to think non competitive sports day is ridiculous and a waste of time

[PanicMode]

I went to a prep school where every child's strength was encouraged - whether one's strength was academic, sporting, musical, art, drama etc, it was found and nurtured.

My children's (state) school does non competitive sports day, which I think is ridiculous and in addition is unfair on those children that excel at sport - when do they get to shine or have their potential realised? (This is not because my children are fantastic at sport btw - they really aren't!).

(And for those who are going to say if you don't like it, move to the private sector - if you'd like to pay my four sets of fees, then I'd be eternally grateful )

hang on, though. do any of these schools have days when they make the kids good at reading compete against each other, then give them prizes & ignore the others? or when the music kids get to be 'young musician', then they just sideline the others. because those would be the comparison to a 'traditional' sports day.

i bet when there's a play, open assembly etc that ALL the kids are involved, celebrated & encouraged, even if they're pretty crap at it. so why not run a sports event along similar lines & keep the competition for outside, against other schools.

i think that there is a place for competition, and for learning that you can't win everything, but that doesn't mean that you have to make it a public show at such a young age. they know who wins games during class, just as they know who gets the highest spelling score. we would be outraged if everyone in a class had to stand up in front of the whole school & recite a poem, even though they can't all read yet. for some reason, it seems to be ok for the sports teams to have their moment of triumph at the expense of the other kids.

why not let them have team sports activities, then send your best sports kids to compete against other schools?

I hate non competitive sports day.
I hate it with a passion.

Life is competitive, and I think this whole every body wins things is stupid.
DS1 is academic DS2 (Is also top of his year) is very sporty.

Not every child has the same strengths, in the real world when you go for a job they are not going to give it to everyone so no one has hurt feelings, we are not doing our children any favours by wet nursing them their whole lives. They are going to find out the hard way you need to be top of your game otherwise

Also DS1 is SN but why should everyone else have to pander to him?
DS2 is not and should be allowed to shine also.

Our school sports day is still about taking part though. The children are in "houses", and each house gets points for a 1st, 2nd and 3rd but also you win one point for your house just for taking part (this encourages those who aren't necessarily going to win to still take part). Then at the end there is a huge whole school relay obstacle course, which has a lot of points awarded to the house which wins and usually decides the whole sports day. So every child feels that they have contributed (including the children with disabilities) but those who are good at sport still get to be competitive.

Even the parents and teachers are in houses (we parents are in the same house as our children) so win points too.

It is a win-win situation really.

But it is just as bad saying to children you are not allowed to do XYZ because so and so can not do it.

My mum is wheelchair dependent but she would not dream of saying no one should be allowed to walk because she can't.

DS1 could not win a race if his life depended on it, DS2 can run 1000 meters at a fast pace and beat everyone else.
I would not dream of belittling what DS2 can do just because DS1 can't.

This is why England is so very bad at every sport, because our children are taught from an early age to be ashamed if they are the fastest, can jump the highest, best at football and so on. It is damaging

I thought the non competitive idea was a bit strange too but after seeing my children having a great time I am really not bothered now. They have one competitive race at the end and I guess as they get older the sports day gets more and more competitive. While they are young though I think this is a great mix which allows everyone to have FUN.

RunawayWife

Nobody minds kids being praised for being GOOD at something.

The point is that having races etc also points out who is the WORST. That is the nasty part.

I don't buy all this stuff about life being competitive. There is value in collaborative work and doing things for fun or interest. If you choose to compete directly against someone else or pick a certain field, then yes life can be competitive, especially in certain areas.

In the US, there is a strong emphasis on competition. Everything is closely defined and categorised so there can be easy comparison to see who is the best. Law firms want class ranking rather than just grade when they recruit.

Competition is artificial. It's based on setting standards that can be compared. In reality we all have a different skillset which allows us to collaborate with others who have complimentary skillsets. It's more valuable, particularly as children, to explore, play and enjoy the process to discover and build upon our own skills. School should be a place to do that safely.

If children want to compete, then let them join a football or gym club but don't force them to compete in an area they clearly have no interest or skill in. It'll just destroy their enthusiasm altogether.

But someone is always going to be last, rubbish, worst at something.

I remember spelling tests every Friday at school, I am dyslexic so I was never going to get 10 out of 10 but I would still have to stand and say how many I had gotten right (3 on a good day )

I would not expect everyone else to have to dumb themself down because I can't spell.
Put me on a sports field though and I could out run, out jump and out throw them.

So what about the child who only shines at sport, so sports day is their chance to shine

YANBU My dd came back from school upset today, the reason being that nobody had cheered her winning the race but had cheered the two girls who came last - weird way of encouraging them to do their best methinks

What about the child who is not academic or sporty? Do they just learn the lesson that they're crap at everything?

"I remember spelling tests every Friday at school, I am dyslexic so I was never going to get 10 out of 10 but I would still have to stand and say how many I had gotten right"

See, I think that's pretty nasty too Runaway. Would have been better just to praise whoever came top and keep all the other results quiet, surely?

i think it's political correctness gone insane jpg..well done to your DD!!

If you are crap at something you are crap at something, it is not the end of the world, and I do not see why children who are good at something are made to feel bad about it.

I tell my children every day to be the best they can be... and that I am proud of them.

DS1 is very bright, and he gets picked on because of this, it is heart breaking, but should he make out he is thick so as not to get called names?

But it never mattered to me that I was so bad at spelling and that others got house points and stars for it, I had house points and stars for math, reading, science, sport, and so on, everyone is different and should be allowed to be so.

Also clapping the child that comes last for putting in effort and not giving up is a good thing, but doing it at the expense of over looking the child that came first and dismissing that child's achievement is just plain wrong

Well I was at the children's sports day today, and thought it was perfect.

First Section;

School (Y6-YR) divided into coloured teams, then split between 10 activities. Points scored according to how many repetitions in 2 mins for each activity. Lovely to see the bigger children helping the tinies, VERY competitive, but on a team basis. Even the 'larger' kids were laughing and having a great time. In a 'competitive' race they would be the ones lumbering in at the end, but they were able to participate, run around for 3/4 hour and have a great time.

Second Section;

Tug of War - again done between the teams, and hugely competitive.

Third Section;

Year group races - heats held previously in the week in PE lessons to find the 8 fastest runners in each year, then they run competitively.

Lastly - presentation of the Cup. No ritual humiliation, every child takes part and is running around for most of the afternoon, parents able to rotate round the activities with their children (they put siblings together), lots of fun, and proper races for the really athletic kids. Children with special needs taking part on an equal footing (because it is number of repetitions rather than first to finish), older children helping younger children. What's not to like?

"feeling the support for disabled children here hmm. Nice to know they can learn from an early age they are bottom of the heap and only valued for what they can do well (in dd's case, Nothing) cos everyone else would rather win win win.
What happenend to team work and valuing everyone?
Oh wait, we're back under the Me Me Me party."

Quite right Riven!! Who cares about them just as long as some parents feel good that their kids came first....

Yes. Agreed.

Competitive sports should be an opt-in.

I'm all for physical education but that's what it should be - education. Not setting children up against each other.

The ones who are good at them and enjoy competing should have the opportunity, definitely but the ones who hate sports and always lose shouldn't be forced through it time and time again like cannon fodder for the sporty kids.

Sports day should be for everyone to enjoy.
Football/netball/cross country matches should be opt-in for those who enjoy them.

But don't the parents feel good when their child gets star of the week or whatever other prizes are given out..why shouldn't parents of sporty kids get to feel proud once in a while too?

Well they can, if the races are opt-in. The difference with star of the week is that there isn't a 'this child is the worst star of the week' sticker. Whereas coming in last is a very visible statement that 'this child is rubbish at sport'.

In fact they may not be - they might just be smaller, or have not found 'their' sport. And it's a shame to label kids as 'unsporty' just because they don't shine at sprint races.

I'm really surprised people are so vehemently against sports days that are enjoyable for all, especially with an element of competition, but without visibly labelling children as the 'worst in the race'.

'But don't the parents feel good when their child gets star of the week or whatever other prizes are given out..why shouldn't parents of sporty kids get to feel proud once in a while too?'

Of course but this simply rewards success and not to the detriment of children who simply can't do something.

I play a musical instrument to a high standard but have never had to 'compete' against people who have never picked the instrument up and played it before. That would simply be unfair...