To think that invited guest at a cancelled wedding should NOT ask for their money back

[toolly]

My poor sister has just cancelled her wedding which was due to take place in a European country in June. Two of the couples have asked that she refund their deposits or airfares. Am I not justified in thinking that these so called friends are insensitive, money grabbing unmentionables? I don't want to further my sister's woes but I am seething on her behalf. Am I justified to think that she should just say fuck off to these people and

Blimey - they don't sound like friends to me!

YANBU

Is this real?

How odd of them ?

This is why we have insurance, yes?

The guests are being twats

bibitybobbity, unfortunately yes it is really real.

Nasty friends - as Boys said, that's what travel insurance is for, and even if they don't have any, its tasteless and cruel to ask.

Hope your sister is OK x

Why was the wedding cancelled?

Your poor sister. But at least she has found out what bastards four of her 'friends' are, so needn't bother with them again.

The relationship broke down, but I don't think that has any bearing on the situation really.

Maybe they really need the money? times are hard for everybody.

Sorry about your sister wedding

Well if its real it doesn't sound unreasonable to me .

She has cancelled her wedding. The guests have paid for airfares and ... anything else?

Do airlines refund airfares? If they don't then, yes, I'm afraid I think your sister should pay them back.

If this is true they are the biggest assholes ever.

I'd probably give them their money but I would never speak to them again.

I appreciate times are hard but they are quite well off and my sister has just had her life turned upside down and she's lost quite a lot of money too. They are twats of the highest order aren't they?

If I was flying to a European country for a wedding with my dh then I imagine it would cost, say, £400 for the flights. Sorry but I can't afford to let that sort of money go ...

Sorry, OP, coould you clarify something to me? I just assumed that they had given the money to your sister, not that they had payed their own deposit and then asked for your sister to reemburse them IYSWIM? Who did the guest pay the deposit too, your sister or a travel agent? If it is the later yes, I understand why you are seething on her behalf!

Assuming that only close friends/relatives would be travelling, it seems incredible that they aren't more concerned about your sister.

Can't they go on holiday anyway?

I'm not sure that travel insurance would cover this.

sorry for typos!

Why don't they just go anyway and have the holiday? It won't be covered by insurance, but nothing to stop them going away. I know someone who cancelled an overseas wedding as the bride's father died 2 days before they were due to leave. Everyone who wasn't closely related to the bride went away anyway and by all accounts had a grand old party.

I don't think they are being bastards tbh.

They paid a certain amount to go to a wedding, now the wedding has been cancelled and they are out of pocket, when they had spent to go and attend the wedding.

It is not very tactful, perhaps, to ask for their money via your sister, however I don't think that they are instrinsically wrong for doing so. As gori said, times are hard, and it could have been their only trip abroad this year.

Insurance wouldn't ciover a guest's holiday being cancelled because a wedding has been called off, I can't imagine.

This is a mediterranean country in June, do you think they could not take a holiday instead? They would have been paying for their own accommodation anyway?

bibbity - I wouldn't book flights without having travel insurance, so its not the sister's fault that they don't have it (I'm assuming they don't). Although I'm not sure if insurance would pay out in this instance, they should at least investigate that route first....

And if they can't afford to let the money go, then take the flights and have a holiday (I presume they have accomodation booked anyway). Its their choice....

Not to say I would do this - I agree that it would be thoughtless in the extreme, however I can understand why someone would.

Yes agree that they should just go ahead and go on the holiday.

If you can't afford to go to a wedding, then you don't go.

That includes being so stretched for money that if your dear friend's relationship sadly breaks down you feel the need to ask her to compensate you for her life falling apart.

lobsters that is what i was thinking. i would still go and just make a holiday of it. or cancel with enough time and get 80% back or whatever. it is certanly not the was to be bride's job to refund all the air fares! how unspeakable that anyone even considered asking let alone actually asked ! they would be well off the list of any future possible wedding if it happened to me....

No, they made their own travel arrangements with their own agents. No money given to my sister at all.
Sorry for the x post.