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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want to serve beer at my daughters lunchtime 1st birthday party?

215 replies

Narabug · 12/04/2010 22:16

Am I?

Its at my flat, and is a relaxed, jelly-and-icecream kinda affair, but someone is saying I should be providing 'cans of beer for the dads', we will be having some champagne for the adults after cutting the cake and I'm serving lunch and soft drinks, but I really don't like the idea of people swigging cans of beer at by babies first birthday, AIBU?

Thanks in advance x

OP posts:
Original poster
Narabug · 12/04/2010 22:36

Thanks peeps!

I'm not uptight, really, if we were having an evening kinda thing or dinner there would be alcohol.

Passay, I think you have got lost on your way to another thread, its: "Am I being unreasonable to think that people being remotely nice to each other is utter rubbish"

OP posts:
tethersend · 12/04/2010 22:37

Depends... are we talking little French bottles of beer or Kestrel Super?

Actually, on reflection, I think it would be better to serve whiskey. Or meths. first birthday parties are hard.

DramaInPyjamas · 12/04/2010 22:38

What about the adults who don't drink champagne? Are you catering for them?

By the way, I don't think you are being unreasonable. Your house, your party, your rules.

Enjoy your day. (:

scottishmummy · 12/04/2010 22:38

have lovely party.give self pat on back 1st yr is big achievement.well done

Hulababy · 12/04/2010 22:39

You could get those nice looking big bottles of beer - it is the Belgian ones, the bottles almost look like wine bottles. Then decant into nice beer glasses. Give that to those who want to toast but don't like the fizz.

Or just give everyone a soft drink.

Or serve what you like.

Jaggers · 12/04/2010 22:39

Maybe a compromise, have get some bottles instead of cans (as less in them) of maybe becks (a light larger) and only provide enough for two bottles per guest.

That way guests can have a relaxing drink, with out there being any risk of people getting to drunk, or get becks alcohol free i promise you no one will be able to tell!

PortBlacksandDweller · 12/04/2010 22:40

If all you want is a sip of champagne for everyone then that's fine.

FWIW i have always served alcohol at everyone of my DCs b'days.

It's more the insinuation that the men need to have a beer that bothers me. What next? A room with Setanta and Sky Sport on constantly for them so they can leave it all to the little women?

Passay · 12/04/2010 22:40

god oyu need alcohol as they are so dull

charlieowner · 12/04/2010 22:42

OP, you are uptight

Hulababy · 12/04/2010 22:42

I think this year was the first year we didn;t have alcohol for adults at DD's party - she recently turned 8y. Just hot drinks. Mind you I had a number of bottles chilling in my fridge at home which I turned to as soon as walking through the door when it was finished, lol!

Hulababy · 12/04/2010 22:43

Ooh no - that Becks alcohol free stuff is really not good. My SIL left some here when she was pregnant, I tried a bottle. Not nice, had a really wierd taste to it.

scottishmummy · 12/04/2010 22:44

Narabug unfortunately some folk being obtuse and abusive.your party you decide the hospitality,and your preferences

enjoy

cerealqueen · 12/04/2010 22:45

YANBU, though I would say, even if you don't provide, somebody will bring some! At our DDs 1st, when we people asked people what they wanted to drink (2pm start, a 'tea party' with sandwiches, cakes, kids food) we were thinking tea and squash, nearly everybody said, I'll have a glass of wine please, and then handed over a bottle. We had only bought a few of those weak french lagers in the teeny bottles as an after thought. DP and I were both getting over food poisoning and felt rather delicate and were a little surprised at that nearly everybody bought wine or fizzy. I'd say my sister was actually drunk and not in a good way. There were stragglers who we had to hint heavily to to leave (the invite specified start and end) Perhaps this is indicative of the types of parties we used to have! I'd say stick to your guns, have the kind party you want.

Passay · 12/04/2010 22:45

if someone says" ill haev a glass of wine" OP what will you say?

Original poster
Narabug · 12/04/2010 22:47

I'll say "sorry, I don't have any wine in, can I get you something else?"

I don't imagine anyone will have a problem with that, after all, people aren't there to drink.

OP posts:
scottishmummy · 12/04/2010 22:48

if someone says" stop berating op" what will you say passay?

CatherineEarnshaw · 12/04/2010 22:49

agree with op
life does not have to evolve around the next tinny
is it not possible to enjoy stuff without a drink

Passay · 12/04/2010 22:49

i would say dont post in aibu

Original poster
Narabug · 12/04/2010 22:49

thanks scottishmummy!

I'm actually quite enjoying myself, its interesting how out of their way people will go to be unpleasant to people they dont knoe who have a different opinion to themselves

OP posts:
scottishmummy · 12/04/2010 22:50

why did you call op a nob passay.tad unnecessary

Jaggers · 12/04/2010 22:51

Hulababy I really can't tell the differance neither can my DP I always put it in a glass and give it to him (he thinks i'm just being nice) - maybe we both have very poor taste buds!!!

baluchi · 12/04/2010 22:51

Dear scottishmummy

pmsl

Regards

baluchi

Clumsymum · 12/04/2010 22:52

Well I have to say that if I was invited to a party, and spent 2 hours or so being offered orange juice or cups of tea, I'd feel it wasn't much of a celebration.

once the children get to 3 or 4 and the adults are spending their time supervising toddlers, then fine, but for a one-year old's party, the little darling plays with the boxes/wrapping paper, and the parents and their friends have a glass of wine/beer or two and chat about life in general.

I think for Ds's 1st birthday I did a buffet (smoked salmon/ choc eclairs, not a jelly in sight). It really was a party for growen-ups. Bless her, your DD won't have a clue what's going on.

Save the jelly 'n'ice cream for a few years down the line

Hulababy · 12/04/2010 22:53

Jaggers - I just found t had an odd after taste, compared to the real thinkk. Not actually a beer drink much - personally prefer the fizz (so I'd be ok for the OP party ) - but really didn't like that alcohol free version.

pigletmania · 12/04/2010 22:54

Why are you serving alcohol after cutting the cake if its a jelly and ice cream affair. YABU if its a family party than why can alcohol not be served, not everyone gets bladdared at every sniff of alcohol. At my dds 1st brithday we had wine and lambrini on offer it was a very nice civilised and fun party.