To not want to serve beer at my daughters lunchtime 1st birthday party?

[Narabug]

Am I?

Its at my flat, and is a relaxed, jelly-and-icecream kinda affair, but someone is saying I should be providing 'cans of beer for the dads', we will be having some champagne for the adults after cutting the cake and I'm serving lunch and soft drinks, but I really don't like the idea of people swigging cans of beer at by babies first birthday, AIBU?

Thanks in advance x

Still not getting why not serving alcohol is 'inhospitable'. Not having any sort of drinks or nibbles for the adults, yep that would qualify, but why is alcohol so much more important?

serentity - because it's treating them like children.

So in order to be an adult you have to drink?

I didn't see the point of drinking alcohol personally at a child's first birthday party but each to their own. It's not like you can totally relax and unwind and actually ENJOY your glass of wine or beer or whatever, when you know you've got your baby to look after. Would rather unwind and relax with a glass of wine once they are in bed and fast asleep.

No but the point is that it's a child's birthday party and that's the reason why the OP isn't wanting to serve drinks. So she's treating the adult guests like children IMO.

I don't see that at all, but I think we'll just have to agree to disagree over it

Am amazed at the bitterness on this thread.

OP I think your party sounds lovely.
Enjoy it. I think a glass of champagne to toast the birthday child sounds great.

I would be honoured to attend such a day, and raspberries to those who have been so horrid to you.

FFS people - by the sounds of it the OP wants to have a party for her DC which is much the same as other group playdates she already has with other children and their parents, but wants it to be a bit more special so is putting more effort into the catering.

The parents of the other children ALREADY participate in these play sessions, so presumably THEY enjoy them. I doubt those who think this sort of a party would be torture would be invited as presumably they are not part of this sort of a group already!

Quite different to inviting children from your DC's nursery and not knowing the parents personally or only knowing them slightly!

Blimey - I demand booze to get me through most kids parties!

I don't drink wine, only beer. I think it is an annoying double standard that wine/ champagne is seen as very girly, lovely and civilised while beer is seen as a yobbo, macho drink.

I like to sip a beer the same way others like to sip a wine - not to get bladdered or to escape from reality, but to relax a bit and enjoy myself.

OP is of course not BU to prefer not to provide beer, but if her guests are beer drinkers they may well bring it with them. I wouldn't turn up and expect to be given beer, I take my own.

"FFS people - by the sounds of it the OP wants to have a party for her DC which is much the same as other group playdates she already has with other children and their parents, but wants it to be a bit more special so is putting more effort into the catering.

The parents of the other children ALREADY participate in these play sessions, so presumably THEY enjoy them. I doubt those who think this sort of a party would be torture would be invited as presumably they are not part of this sort of a group already!

Quite different to inviting children from your DC's nursery and not knowing the parents personally or only knowing them slightly! "

chitchat, as I said, what the OP is planning xounds lovely, for a midweek mums (or dads) and babies get together for a coffee and a play. But if DH and I were both invited to attend, and it was described as a 1st birthday party, I'd be kind-of expecting a glass of wine/beer, just to give it more of a celebratory feel.

I think it is a bit much to expect adults to come to a children's party without giving them some alcohol.

I think offering alcohol is the civilized option.

Your party, your flat, your say obviously.

However, I personally like to have in the house bottles of red, rose and white wine, some beer, cider and a couple of bottles of spirits, purely from a hospitality point of view. People can choose any drink they want with me, I've always thought it a bit impolite not to be able to offer a drink to the taste of your guest.

But hey, it's your party and you know your friends and family.

YANBU - your party, your choice - why do people have such strong opinions about it?! If I went to a childs party I wouldn't expect alcohol but wouldn't think it odd if it were served either. Whatever - basically.

LOL at the snobbery around beer however.

Your party, your choice. Personally I would prefer to offer the choice of an alcoholic drink. I don't think it spoils the atmosphere or anything, and I enjoy having a glass of wine/bottle of beer on a social occasion. It worked really well for DD's 1st birthday last summer- chilled out in the garden, kids played and adults enjoyed a drink and a chat.

But if I went to a 1st birthday party and was only offered soft drinks, I wouldn't think less of the hosts. Can't see why it's such a big issue.

This thread is bizarre. I've never been to a 1st birthday party where alcohol is on offer, as far as I can recall.

And all this stuff about it being an adult's get-together - is it really so wrong of the OP to want her DD and her friends to enjoy the day. No, they won't remember it but the OP will have a much nicer day if her DD is happy.

Perhaps I'm making an assumption here that DD is the OP's first child? I wonder if there might be a split between those posters with 2+ or older children who have seen and done it all as far as children's parties are concerned and are just happy to have a bit of adult conversation and a glass of wine/beer, and those of us with a first child, for who these parties are still quite novel?

good point chiccadee - there is pfb-ism at the heart of this.

You may as well argue over which colour laduree macaroons to serve.

Pistachio please!