to think non competitive sports day is ridiculous and a waste of time

[PanicMode]

I went to a prep school where every child's strength was encouraged - whether one's strength was academic, sporting, musical, art, drama etc, it was found and nurtured.

My children's (state) school does non competitive sports day, which I think is ridiculous and in addition is unfair on those children that excel at sport - when do they get to shine or have their potential realised? (This is not because my children are fantastic at sport btw - they really aren't!).

(And for those who are going to say if you don't like it, move to the private sector - if you'd like to pay my four sets of fees, then I'd be eternally grateful )

But it doesn't work that half the class are good at 'academic stuff' and the other half are 'sporty.' At my school, the girl who won all the academic prizes also tended to do very well at sports day. So the argument about giving everyone a chance doesn't really hold up.

Personally, I don't think anything in school should be competitive. It should be about learning, exploring and thinking. Competition works against that - it's just about seeing how well children can conform to whatever criteria the competition has.

We all have different skills. Why isn't there a joke telling competition or a lego building competition? Why not measure children on their ability in diplomacy or creative thinking or singing? Well.. children can join a singing, debate or lego club if they want to do such things. You're not going to force them into it. So why force them into competing in sports?

So Lequeen, you'd have been happy if they had a 'maths day' where you were forced to stand up in front of the whole school PLUS PARENTS and demonstrate your shortcomings in maths, so that the children who shone at maths could be shown to be very much better than you?

Of course you wouldn't. So have maths days for children who are GOOD AT MATHS (ds1 is taking part in one next day, between schools). And have competitive races for CHILDREN WHO ARE GOOD AT SPORT. And let the rest enjoy some fun activities.

kissangel - yes, DD's school do have other events for other children to shine.

They have sports day and swimming gala for the sport side where all take part.

They have an annual pize day where there are academic prizes. There are other prizes here too.

They have an annual competiion for art - the winners are chosen by a local artist, get displayed in the Sheffield art show, etc.

They also have an annual competition for the able oraters in the school - they memorise and read a poem out loud, again winners chosen by some well known local person, etc.

There are fun performance days such as the xx school has talent. And they have an infant nativity and a junior school annual play.

There are music competitions and children chosen to play instruments at assemblies and parent events.

I could go on....

Not everyone can do everything, but everyone gets the chance to do something.

i wonder how much this is the adults reading too much into it..i mean how bothered are the kids who don't win?

DS might have won the running race and the sack race but he was useless at the skipping and the egg and spoon..he wasn't remotely bothered!

"But it never mattered to me that I was so bad at spelling and that others got house points and stars for it, I had house points and stars for math, reading, science, sport, and so on, everyone is different and should be allowed to be so"

I find your attitude intriguing - the house points and stars clearly did not work here. Instead of encouraging you to work harder at your spelling, you simply accepted that you were crap at spelling and happily gave up the weekly star. You got rewarded for the things you were good at, not the effort you put in...not sure I see the point in that system, surely a reward system should be designed to encourage kids to try harder not congratulate them for being effortlessly good at something.

Kids learn value lessons from failing - like failing to ride a bike without stabilisers and trying again and again until they can.
Failing to memorise 8 times tables and working hard till they can get it. They learn valuable lessons from failing and the lesson they learn is that if they try harder they can achieve and they can develop a skill and improve, they can work hard and be rewarded through their effort.

What skill do they learn from coming last in a race?...Learn to fail? What kind of life do kids live where you think this is necessary - my dc has learned to fail every bloody week, when he hasn't won Star of the week, when he hasn't been chosen for the school football team, when he hasn't been voted into the school council, when he has sat in the lower ability group for reading, when he was the last one chosen for the hockey team.

You guys must live very coseted lives if Sports Day is the only opportinity your dcs are going to get to fail.

So I take it non disabled should be allowed to compete in the disabled Olympics then.

It is not or should not be about able bodied children V not so able.

The fact is the world is competitive, and teaching children that it is not, that everyone is equal is nothing short of stupid.
There are going to be a lot of things some people can not do all through life the thing we should be doing is teaching our children that they have strengths and weaknesses as does everyone and they need to know what theirs are and how best to use them

Strengths and weaknesses are no appropriate in a developing child. A child who struggles to read & write in reception can become very successful in these skills as they mature - much better than the kids who seemed to have the advantage over them in Reception. Labelling a child as having a weakness in Maths in Reception does what good exactly?

Stengths and weakness might be a relevant argument for Secondary school kids but imo it's very bad practice to label a child and limit them so early on.

I am not just crap at spelling I am dyslexic, I have how ever improved because I worked at it, I did not spend my whole school life and after crying to my mother that I did not get 10 out of 10 on a spelling test, I do however encourage my children to do the best they can at spelling, both in top set (in fact both above where they should be age wise by miles)

I was very good at sport, however at the age of 13 I had a 36c chest so at high school I eased back on the sports, but again I did not spend eons winging about how the flat chested girls could run/jump with less discomfort.

When I left school and joined the grown up world I knew I could get a job on merit but I had to accept that there was always going to be competition, no one was going to give me a job because they did not was to hurt my feelings, sadly todays children are being raised to think the world owes them a living and that there is one big hugging circle out there, and how ever you want to jazz it up the world is a hard place and is competitive

"So I take it non disabled should be allowed to compete in the disabled Olympics then."

THIS IS PRIMARY SCHOOL WE ARE TALKING ABOUT. Are you SERIOUSLY telling me the little boy with cerebral palsy who took part in every event today, and the boy who is blind who was able to participate today SHOULDN'T be able to take part in their own school's sports day???? Or should be forced to do races they clearly can't compete in? Simply so that some parents can bask in their child's glory at beating some other children who didn't want to race anyway????

I really am gobsmacked.

Sports Day is NOT about learning to fail. It is about enjoying sports on the school field. Yes the kids who enjoy racing should be given an opportunity to compete, but the whole day doesn't have to be focussed round 'giving the sporty children a chance to excel at the expense of the others'.

My experience is that the sporty children are the LAST ones who need opportunties manufacturing.

I am in no way saying a disabled child should not take part in the general sports day at all, we have several less able children at DS2s school who will take part in the sports day, what I am saying is the fact these children can not take part in everything does not mean that no other child should be allowed to.

If you read the whole thing you will see I have an SN child myself and a mother in a wheelchair so I am very pro everyone,

But this should not be about Disabled/ non disabled I thought this thread was about the fact non competitive sports day is a stupid idea, but it seems to have become about the fact that if a child in a wheelchair can not run 100 meters so no one should

Runawaywife - where are all these kids that feel that everyone owes them a living? Where is the evidence to suggest this is a direct result of lack of competitive sports days - it sounds like something from a Daily Mail article!

Oh I wondered when someone would drag out the tired old Daily mail bit

I have interviewed several young people who seem to think that turning up for an interview warrants giving them a job, DS1 has friends who seem to think the play station is all the exorcise they need.

DS1s school (high school) do not make everyone take part in everything on sports day, DS1 could not run a race to save his life, he did however enter the javelin.

YANBU

Both my children have been chosen to represent the school(s) in quizzes, musical advents, enterprise days and so on, should all these things be stopped because not everyone has been?
Ds1 is in chess club, science club DS2 is in the netball team, sailing, cricket, rounders, clarinet,

But there are lots of things they are not so good at, but I still like them to try.

"oth my children have been chosen to represent the school(s) in quizzes, musical advents, enterprise days and so on, should all these things be stopped because not everyone has been?"

But that is the point - Sports Day is the only time when people think it is reasonable to FORCE children to take part in a public display of their inadequacies.

Like I said below, I have absolutely no problem with having a 100m race for the children who want to do it. I do have a problem MAKING children race in a race they have neither desire or ability for, in order to let the 'sporty' kids shine. It's not much of an achievement to beat someone who's a rubbish runner anyway.

I do think my kids' school has it right - as a hybrid sports day.

Life is full of opportunities to experience failure without schools having to manufacture them.

Incidentally Lequeen, with regards to the maths, I think saying to a child 'oh yes, you're a bit rubbish at maths' is CRAZY. I would have described ds1 as 'a bit crap at maths' at the beginning of this year, but he has clicked with it, and now is representing the school in a maths competition. If he'd gone through the year believing he was crap at it he wouldn't have put the work in (and he REALLY has worked hard), because what would be the point of working at something 'you are crap at'?

But DS1 get to opt in to the events he wants to take part in.

DS2s school has a farce where kids have to do things including running up and down putting on a hat and coat and eating a jaffa cake

i think they should do both; competetive ones for the best and fun days for all the rest.

definitely both is the way to go.

Lequeen you are my kind of people

I am doing the race for life next Sunday, it is going to be ugly, like a clip from run fat boy run I just need someone on a bike with a wooden spoon to slap my legs and shout run fat runaway run