Teachers don't have it as hard as my husband says he does

I’m a full time secondary English teacher (so big marking load and pressure) with 4 kids and I still manage my family life/admin/jobs and am not a twat to my partner who like you earns more and has probably more free time.

Well you half got my point, which is that many people, like you, don’t actually think that changing to working as a teacher is worth having all those lovely long holidays. So saying “most people would give their eye teeth” is just silly - there is a recruitment crisis in teaching, those people could have those holidays without giving their eye teeth, but they don’t want it enough to actually go into teaching. You have ended up making an argument that agrees that teaching IS extra specially stressful/unpleasant as a job. If all those lovely holidays are what many many people want, and teaching isn’t actually any more stressful than most other stressful jobs, then why is there a recruitment crisis?

Oooh, @Tinybrother hang on a minute... where to begin?

Lots and lots of 'post hoc ergo propter' thingies going on there in your post. Fallacious assumptions.
I knew from primary school onwards that I would never, ever want to go into teaching because it would feel like I had never ever left school. That continued throughout secondary.

I do not want to retrain as a teacher as I have already done 7 years training so far, graduate and post graduate as a clinician in the NHS, rotating betwern ITU and A&E, 12 hour night shifts, rotating with 12 hour day shifts. Often very sad situations in which you want to do more for patients, adults and children but you cannot because they're too sick /injured etc to recover.

So please don't tell me I should become a teacher if I want 13 weeks A/L a year...unbearably patronising, ridiculously simplistic so called 'argument.' Sorry, but there it is.

I'm on nights atm but cannot sleep because of all the usual day time noises: cars, lawn mowers etc., children (not mine, as it happens,) coming home from school.

Not a complaint, just the way it is. Please don't suggest ear plugs, have, noise gets through.

I love my profession btw and have no desire whatever to change it. There's a bit of a recruitment crisis in the NHS too in case you hadn't noticed.

.

You earn plenty.
Why don't you have a cleaner?
Money is for buying time and outsourcing drudge jobs (e.g. ironing).

This is what I think too on reading OP

Exactly, so the benefits of 13 weeks of holiday don’t outweigh the downsides of teaching for you. I feel the same way, I have always known I don’t want to be a teacher. Which is why I don’t respond to teachers’ complaints with “but but but many people would give their eye teeth for 13 weeks holiday a year!” - I know that the downsides of teaching don’t make it worth it for me. Just like I don’t respond to NHS workers’ complaints with “but but but the pension!” or whatever other perceived benefit - I am the daughter of a doctor and a nurse and always knew healthcare wasn’t for me, so the upsides don’t outweigh the downsides for me.

Essentially, don’t complain about others’ simplistic arguments if all you can respond to teachers is “but you get 13 weeks of holiday!”

so you can you use the unbearably patronising, ridiculously simplistic so called 'argument.' of 13 weeks AL to attack teachers but godforbid they tell you to train as a teacher if you want it. Maybe don’t use childish arguments if you can’t handle the reply

I’m not a teacher, to be clear

He works more than 5 days a week, including most evenings, you work 4, but you judge him for being knackered? Get a cleaner, and send your laundry out. If you are both working full time then you can judge.

For those saying OP doesn’t work 5 days her second post clarifies: For those asking I am self-employed so have no paid holiday my 4 days a week is 32 hours divided by 5 days working between drop off and school pick-up. It's not a 'day off'. So yes after school care is mine, as is cooking dinner etc which is fair enough.
It does not seem she is trying to ‘teacher bash’ she mentions his profession because this is his reasoning for not allowing her a lie in:
This weekend he had both Saturday and Sunday morning as lies in and when I asked when mine was his answer was "when I give up teaching."

''but but but many people would give their eye teeth for 13 weeks holiday a year!”

I've discovered in my high level research into this issue that 'give my eye teeth' is a very silly expression. Eye teeth are often very dispensable items, not worth holding onto. Perhaps it dates back to cavemen and women needing those canine to chew their food - meat, veg whatever if they couldn't get an adequate fire going 🤷‍♀️

Which is why I don’t respond to teachers’ complaints with “but but but many people would give their eye teeth for 13 weeks holiday''

I don' t either, wouldn't dare... I just dream occasionally of 13 weeks A/L a year. I'm just thinking about that right now after a particularly gruelling set of nights, actually

Me too, but then I remember I would have to give up quite a bit of money and actually teach children, and realise it’s not worth it.

Maybe don’t use childish arguments if you can’t handle the reply...

No, no, I think I can handle teachers' defence of their 13 weeks A/L a year, I hear it often enough... just dreaming of same, as explained above

What?! I was agreeing with you, I thought

We have both said we envy the holidays, but that we aren’t prepared to do what it would take to have them, for whatever reason. I’m not sure why you think I’m arguing against you tbh.

@Tinybrother

'so you can you use the unbearably patronising, ridiculously simplistic so called 'argument.' of 13 weeks AL to attack teachers but godforbid they tell you to train as a teacher if you want it. Maybe don’t use childish arguments if you can’t handle the reply'

Not sure why I think you're agsinst me? Maybe because your reply, quoted above, did not seem to me to be entirely polite.

Never mind, feeling sleepy now 😦☯️

*against

Um, that wasn’t a post from me. I think probably the night shift has caught up with you! I hope you get a good rest.

I honestly don't get posts like this.
You've basically just written 'my husband is a complete cunt, but I'm going to park that, and blame something else, so that I don't have to address the fact that my husband is a complete cunt.'

You. Can. Leave. Him.

Whoops, sorry@Tinybrother, you're right of course that you didn't post that, my mistake.

Sleep was needed, you were right there too. Feeling better, finished nights, not back til Sunday.
@Skyblue92 It was meant for you. But I am unwatching this post now anyway 😊
.

no worries; however I do apologise if it came across negatively, sadly when people mention 13 weeks and how they’d give x for it, it will get teachers defensive and you will get the well join replies, hence the reply especially when you yourself used those exact words in relation to the comments to become a teacher. Your initial post in relation to holidays came across as an attack which I doubt you meant it to. I’m sure you understand the defence as I imagine you would do the same in relation to comments about pensions from those not in sector which are also very common and used to attack NHS staff in regards to pay.
anyway hope your shifts from Sunday go as well as they can do and you manage to catch up on sleep

This!

He's happy to dump all the work on the OP. Why? Because he feels he can. He's a complete and utter selfish knob.

As a teacher, I find a lot of private sector jobs sounds this way. My husband gets 1-2 WFH days and tells me stories from the office, and goes for lunches in the city. HOWEVER, what you don’t hear about is the incredibly late nights, the hotel stays once a fortnight to catch up with work and cut the commute, and the pressure of staff leaving or investors breathing down necks. I can hands down say my husband works harder than I do, and I work very hard and love my job; he just gets to drink more coffee in the day and use the toilet when he wants. It’s swings and roundabouts. Teaching is hard, but not the hardest and the grass is always greener.

OP, your husband needs to move schools or focus on climbing the ladder. The higher you climb, the more you set your own timetable and delegate. The job becomes tougher in some ways but also less of a daily grind and more a case of problem solving using your growing skill set.