Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

Husband left me sleeping in hot car

471 replies

BlueNavy · 18/06/2023 22:38

We went out for lunch today. Husband drove home and I fell asleep in the passenger seat. We got home and him and the children all went inside, leaving me in the hot car parked in direct sunlight with all the windows up and doors closed. I only woke up about 15mins when my son came to look for something. I was boiling hot when I woke up and was so angry he'd left me there.

We'd had an argument earlier and I almost think he did it on purpose. He says he didn't know I was asleep and thought I was just sitting in the car for a while. I'd been sleeping with my head drooping forward about 10 miles so I think it would have been obvious. He says oh i told you "we're home" and you ignored me. I was flippin' asleep!

I'm upset what could have happened if I'd been there longer in that heat. There's no way I would leave a child in a hot car with windows all up so I don't see why he thinks it's OK to do it to me. AIBU? Thank you

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
Original poster
BlueNavy · 19/06/2023 00:37

Florenz · 19/06/2023 00:32

IS it possible to faint when you're already asleep? It's not something I've ever heard of.

Show quote history

Yes

OP posts:
saltinesandcoffeecups · 19/06/2023 00:38

You fell asleep in the car and are embarrassed about it.

It’s perfectly reasonable for your family to think as a grown adult you can figure out how to leave the car on your own.

Since you weren’t incapacitated by drinking or (I’m going to assume) drugs of any kind he didn’t do anything wrong. If he didn’t know you were asleep, why would he open the windows for you?

Original poster
BlueNavy · 19/06/2023 00:39

saltinesandcoffeecups · 19/06/2023 00:38

You fell asleep in the car and are embarrassed about it.

It’s perfectly reasonable for your family to think as a grown adult you can figure out how to leave the car on your own.

Since you weren’t incapacitated by drinking or (I’m going to assume) drugs of any kind he didn’t do anything wrong. If he didn’t know you were asleep, why would he open the windows for you?

Why on earth would I be embarrassed about sleeping in the car?

OP posts:
MichelleScarn · 19/06/2023 00:42

It all sounds VERY dramatic and a bit martyr like. Was the fight also dramatic?

CatLoaf · 19/06/2023 00:43

So odd

JudgeRudy · 19/06/2023 00:43

BlueNavy · 18/06/2023 22:38

We went out for lunch today. Husband drove home and I fell asleep in the passenger seat. We got home and him and the children all went inside, leaving me in the hot car parked in direct sunlight with all the windows up and doors closed. I only woke up about 15mins when my son came to look for something. I was boiling hot when I woke up and was so angry he'd left me there.

We'd had an argument earlier and I almost think he did it on purpose. He says he didn't know I was asleep and thought I was just sitting in the car for a while. I'd been sleeping with my head drooping forward about 10 miles so I think it would have been obvious. He says oh i told you "we're home" and you ignored me. I was flippin' asleep!

I'm upset what could have happened if I'd been there longer in that heat. There's no way I would leave a child in a hot car with windows all up so I don't see why he thinks it's OK to do it to me. AIBU? Thank you

I"d been sleeping with my head drooping forward about 10 miles...."
How did you know that if you were asleep?

saltinesandcoffeecups · 19/06/2023 00:43

Because it’s a really odd thing to sleep through multiple people getting out of a car making general noise. 🤷‍♀️ I’d find it embarrassing to wake up and the family gone snoring in the car by myself.

I mean the whole thing is bizarre if ask me. Do you have form for hanging out by yourself in the car after a day out?

suburbophobe · 19/06/2023 00:45

Next time he falls asleep in the car do the same.

FFS.

Original poster
BlueNavy · 19/06/2023 00:51

saltinesandcoffeecups · 19/06/2023 00:43

Because it’s a really odd thing to sleep through multiple people getting out of a car making general noise. 🤷‍♀️ I’d find it embarrassing to wake up and the family gone snoring in the car by myself.

I mean the whole thing is bizarre if ask me. Do you have form for hanging out by yourself in the car after a day out?

Haven't you ever been tired and slept thigh something? It wasn't a rave or a bomb, it was a couple doors shutting quietly, nothing major. I think it says more about you that you'd be embarrassed to wake up and everyone else is inside. Sleeping is really nothing to be ashamed about, what a bizarre comment.

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 19/06/2023 00:52

SkyandSurf · 19/06/2023 00:22

25 degrees really isn't that hot.

You would have woken up if you were too hot.

If it was sunny id be angry about being left to get sunburnt.

It was discourteous and passive aggressive for him to leave you in the car, so be mad at him for that. But you weren't in danger, don't undermine your own argument by saying its equivalent to leaving a helpless child or pet in the car on a hot day.

25 outside could be extremely hot inside.

Try it, I have. DD didn't want to come into a shop once and I explained how dangerous it was to be in a hot car and we sat there so we could see. It gets very very hot very very quickly.

And I've had heatstroke and believe me you aren't exactly at peak brainpower with it. Confused and disorientated, OP could have been in trouble.

It was a dick move. If you'd open a window for a pet or not leave it there, why would you do that to your wife?

FelisCatus0 · 19/06/2023 00:53

BlueNavy · 18/06/2023 23:49

No he didn't leave me for 15mins. He left me there and I woke up after 15mins extremely hot as was in direct sunlight in a hot car with no windows open, around 25 degrees. If my son hadn't come out I may have been there another hour or more.

Show quote history

I think you're making a fuss over nothing. He probably thought you'd wake up and get out when you felt like it. I'm not in the UK, it's winter here atm, and 25 degrees is cold. We're wrapped up in jumpers with that degrees. It's currently 23 degrees and I've got the split cycle aircon heater blasting.

Original poster
BlueNavy · 19/06/2023 00:53

JudgeRudy · 19/06/2023 00:43

I"d been sleeping with my head drooping forward about 10 miles...."
How did you know that if you were asleep?

Show quote history

Jesus! Cause that's the position I was in when I woke up and my neck was really sore so I'd obviously been like that for a while.

OP posts:
suburbophobe · 19/06/2023 00:54

If my partner had woken me up from a nap he would of gotten a punch in the face

OMG. Thank fuck I don't know you in real life....

saltinesandcoffeecups · 19/06/2023 00:55

BlueNavy · 19/06/2023 00:51

Haven't you ever been tired and slept thigh something? It wasn't a rave or a bomb, it was a couple doors shutting quietly, nothing major. I think it says more about you that you'd be embarrassed to wake up and everyone else is inside. Sleeping is really nothing to be ashamed about, what a bizarre comment.

Show quote history

We’ll no, I’d be embarrassed and laugh about it if it happened to me. You seem to be getting all hot and bothered by it.

Original poster
BlueNavy · 19/06/2023 01:07

saltinesandcoffeecups · 19/06/2023 00:55

We’ll no, I’d be embarrassed and laugh about it if it happened to me. You seem to be getting all hot and bothered by it.

Show quote history

Well I was hot and bothered obviously cause of the situation. You being embarrassed about sleeping is just odd.

OP posts:
ForTheSakeOfThePenguin · 19/06/2023 01:07

WhisperingAutistic · 18/06/2023 22:42

What would have happened to you?
Surely you would just have woken up too hot and then got out? Unless he locked you in?

There was a woman that died this way in the US, she decided to take a nap in the car while her brother headed to his first class with the car keys.

She woke up before she was too hot but couldn’t get out of the car because cars these days cannot be opened from the inside of the keys are not around.

Obviously, we don’t live in a country where the weather requires for everyone to know all this important information but with the climate change, we are heading there…

Original poster
BlueNavy · 19/06/2023 01:09

ForTheSakeOfThePenguin · 19/06/2023 01:07

There was a woman that died this way in the US, she decided to take a nap in the car while her brother headed to his first class with the car keys.

She woke up before she was too hot but couldn’t get out of the car because cars these days cannot be opened from the inside of the keys are not around.

Obviously, we don’t live in a country where the weather requires for everyone to know all this important information but with the climate change, we are heading there…

Show quote history

That's horrendous!

OP posts:
CC4712 · 19/06/2023 01:10

Haven't you ever been tired and slept thigh something? NO- certainly not in the day time, no!

saltinesandcoffeecups · 19/06/2023 01:11

BlueNavy · 19/06/2023 01:07

Well I was hot and bothered obviously cause of the situation. You being embarrassed about sleeping is just odd.

Show quote history

Jesus OP, now you’re lashing out at me because you fell asleep in the car.

Perhaps you should step away from the internet for awhile and maybe take a nap. (But be sure to tell everyone your intentions so there aren’t any misunderstandings 🤣🤤)

suburbophobe · 19/06/2023 01:11

it's winter here atm, and 25 degrees is cold. I guess you're in Australia? Sounds like that is Fahrenheit.

Not 25 degrees Centigrade (sp?). That's hot and it is so right now in Europe.

I have to google the temperature when going to US to find it out in C cos they do F too.

Anyway OP. Yes he was being a dick leaving you like that. He could have nudged you awake and you could have had a nice little kip upstairs on your bed.

Feraldogmum · 19/06/2023 01:12

Hi, I do think you should get your hb1ac checked as sleeping so soundly,through the noise and movement of folk leaving car, is quite unusual. You may have type 2 diabetes.

Original poster
BlueNavy · 19/06/2023 01:16

saltinesandcoffeecups · 19/06/2023 01:11

Jesus OP, now you’re lashing out at me because you fell asleep in the car.

Perhaps you should step away from the internet for awhile and maybe take a nap. (But be sure to tell everyone your intentions so there aren’t any misunderstandings 🤣🤤)

Show quote history

You told me I was embarrassed. Not lashing out and correcting you that I'm not embarrassed for sleeping. I just think it's very odd you would be embarrassed for sleeping, just a statement not an insult.

OP posts:
FelisCatus0 · 19/06/2023 01:16

suburbophobe · 19/06/2023 01:11

it's winter here atm, and 25 degrees is cold. I guess you're in Australia? Sounds like that is Fahrenheit.

Not 25 degrees Centigrade (sp?). That's hot and it is so right now in Europe.

I have to google the temperature when going to US to find it out in C cos they do F too.

Anyway OP. Yes he was being a dick leaving you like that. He could have nudged you awake and you could have had a nice little kip upstairs on your bed.

Yes, Australia. And we use celsius not Fahrenheit. Average summer is 37 degs c. Lucky I don't have to work today. I'm bed with bed socks on and heater going. I'm frozen. It says 23c but feels more like 11.

Original poster
BlueNavy · 19/06/2023 01:17

CC4712 · 19/06/2023 01:10

Haven't you ever been tired and slept thigh something? NO- certainly not in the day time, no!

You've never slept in the day? Or you've never slept through a small noise in the day? Either, wow.

OP posts:
FelisCatus0 · 19/06/2023 01:20

Feraldogmum · 19/06/2023 01:12

Hi, I do think you should get your hb1ac checked as sleeping so soundly,through the noise and movement of folk leaving car, is quite unusual. You may have type 2 diabetes.

Some people are heavy sleepers, some people are light sleepers. There's nothing unusual about being a heavy sleeper. I was sleeping late one morning and we had a town fair and parade went down our street with band and drums. I slept through it.