To be upset by my friends comment to DP

[Lucyellensmumma]

My DD is four and in reception. I have been a SAHM at great financial cost, but i stand by my decision as the best one for our family.

My friend has worked, albeit p/t and over night hours since her DD was 6 months old, but now only works one day a week.

I have got an interview for a graduate teacher job this week. Anyway, bumped into them on the way to the swings yesterday and DP took DD to swings while i nipped off around the charity shops to try and score some clothes for the interview. Managed to find a blouse but will have to concede and buy new for the rest.

Whilst DP at the park my friend said to him that she "really feels the children need their mums at home after school, even more than when they needed us at home when they were wee"

This has made me feel terrible, but we are broke and in debt, we are managing just but its stressful and alot of pressure on DP. One of the reasons i have chosen teaching is because i will get some of the school holidays with DD (i know i wont get them all) and most nights will be home at a reasonable time. Anything else worhtwhile my doing would mean a long commute and therefore long hours away from home. Teaching fits with my family - i can make it work.

I just feel like maybe i am abandoning my DD, she loves me picking her up from school and i dont like the thought of someone else doing it, but im not sure i have the luxury of staying at home anymore - im constantly stressed so is DP, im sure the extra money will help us be more relaxed as a family.

It has made me question if i am doing the right thing or not, my DD is very homely and is only just begining to settle in school. Should i wait a few years do you think? Im not getting any younger, im 39!

I haven't read the entire thread but was just going to suggest you look on ebay for some work clothes... can get amazing deals!

Hi, haven't read the whole thread, but was a bit staggered at one person on the front page being so unsupportive.

I think your dd is a very lucky girl. She will have a mother who will know exactly what she experiences at school every day and who will know everything about phonics, maths teaching, etc so your dd will get some valuable extra, free tuition! And you will get most of the holidays with her. Most of my friends who are teachers leave school around 4.30/5pm and then do work once their children are in bed. It can work and I am sure you will make it work.

The very best of luck to you.

am calming down a bit now - she sent me a message on facebook asking how i got on, i haven't answered so feel a bit churlish really.

I know she can be "bitchy" but i forgive her because she has had some horrible things to deal with over the past year and i guess that makes me a bad friend if i don't?? I do feel that i need to step back from the friendship as i suffer from depression and she does sometimes drag me down a bit (she also suffers, its sort of how we became friends).

OK feel bad now.

sorry you didn't get job.phone and ask for feedback,as it will be really useful.there may be an ouch factor to it but it will be helpful in terms of action points.how you presented etc.

ask them what else could you do to improve application

and take heart at getting the interview in a competitive market

do grow a thick skin about working mum jibes.she wont be 1st she wont be last.this oft touted halcyon myth of majority mums at home and few errant mum out working, is not accurate.Of working-age women with children aged under five,57 percent were in employment.Two-thirds of mums are in employment

and despite what some people chunter working mums are good parents and good workers