to think that size 14 is NOT that bad?

[Coldhands]

I have always been naturally thin, to the point where I wanted to put on weight. At school I actually used to get asked if I was anorexic (I was not). Sometimes commenting on being 'skinny' (hate that word) is just as bad as commenting on 'fat' people.

Anyway, I put on loads of weight after having DS and it has taken me a very long time to shift it as I can't exercise. I was wearing size 14 clothes for quite a while after, which I didn't think was that bad. Now I am back to a 12, I have had loads of comments about the weight I have lost (which does make me feel good). When I look back at the photos, yes I looked bigger than I thought I was at the time, and for me it was unnatural after always having been thin.

I bumped into a distant reletive the other day who said "oh you've lost weight" Great I thought, then she started going on and on and on about how big I was, and she lost her baby weight straight away when she had her DD (this woman is not particularly slim herself btw), and how I took soooo long to lose weight as I got so big. I told her I was only a size 14 (she thought I said 14 stone and went on about that for a bit). In the end I just "hmmmed" along until she shut up.

AIBU to think that a 14 is NOT big? Obviously I am much happier being a 12, I would say I am now slim but I have curves (and a few more wobbly bits than I would like, but we can't have everything ), and what is this bloody obsession that everyone has about weight? I recently read that a size 12 was a plus model size! WTF is that about!!

send me the krispy kremes

I started a lot of this about bone size. There is a difference between dress size and weight. Bone size obviously contributes to weight; that is why the BMI for a tall person is different to that of a short person. It is your skeleton that determines your height, and as a consequence, your healthy weight range.

Dress size is different, as it is about size rather than weight. I am currently at the top of the healthy weight range; I have in the past been at the bottom of the healthy weight range. At the bottom of my healthy weight range I was an old fashioned size 8 on my bottom half, but I would never fit into a size 8 top unless it was sleeveless, because at 5 foot 10 I have a big skeleton, and my shoulders are simply too broad for a size 8 shirt. It doesn't matter how little I weighed; my scapulae are not going to get closer together. Other 5 foot 10 women may be gracile, but I'm not.

But variation in bone size is included in BMI ranges; people are not overweight because they are 'big boned.'

i was size 12 til i had DD 2. now size 14. not happy about it but in my case feel it is because of my age.

cutting out wine every night, to see if that helps. Now only drinking wine at weekend, on fri night. may go off if altogether.

also if dp cooks he does huge portions. since being out of work, i eat at 12 noon with DD and light snack at tea so eat less.

I have broad shoulders and a very deep ribcage, without a reasonable covering of fat I look like I've got two sets of boobs! Anything less than a size 14 on me is not a pleasant look. That's my opinion and, quite frankly, the only one that counts.

The medical evidence suggests that those who are carrying a little extra weight tend to live longer than those who are their 'ideal' weight and certainly longer than those who are underweight.

I have a friend who sadly has some serious issues regarding food and diet. She is currently a size 6 and obsessively monitors her weight and diets if she puts on a pound. I'm sad to say that she is compromising her health far more than most people at a size 14. Very few people at a size 14 will have any serious health implications from being that size, so long as they maintain a healthy lifestyle.

Xenia- 'Bust size tends to go down as you lose weight in most of us, certainly me although it's still 32DD at 9 stone.'

Not me unfortunately- I've always gained bust size when I've gained weight and it's stayed the same when I lost weight. Now I'm bfing the rest of me is about a 16 but I had to buy a size 22 top recently to fit my chest

there are long term health issues associated with higher bmi - if not the eating disorder type

NotAnOtter BMI is increasingly losing any kind of credibility in terms of measuring health. Many health professionals recognise it is far too simplistic to be of any real practical use in determining health or otherwise.

Surely most people can just look and feel whether they are at the right size or not. Just at the moment, post Christmas and bad weather for running, I'm feeling a bit porky! I can eat less, move more, and it will be OK again.

Obviously if you let it go more, exactly what to do about it becomes a more complex question (how much and how to move, how much less and what to eat), but the basic question of does my body feel right atm seems to be a fairly simple one (mental disorders outwith this, obv).

but bmi is stil a broad indicator surely

BMI isn't a good indicator for very athletic people. I think most people can tell if their weight is due to their athletic physique though.

Probably about as much use as a set of scales and a tape measure, IMO, it's just too simplistic.

In my 20's, constantly yo-yo dieting, generally drinking too much and smoking my weight varied between 8stone 10 and around 10stone 10. I was never happy with the way I looked.

In my 30's I stopped smoking, cut down the booze and quit dieting. I ate only 'good' food and denied myself nothing. I went up to 11 1/2 stone and then stopped getting weighed altogether.

I've never felt fitter, happier or healthier in my life. I must have taken on more calories but they were good calories, full fat milk, organic butter, no diet stuff or processed rubbish.

Someone with a healthy BMI who eats nothing but rubbish cannot be healthier than someone considered overweight who eats stacks of fabulous good for you food!

thesecondcoming - heavy bones are nothing to with fatness but metabolism is. People with underactive thyroids have to work harder to keep fat off. Tis no more saintly or healthy to eat the same diet as a fat person with an under active thyroid when you are a thin person with an over active thyroid.

You don't hear of people in the third world complaining of thyroid disorders making them fat because they generally don't have enough food. If you are unfortunate enough to have hypothyriodism in the third world and have no access to hormone replacements your children may be born cretinous, you may suffer from lethargy, muscle aches, swelling etc and eventual seizures/death as may your children as hypothyroidism can be genetic (auto immune thyroiditis). Hypothyroidism is much more common in the third world as it happens because of a lack of iodine in the diet. In the developed world hypothyroidism is usually auto-immune (like mine).

I'm a 12-14, but pg atm. Still in my normal clothes, but not for much longer!

I am frequently described as slim because I am 5'11 and my BMI is 21-22. (about 11 stone) I excercise and don't eat a lot of crap, but it is not difficult.

When I was anorexic I was 7 stone and a size 6. I can tell you I looked fucking awful, but I was approached by a modelling scout and had friends who modelled who were my size. I was approached THE WEEK BEFORE I collapsed and ended up with a tube up my nose for emergentcy feeding.

If I was 5' tall, I would probably be a bit chubby, but not huge, no.

But on the other hand you get loads of people like my MIL who kids herself she doesn't eat much, but her portion would kill me, to say nothing of the booze she drinks.

Bloody twisted either way!

theseconcoming - no I don't leave the house very often (just had twins 9 weeks ago, now have 4 under 5) but also don't know many fat people... The ones I do know, know they are fat. I know far more people who believe they are hideously overweight only to be pleasantly surprised when they work out their BMIs and a large number of people who want to be thinner than is healthy.

I'm 5'10" and wear a size 14 when my BMI is between 21-23 - hardly overweight!

I'm 5'5 - when I first moved to London 20 years ago I was a size 14 in Topshop, Chelsea Girl, Miss Selfridge - I was not massively overweight but I was large for my frame through a combination of lack of exercise and too much food.

In the first month of living in London I lost a stone and a half due to living with no bus route to the tube station and a massive hill between it and my digs, and cooking for myself for the first time on a limited budget. I was then a size 10.

In 2008, at a modern size 18 following DD's birth, too much food and no exercise whatsoever, I had to lose weight to have an operation - did Lighterlife and lost 3.5 stone to come down to 9 and a half stone. I was then a size 10 again in River Island, Oasis, Next, M&S, Boden etc.

Oh goodie, I thought, let's have a laugh trying the old 80's clothes back on again (I never throw anything out) - well, one look at them told me I was never going to get one arm into them, let alone the rest of my body! And I was being told by people I'd lost too much weight and was looking 'gaunt' at this stage... so what I was back in the 1980's was more like a current size 6 than a current size 10.

I think most modern dress sizes have gone up by 2 rather than one. I'm a 12/14 at the moment (trying to shed a stone) and I reckon I wouldn't fit into those size 14's I wore back then.

And I was wobbly at a size 14 in 1980, so I'm certain that a size 14 in 2010, for a person of my frame, is unhealthy. I don't feel healthy at the moment, hence trying to shift weight.

But as it's different for everyone (as has been amply proven by this thread), what's the point? The OP should tell her relative how rude he or she is being and concentrate on being happy with her shape!

Most high BMI people are not tall rugby players who are fit but eat too much so I do think BMI has its place particularly for average height people like I am.

Or just measure your waist.
www.gpnotebook.co.uk/simplepage.cfm?ID=1584070728

"Waist measurement is a measurement which indicates the need for weight management and reflects coronary risk related to both overweight and a central fat distribution.

• a healthy waist measurement (reflecting low coronary risk) is below 37 inches/94 cm for men and 32 inches/ 80 cm for women
• the greatest health risks are associated with waist measurements greater than 40 inches/102 cm for men and 35 inches/88 cm for women

NICE have suggested that management of obesity takes into consideration body mass index, waist circumference and presence of co-morbidities (1):

Obesity is graded according to the Body Mass Index (BMI):

Healthy weight 18.5-24.9
*

Overweight 25-29.9
*

Obesity I 30-34.9
*

Obesity II 35-39.9

• Obesity III 40 or more "

Quite honestly I'm sick of the "labels culture". For the past few years I've been obsessed with being a size 10 although different shops have completely different sizings anyway. I have now come to the realization that I'm more comfortable at a size 12 or whatever size fits at the time. Tear out your labels I say!

Xenia, I mentioned the waist measurement thing to my GP and he burst out laughing whilst shaking his head.

It's all too simplistic to mean anything significant and quite frankly I believe the constant dieting many women subject themselves too if far more damaging to their health than being a little overweight.

I'll say again, people who are a little overweight tend to live longer than those who are considered a healthy weight or underweight. In general, being alive is usually considered to a bit healthier than being dead. That's good enough for me.

I'm a size 14 and if I say it myself I look great (mostly). I'm average height, but am totally in proportion!!

I'm the girl everybody hates, down the front of the class at the gym. 'Fit as fuck' has been said in my earshot.

At least I think it was fit...

Nobody believes I'm a size 14 becuase like many on this thread, they have been swayed by the idea that 14 means fat. But I'm not fat, I'm slim (ish)

I've seen me show my labels to people as proof that yes, slim women can be size 14.

I wear size 14, but I don´t think I am fat at all.

I am 6 ft 1 and quite sporty (not a gym type, but play sport 2 or 3 times a week). My BMI is around 22.5.

Also, I hate tight clothes. I could FIT into a 10 or 12, but I like to wear losse fitting clothes.

So, on me, I don´t think 14 = fat.

14 is a fairly normal size, neitehr fat nor thin, so what´s the point of this debate?????

I'm around a size 16 (5'8"), but can be a 12 to a 22 depending on how clothes are cut, sometimes in the same store! I've got 34F breasts so if a top isn't cut to fit over breasts then I'd need a much larger size than my chest size would suggest.

With trousers I have hips and waist sizes that should make me a perfect 14 according to M&S. Thing is, all the extra inches that make me taller than average are between my hips and waist (a 'high rise' apparently). So most trousers don't have enough height between the crotch and widest point, and if I hold them in front of me the waist would be about 6 inches below my waist! My legs are quite short.

I stopped buying womens mags and spent the money on a couple stunning corsets. Certainly better for my mental health.

I don't think I'm overweight (my BMI just about agrees) although I should be a bit fitter. I figure the human body is made to try to stay the same as much as possible once you're fully grown, so while getting fatter isn't a good idea, once you are a certain size staying there is probably better than trying hard to lose weight. I'd love to see BMI ignored in favour of a fitness test.

A GP of mine used to say he could see if you were fat but he wanted to know if you could run up and down 2 flights of stairs without much puffing.

14 is the best selling size. It is a normal, healthy size, not skinny, not fat either.

But ... You can't use clothes sizes as a reliable guide to whether you are overweight or not, sizes vary over time and between one shop and another. A 14 in one shop would be a 12 in another. You have to use BMI or waist/hip ratio to tell if you are overweight.

I have a theory that clothes manufacturers cut clothes on the skimpy side in recessions and on the big side in boom times. Everything was huge in the 80s. I used to wear a 12 in the 1990s/2000s, now I need a 14, that must be the explanation...

I'm a size 14 and have been for years but this year I'm aiming to loose wieght and go for a size 12- my ''happy wieght.''

I have been a size 8 and anorexic before and I FEEl so mucch sexier with curves. TBH as long as you are toned it dosn't matter. I sadly am not.