For hating this teen phrase?

[Enchilada81]

Didn't put it in the subject header incase it offended anyone!

But basically DS has gotten into the habit of saying "spaz" a lot. For instance when DS2 couldn't get the PC working and then realised it wasn't plugged in DS1 said "you spaz!" etc.

I told him off and asked him not to say it but I think they're saying it that often at school it comes out too naturally.

When DS's friend was here the other night, DS was messing around and his friend said "come on, don't be a spaz"

Another variation is spaz attack. For instance "oh mum it was so funny in history today, everyone was messing around and Mr Smith ended up just having a total spaz attack!"

And now I've just seen on facebook he and some other teens on my friend list have joined a group called "Having a dream about falling over and then having a total spaz attack in my bed"

Am I over-reacting? should I still try and stop him even though it seems they're all saying it?

Whats wrong with 'Joey'?

We say it as in someone who does things for tou like we say 'gopher' as in they'll go for you.

Never knew Joey was insulting, whats they background to the insult?

The thing is, that again, everyone on this thread said that they would tell their children off for using the word spaz. I assume they would also tell them off for saying paki/whore.

However, I am equally sure that many young people will use all of those terms in their peer groups, if that is what their peer groups do.

I honestly do not think that people see nasty language about disbled people any differently than other "ist" language. Although I am happy to stand corrected on that one if a load of people suddenly rock up and say that they think their kid saying "spaz" is fine and have no problem with it - I wouldn't be surprised if they were the sort of people to use derogatory language about other groups as well TBH.

A person who happily uses "spaz" is going to be the sort of person who uses slut or paki I would have thought.

It is very offensive and not only teens use it

Is it a question that the people who are vocal about a certain type of language, it's because it affects them personally. So they are more likely both to hear it, and react to it?

I mean if you ask a black person whether they have experience of racist language, or a gay person whether they have experience of homophobic language, I really don't think they're going to say no. The people I have met in all categories have had language used against them to highlight their "difference".

Some people are just arseholes across the board, others try to be sensitive across teh board, surely.

Again though, this conversation is about language in general isn't it, ratehr than using it at people IYSWIM.

Ah just looked Joey up.

'Joey Deacon'

I really, honestly never knew that it had an offensive origin, I just thought it was a word.

See thats the thing, many people don't research the origins of the words they say, many kids round here will grow up with their parents sayingg 'joey/spaz/spac attack' because its normalised round here, it really is, and when you grow up hearing something its hard to know you should question it untiol someone points it out to you.

i rememebr joey deacon.

tragic realy

I honestly thought this phrase died out in the 80's - is it part of the whole revival thing? Very offensive then, and still offensive...my DCs will be hung out to dry by their toenails if I ever catch them saying it.

ImSoNotTelling: If my friend had a disabled child I'm sure she would be able to love it and I'm sure she'd feel incredibly guilty about her previous comments.
I've pointed out to people before that their words are offensive and it generally falls on deaf ears. People assume that I'm being PC or that I'm very sensitive and then they carry on using those words. Sometimes being blunt works. I think my friend will be glad one day that I said that to her before she ended up using the word in front of someone who has a disabled child.

Masie, my point is that pople in my area have always called people 'Joeys'. I never knew them meaning as I wasn't around then so used them term myself unaware of the background to it.

As Im sure many others do now. Joey is a name and so I never thought it had negative connotations!

Sorry maisy, I read you comment then posted your name I have no idea why

muffin yes I see what you mean.

i think I was reacting partly due to something someone said to me once, in a similar vein, rather than fully to you IYSWIM. Of course i know nothing about your friend or your relationship with her etc and you are the best judge of what to say and to who.

It is an emotive subject all around and I am wary of coming into these debates, as it is emotive for me too, but I don't think people should be scared off posting on some subjects.

DS2 and DS3 won't be allowed to use spaz or retard - not in my hearing. And their friends will not be allowed to use those words in my house.

DS1 will be called both. Probably already has. I reserve the right to be extremely rude to anyone I overhear using either term in the vicinity of ds1.

I remember the ed psych telling me I tested in the retarded range for something and being so upset. Yes, it was the accurate term, but I'd heard it as an insult, so it felt horrible. I think the argument about where terms come from is a red herring, really.

it is really easy, it is not acceptable to use terms like spaz,mong,retard or Joe(why would anyone want to use that is beyond me)
there are loads of other words that can be use instead.
if you don't teach your kids this, then don't complain later when they get hurt.

because the word spastic isn't really used these days i honestly don't think most teenagers relate the word spaz to spastic or to any form of disability.

they use it to mean a moment of thoughtlessness or daftness.

the answer is to explain the origins and why it offends.. might not stop them but better they make that decision knowing the background. same goes for words that have derived from mongoloid such as 'mong'.. users of 'mong' often don't relate it to mongoloid (or often even know that that means).

i am going to look at the link riven posted earlier now because if i can't use the word idiot or stupid (or daft) to refer to myself when i've done something unthinking then i don't know what i'm going to say.

My daughter goes to a special needs college (she has c.p.) and was quite upset when I told her she couldn't put a ringtone on her phone that shouted 'answer the phone you retard'...she thought it was funny...I did not it really bothers me on places like facebook when I see references to 'window lickers' and 'pissing on the bus seat' I also work with adults with SN and SLD and would definatly defend any vulnerable person including my daughter if some idiot used this language in their presence. Just because some words are used frequently by certain people it still doesn't make them acceptable.

Window lickers is just vile. I have instant contempt for anyone who uses it. Last time was a FB status update -bye bye friend.

I just love how its completely fine and unoffensive to call me a wanker just because I don't have the exact same opinion as you, and couldn't possibly appreciate that some words are offensive.
Whatever. No point debating an opinion when you've already been decided on even before you open your mouth. No point saying anything at all when a point of view has already been prescribed for you, accurate or not. You try living your life never saying anything at all that a single person might possibly find objectionable. I do hope you like silence.

pooexplosionsareimproving can you not understand that words like spaz are offensive.
they are not the same as wanker......

people choose to be wankers,
people don't choose to be disabled

Of course I can, which is why I never even came close to saying it wasn't offensive! Why is why I am livid at being assigned that opinion! Again.

FFS, all I did was point out that if you want to get technical then idiot was more offensive than moron which apparently means that I shout spaz at toddlers and pepper my speech with paki and slut.

Do you not see how ridiculous it is for everyone to think the sma on every single word in the language though?

same.

And don't assume that I don't know anything about disability either. Maybe I'm a disabled wanker?

I find these terms extremely offensive but unfortunately people will always use words of that kind.

I think alot of the time it is ignorance and as said people either don't realsie what it means or dont think its offensive because they are used so often. I think its our role to educate our children about these terms and why they are so inappropriate.

I struggle when my BiL uses offensive terms and he does it to wind me up, my 13 yo nephew then finds this very funny so I don't react at all anymore and ignore whatever he has said - treat him with the contempt he deserves!