to think that however repulsive and bullying a 12 year old is...

[seeker]

.....people shouldn't use language like "little shit" and 'wankstain" to describe what is, however hideously behaved, a child?

Wankstain is a horrid word to describe anyone, it makes me feel sick.

Little shit I agree with, though at 12 years old he might not be very little

I agree with you wholeheartedly Seeker. (As usual )

YANBU!

I worry that one day this will be people describing my son and it breaks my heart. People know nothing of the child, who he really is or why he appears the way he does.

is this referring to the thread about the bus bully ?

Presumably this is my language you have issue with. If not I apologise, I don't regret for one instant the words I used and would use them again (I don't think I used WS, I hadn't thought of it) in an instant.

You didn't use WS Kreecher.

I am getting really ticked off with MN at the moment, as it seems to be degenerating into expletive driven chat names and abusive terms like WS for everyone.

MN used to be a place to come to read well put together and well thought out postings and enjoy the quality of the debate/argument. It is rapidly losing this and thus its' appeal for me.

Very sad.

I have heard 'hun' branded about which is far worse than any expletive.

Whilst i think it understandable to be rather uncomplimnetary about anyone that causes our children pain i do think WS is a little harsh.

Little shit is IMHO fair enough.

I would also agree that there does seem to be a leaning towards the one word expletive rather than considered intelligent argument in response to a thread.

I use foul language but i do believe that it is unnecessary in many of the incidences it is used on here lately.
i think people are assuming they can come across as rebelious or individual, in fact they just appear vulgar and illiterate

Not defending the use of the word or any words, I am relatively new to this site and I find it refreshing that people can use this sort of language if they choose. That is the way that RL is, I don't swear a lot but sometimes I do let rip.

well I am vulgar and illiterate

fruitshootsandleaves why is 'hun' bad? I have only seen it used as a short version of 'honey' (which does make me boak anyway).

Nice name, by the way!

if anyone was causing my babies a second of pain...sorry,they would be little shits,and i would want to bully THEM!wank stain is a hideous term,i assume it was used for shock value

It was your thread that got me thinking, kreecher. I absolutely understand why you would use pretty extreme language for your child's tormentor. A roused mother tiger is a fearsome thing! But I would hope that others might remember that this is another child we are talking about. And any of us might wake up tomorrow to find ourselves to be the mother of a bully or a victim. Or, as in my case, the mother of a child unjustly accused.

Like it or not, having a 12 YO causing pain/misery to one of your DC, is not going to endear you to that 12 YO, whatever their problems.

Sometimes it's easy to depersonalise the child into a wankstain on the fabric of your childs life, but that doesn't mean that people aren't realistic about how far they can go in RL.

If it's about the general swearing on MN, I think it's a presumption to be made that we're all adults here, and adults normally swear when they're with other adults. I don't swear in front of my children, but I like the expressive language swearing produces

I might use a word like "little sh*t" privately to describe someone. Not in public - not even posting anonymously on a forum.

But do we all swear when we're with other adults? Especially ones we hardly know?

I would like to just copy and paste what seeker said. She is the voice of reason as usual. People forget 12 year olds are still kids.

Seeker, is this more about your DC being unjustly accused of bullying, and you're feeling defensive because of the feelings that bullying produces in people because you think it's being aimed at your child?

Absolutely not. I hate swearing directed at children or about children, and always have. The thought or a 12 year old (however hideous) being described as a wank stain) just makes me shrivel up.

And there have been several threads where the term "little shit" has been used - that's awful too.

'If it's about the general swearing on MN, I think it's a presumption to be made that we're all adults here, and adults normally swear when they're with other adults.'

I think if I commonly used some of the choice words used recently on here with my friends, dh, mother, or inlaws, I would have my mouth washed out with soap. English is a richly descriptive language and there are many adjectives and nouns that can be used without recourse to swearing. Indeed, it suggests to me a paucity of vocabulary amongst some of the posters.

scary - wash your mouth out with soap is something you'd say to a child, which as I said, on here we're not children. There are settings that I wouldn't swear, like a job interview, but I'm not in a formal setting on here, or at school. I don't swear a lot on MN, but when expressing how I feel sometimes I might use it as an underline and get my point across.

Swearing is fine IMO in general. I have a richly scatological vocabulary. But swearing at people is different.

I hate the term little s. I hear people use it to describe their own DCs it makes me cringe inside as do the other gross names. I do not understand why a grown adult would use them about a child. It is a form of verbal bullying, and doesn't require any fore-thought or after-thought for that matter. Life and S are different things entirely, and I lose respect and sympathy for the arguments of those who feel they must resort to that language to emphasize just how bad the other person is; as if makes them appear any wiser or better.

I think swearing online is fun.

I think kreecher was letting off a bit of steam, which might enable her to face things calmly in RL

But I agree that children, in general, should not be called names.