERYWHERE with a green felt tip...all over herself, including the soles of her feet! Not to mention the carpet and all of her toys....oh joy....what on earth do I want another one for?! Must be mad!

Hope everyone else is having a lovely Sunday and that it's as warm there as it is here.

B xx