I want to ask this somewhre where I might get a range of responses so not asking in SN, ismore a would you agree with this lady thing than a AIBU. Sn kids in mainstream education.

[Peachy]

Someone today whom I respect immensely and regard as kind, told me that in her opinion children with disabilities like dyslexia etc (so ampresuming the whole gamut of SEN - SN) shoudln't be in MS schools because of the effect on the other kids.

She is someone who though not employed by school has access to DS1 (ASD) and ds2 (SEN not sure what) during school time in a volunteer role. I pretty much trust her.

DS3 attends an SNU placement, but I do wonder how many people really share that attitude. My experience and belief tells me that different kids benefit from different settings so parents should have final say (it took me 2 years to get ds3 his place, and I face a battle now to get ds1 into SN Comp placement).

?

PP posted an extremely insulting few lines on here yesterday evening, it was hideous to read and VERY personal towards a few posters, not me though.

I immediately emailed MN, and they totally agreed that such ignorant shit should be deleted thankfully.

I am am sure that she would also think my 9 year old ds with cp shouldn't be at his independent MS school that I pay a fortune for, but you know what? I don't give a toss. I would also add that he is top set for all subjects, yes! even ahead of all the lovely NT children - shock horror!

And yes, I have an NT as well, so don't even go there PP.

PP, you were also given some very good advice about what you could do about your situation from the very people you insulted, which you seem to forget.

You may feel insulted by a few comments on this thread, but you have insulted EVERYONE with SN's, their relatives and parents.

If you feel that strongly about your dd having her hair pulled every day, her work destroyed and her possessions taken on a daily basis, go to the school and sort it out.

Tell your ASD theory to the likes of Einstein, Newton, Darwin, Bill Gates, Micheal Pallin etc, etc.

People have tried giving you facts. Despite being given FACTS, you are still steaming ahead with your ill informed OPINIONS.

Lots of people with ASD perform very well in jobs which require empathy and people skills

because, unlike your good self princessparty, they have the ability to LEARN

Where , where ,where have I said that NT children have less entitlement to achieving their potential ?I keep having words put into my mouth !
I don't know how many times I have said it.I believe that ANY child with persistently challenging behaviour should not be allowed to disrupt other children's education.I am not making any distinction between SN and NT.
The comment about challenging behaviour and employment was in response to somebody else's post about career plans for a person with challenging behaviour. I am not confusing the 2
It is great about the company above, and more should follow his lead in employing more adults with SN , but their are some professions which autistic people will never be suited to.

pp my 7yo with Aspergers has more tact, sensitivity, emotional literacy and general good manners than you do

and he can spell and construct a sentence properly, too.

I can't think of many jobs which people on the autistic spectum will NEVER be able to do. I know people who are in the spectrum in many different jobs - often highly respected and popular.

Incidentally it should be 'there' not 'their'.

MABS I also reported,I have alsoasked them to consider delting the latest one based on the fact that I think some of her comments oculd seriosuly upset people with a very recent DX or who are not as experienced with SN as the rest of us. They may choose not to however.

Chilsren with ASD arenot a homogenous bunch- the spectrum is vast. They do not necessarily have zero empathy, not only is it a continuum but in fact the most recent writings suggest that somepeople have almost too much and can be so oversome by that they struggletodealwith it and have to box it away. I fit AS criteria, I have held down good jobs in fieldrequiring empathy and peopleskills such as parental support. There is no one size fits all with SN. Other children with different DX also do well. My friend has quad CP, a voca and has just been offered two places at University. He already has asmall business via a website. He will achieve despite bigotry.

PP my son is ASD, he has been identified as 'gifted' and has an extremely high IQ.

So im assuming in years to come when he could be pioneering research into cancer, AIDS etc and helping to find a cure, or developing software for your PC, or teaching your dd's children you will feel he shouldnt be doing it as its too challenging for him?

totally agree with you Peachy, if i had read this in early days of dx it would have destroyed me, as it is now, i just treat pp and her type with the contempt she/they deserve.

PP, your point seems to be now that any disruptive child should be excluded.

What should happen to these disruptive children?

Sadly MN have contacted me to say that it doesn't break site rules. (PP don't take that as they like it necessarily or justification, they are a stickler for absolutes).

I suggested repeatedly couirsesof action to help your DD PP,and not once did you acknoledge it or say thank you or even I dont agree because. You are very blinkered, have no real understanding of the issues and care not a jot for the real meantal health of peoplewith complexDX'sand those who care for them.

Empathy is anything but dispalyed in your posts.

My ASD boys are in school today selling cakes they amde for Haitian charities after asking and suggesting it. You OTOH are on here posting veiled attacks and self opinonated nonsense. Think on that,perhaps.

Now now ladies.

I do not for one minute agree with some of the opinions of PP but, she is entitled to her opinion, and this thread did ask for opinions.

In the main I think that most people have reacted very well to PP offering new information and advice whether this be taken up or not is up to PP only.

However, those of you who have started sneering at PP's spelling and grammer should be ashamed of yourselves as this is nothing but bullying.

Please don't ruin this thread by ganging up on the outsider.

I didn't read the post PP made which was deleted, and I suspect that this was an unpleasant personal attack from a person who felt they had been backed into a corner. It doesn't matter how unpleasant it was as soon as you start trading petty insults anf higher ground you had is lost.

So come on ladies get back to the issues here do not be side tracked.

Last ditched attempt to explain to you PP.

You and i are similar in as much as we both have the same problem with our children in school. Your dd is being 'bullied' by 2 SN children. My ds is being bullied by lots of NT children.

Now for the difference i have NOT gone to the school and demanded that these children be removed. Even if these children were removed, they would just be replaced by other children who could do the same thing.

I have gone to the school and demanded that some help and support be put in place to ensure that it cannot continue.

So the option of excluding disruptive children, is not going to help or resolve the situation, its a vicious circle.

What is going to help is putting some help and support in place to ensure that not only will my ds not be bullied or disrupted in future, neither will any other child sn or not.

Can you see that?

jacquilinehyde attitudes such as hers ARE the "issue" for our children

when sombody like this is slamming our children and their employment prospects/life chances into the ground - with a good dollop of spite - I think pointing out that they can at least construct a sentence is not unreasonable

it's not banter, you see, nor is it merely a stimulating debate, when it's your CHILD whose life is going to be blighted by the ignorance of people like this.

Anyway back tomy OP.

It ahs since become evident that secretive changes toprovision in schoolare negatively affecting ds1 and we ahve had to apply for further help. So I think lady in OP was tipping me off,sadly this had erupted within 24 hours of the tip off.Am putting things in palce but willbe long and a fight.

thankyou everybody who has given me advice and I have taken it all on board.
But I am talking about the wider issue - the general principle of whether ANY child should be allowed to continually disrupt the education of others (and I haven't changed my argument in that one iota )

It is easy to make typos and disjointed sentences when typing quickly and cutting and pasting, i make no apology for that ,I don't bother previewing.Says an awful lot about the people who make these comments though .

Also , genuine question several people have posted about their autistic children having great emotional literacy and being thoughtful and sensitive towards others.I thought this is exactly what the autistic disability is that you can't put yourself in other peoples shoes.This is why I posted that i didn't think a person with autism would be suited to being a doctor.I am prepared to stand corrected if that is the case

Empathy is affected under classification of ASD:that does not equate toabsent necessarily. Also you can actually learn functional empathy- eg if Xmakes me feel Y,then I can know that A makes that person feel Y aswell. it can become fulent and in time asfluid and natural,and at elast as effective, as inbuilt empthy.

Not for all,but some.

While I'm not keen on do-it-yourself diagnosis I'd lay money on my GP being on the spectrum. He's rather odd, very lovely, and genuinely interested in his patients.

PP, so what would happen if the 2 boys bullying your dd were removed from the school and are replaced by 2 other children who are disruptive or if 2 other children who were not disruptive and already in the school became disruptive.

What have you gained from removing 2 boys?

Also , genuine question several people have posted about their autistic children having great emotional literacy and being thoughtful and sensitive towards others.I thought this is exactly what the autistic disability is that you can't put yourself in other peoples shoes.This is why I posted that i didn't think a person with autism would be suited to being a doctor. I am prepared to stand corrected if that is the case

You won't be the first to think that PP. I also thought that before my DS2 was diagnosed with autism. I suppose you would only know different if you had a child or relative with asd. My son can be affectionate, but it is normally over enthusiastic and more often than not used in the wrong context. Some people with ASD can show emotions and sensitivity towards others, they just need to be taught how to as it doesn't come natural to them. Hope that briefly explains it to you.

PP ASD children can be very affectionate, very loving, love social contact and interaction, be kind etc, but on their terms ie they like to initiate and be in control.