Teachers don't have it as hard as my husband says he does

It’s not the fact he’s a teacher. Or his job is hard. It’s that you are picking up the slack and he’s not acting as a partner. He’s acting like an entitled brat. It’s up to him to put boundaries in place on his time at work and not simply opt out of family life as he is tired. Like millions of other working people including teachers do around the world.

He sounds like a very unpleasant person.

If it's the job that's making him this way he should change careers.

In the meantime he needs to pull his weight. Cause he's not.

Some teachers do think they are the only people with stressful jobs and they are special.

It sounds like he’s using his job as an excuse to get out of doing anything to help at home.

While teaching is hard, I suspect that other teachers (and other stressful jobs like nurses and social workers) plan the number of kids that they can cope with and are doing the housework and parenting. He is being selfish and I dread to think what his kids think of him.

DH and I are both teachers, we somehow manage to be nice to our DC and each other, run a house together and have lie ins. YANBU, he sounds awful.

I'm a teacher and my husband is not yet in our home he still acts like your husband and I act like you (except for the bit about you being the main earner).

When you say teachers are you saying all teachers or your sample of one teacher?

If he works 5 days and you 4, I’d expect you to do more housework as you have a day to do it. But not all of it. And you both get one lie in a week.
He sounds like most men I know unfortunately.

I’m a teacher.

It is really draining. I’m technically 0.6 but work at least full time hours for three days’ (shit) pay.

That doesn’t stop the fact that your husband sounds like a massive knob.

You have a husband problem. I was teaching part time, completing a second degree, running a house solo and the single parent of an autistic teen.

I managed, although was incredibly stressed and the housework often got left. Ultimately I left the profession as I wanted a better work/life balance. I certainly wasn't making excuses or being unpleasant to a partner.

Teacher's don't have it as hard as my husband says he does*

You're being tiresome and goady as fuck by comparing your husband to teachers in general.

How long has he been doing it?

Teaching is everything he says, except an excuse to check out of home life.
I'm a teacher and a single parent. What on earth would he do if you weren't there!
This is a husband problem.
Mine wasn't a teacher and took all the lie-ins at weekends and holidays 'because I'm on holiday'. Reminded they were my holidays too, well of course the reply was I got more.
Yours sounds similar.
Does he do anything helpful at home? Cooking? Laundry? Taxi-runs?
A concession to the teacher load would be to drop to 4 days too, but I don't think that would help you - he just drive you up the wall earning less and still being as lazy as.

Genuine question- why do you live very frugally if you presumably earn 60k+ (assuming he earns around 30k as a teacher minimum)

The main issue seems to be housework so get a cleaner once a week and plan more fun stuff. Then he's got no excuse to moan. If he continues to moan then it's him that's the problem not his job.

I’m a teacher and admit I wouldn’t be able to manage the work load if my husband didn’t take the bulk of the childcare. But your husband is taking the piss! I chose my job and I work around it, that often means working till 11 because I rarely work between 5 and 9 - my children take priority. I also get up early on weekends so I can manage housework. Your husband is your problem, not the job. Teachers do have it hard but we’re not all piss taking partners.

A couple friend of mine are both FT teachers with two dc under 8. Funnily enough they manage to do housework, cook, laundry, days out and share lie ins.

He is a dick.

I think you have a husband problem rather than a teacher problem.

I’m a teacher and a single mum so all cooking, cleaning (not much to be fair) hanging out with the kids and life admin falls to me, on top of a 10-12hr working day. It is exhausting. He is not pulling his weight.

This is nothing to do with teachers, it’s the fact your husband is clearly a waste of space. I think deep down you know this.

He sounds utterly joyless. And there's nothing worse than someone who moans constantly about their job (and I'm a former teacher!).

What are you doing on the one day a week extra that you aren't working? Is it childcare?

I've worked as both a teacher and a nurse. My husband was a secondary school teacher. Teaching in secondary is an absolute pig of a job. Compared to nursing - it's harder. Just down to the fact it's So heavily inspected and attritional. However you are both reacting to this mix it's not good and your marriage won't last. It doesn't really matter if you think this and that about teaching. He clearly thinks it. Make a change.

This is ridiculous. I know men with much more demanding jobs who still manage to treat their families well and take part in family life, including cleaning and various chores.
He's using his job as an excuse to be the lazy arse that he is.

If you work 4 days it makes sense you do more of the housework, but he should do some. Doesn’t sound like a teacher problem, sounds like a crappy marriage.

Fancy a little goad on a BH Monday did you OP?

I couldn’t cope with all that “I’m so hard-dun by and you have it so easy therefore you are responsible for Everything, plus I’ll also be mean to our dc.”.

He has choices in life, so he needs to make them pretty quickly so he stops being so unpleasant to his family.