o say how did we ever manage without...

[yondan]

counselling.

It does seem the 'in thing' at the moment. doesn't it? What ever happened to just getting on with life? stiff upper lip and all that.

It seems that the answer to every problem on here is "get counselling'.

Ooh, I knew I stayed away too long. It appears I missed out on reading that post. Can anyone give me the gist without risking being reportd themselves? I would like to know what I've been accused of.

Op person really is getting off on this now.

I sense deep seated anger problems

I won't suggest counselling.

Wish my dear FIL had got counselling for his deteriorating memory/cognitive functioning- instead he chose the 'stiff upper lip' way and stood in front of an express train. Hopefully the driver of that train hasnt taken the stiff upper lip approach as well.

tottwriter hoenstly, I wouldn't want to repeat it, it was a particularly nasty post about your DP. I can CAT you if you want, but I think you'd be better off not knowing.

tott,she made provocative and lame comments to try goad

Tell you what everyone.. how was your day? Let's ignore Trolly McBitchface.

Tott - don't worry yourself about it. Comments like that really are not worth repeating.

Tott - you don't want to know. It was entirely predictable that she wouldn't respond like a normal person. It's been clear from early on s/he is a troll.

I think I'll pass. I guess I'm a little disappointed that there is still such a negative view of depression out there, but it's not surprising given the bile-filled enviroment that so many people are raised in.

I didn't expect to change the OP's opinion tbh, though I figured it was worth a shot. I suppose the thing which saddens me the most is the fact that no matter what you say, there are so many people out there determined to think the worst of you.

I'm waiting for MN to delete the thread. Sorry that I've got sucked in.

Tott, her comment did nothing but reveal herself to be even nastier than her previous comments have been. Ignore, ignore, ignore. I think the OP is enjoying this.

I know what you mean. I find myself hanging on in there sometimes, trying to be a calming influence to slow the tide of insults which tend to spiral from each other.

stigma exists,but also liberal and fairminded posters who dont tolerate it

Tott - FWIW, I think it was very brave of you to share that, and I really hope your DP gets the help he deserves and needs. x

hope thread not deleted.overall has been sharp and incisive.leaving yondan to resort to petty derision

SirBoobAlot - thanks. We're getting there. I suppose I don't think of it as being all that brave myself, seeing as I'm more or less anonymous on here. There isn't enough detail in there to identify me personally. And I've always figured that if my story gives someone else the confidence to get the help they need, so much the better.

I'm getting there with my DP. And if his parents start interfering too much when they move here, I'll just have to break out of my shell and actually tell them to back off. It's all very well me standing up for him here, but facing down people in reality is a lot harder! My skin still needs a bit of thickening before I'm brave enough for that.

Does counselling always work? On mn, it seems as if it is a magical cure that Cannot Be Questioned.

I recall reading about how counselling in response to a traumatic event actually hinders the victim from moving on, rather than resolving issues.

I agree, scottishmummy. I don't want the thread deleted - there are people in RL who share the OPs views (though most are not so rude) and it's good to hear the counterarguments.

The counterarguments are also not as rude as on this thread

blueshoes - I would say that counselling 'works' if the person is ready for it and wants to change things. No way is it an easy option.

I think it depends on the problem, the person and the type of counselling. So many variables blueshoes.

Plus in a lot of cases it needs to be in combination with other things, maybe other types of therapy and/or drugs.

tottwriter I know how you feel, my DP has a whole list of problems that his family refuse to acknowledge, and so they usually do more harm than good when they do.

blueshoes, I can categorically state that counselling helped me immeasurably

See my initial post upthread

Is it just the person receiving the counselling that has to be ready. How about the skill and compatibility of the counsellor?

Logically, there must be people for whom counselling was a waste of time. They are allowed their views?

blueshoes that definitely has to be taken into account. Unfortunately counselling isn't an exact science, and can often take a few tries to get it to help.