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AIBU?

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Original poster

for being angry with school for describing DD's trousers as 'sexy'?

165 replies

EccentricaGallumbits · 21/09/2009 15:22

They have a very strict new uniform policy.
Policy states classic black trousers. No loose weave or casual trousers.

DD is wearing black trousers (admittedly from new look but they do long lngth ones)

she is tall and very skinny. To get trousers to fit her they are narrow - because she is.

Girls pulled out of lessons and their trousers jiggled to see if they are lose enough

a selection of girls told their trousers are not suitable because they are 'sexy'

My daughter is 11.

I do not appreciate anyone describing her or her clothes as sexy.

I am cross.

OP posts:
GetOrfMoiLand · 21/09/2009 15:25

How disgraceful - I don't blame you for being angry.

What are they doing humiliating 11 year olds by taking them out of their class and jiggling their bloody trousers, fgs.

I would be hopping, I would ask to speak to the head of year, if not the chair of governors.

By the way what are loose weave trousers when they are at home?

QueenOfFuckingEverything · 21/09/2009 15:27

That IMO is tantamount to assault - who on earth was doing the jiggling of trousers? Was it in private or in a corridor? And sexy is totally unacceptable as a criticism of an 11yo.

Original poster
EccentricaGallumbits · 21/09/2009 15:28

no idea.

DD has school ishoos so anything that upsets her is likely to set off more school refusal so i am doubly cross.
will be having words i think.

OP posts:
Sparkletastic · 21/09/2009 15:29

Unbelievable and disturbing choice of word. Do you know the member of staff that said this? I'd be complaining in person and in writing.

TheLadyEvenstar · 21/09/2009 15:29

loose weave

"sexy" weave

basically the second ones are tighter on the bum and thighs

morningpaper · 21/09/2009 15:30

I can understand them not wanting tight trousers - fair enough

Use of the word 'sexy' is odd though - inappropriate I agree

Smithagain · 21/09/2009 15:30

"Sexy" totally inappropriate as a description - and if a member of staff is doing the "jiggling" I'd be pretty furious about that, too. Although it is one of those cases where you need to be sure your daughter hasn't embellished the facts before you go in all guns blazing.

However, blazing guns entirely appropriate if her description is accurate

2shoes · 21/09/2009 15:31

yabu

morningpaper · 21/09/2009 15:31

I think it's fine to stipulate loose trousers and don't like fitted trousers on girls of that age, because it IS sexualised

not sexy, unless you fancy 11 year olds, in which case there are larger problems at stake

GetOrfMoiLand · 21/09/2009 15:31

Plus please tell me where you cany buy classic trousers which are not made of groin-rupturing stiff nylon.

Every sodding year is the shopping trip from hell to find a pair of trousers (dd is very tall). New Look is one of the few places which cater for tall albeit reed thin (and hipless) girls at a price which you would be willing to pay for school trousers.

I am completely shocked by this. Some teachers seem to relish humiliating kids. Jesus.

dogonpoints · 21/09/2009 15:31

You need to ask for examples of loose weave and casual trousers if the uniform policy is this strict (let us know when you find out ) otherwise you can't be blamed when you buy the wrong type. I'd phone.

Tidey · 21/09/2009 15:31

Good grief. 21st century version of making girls kneel down to check their skirts are long enough? If she's slim and those are the trousers you found to fit her, that should be good enough for the school, IMO. They make it harder for evryone by being so damn picky about what material/colour/brand/pattern etc things have to be made from. March back in and say 'At least I didn't send her in assless chaps.'

Original poster
EccentricaGallumbits · 21/09/2009 15:33

DD has no bum to speak of and little twiggy legs. her trousers have to be fairly close fitting or they'll fall off. she would then possibly be accused of pornography.

I understand that the older girls who like to dress like underage hookers (DD1 and her friends) will try to push the boundaries and wear skin tight trousers but at 11 these are on the whole still small girls.

OP posts:
QueenOfFuckingEverything · 21/09/2009 15:33

Parents send their children to school to be educated, not to have their clothes pulled at by staff members and to be told off for looking 'sexy' at age 11!

I would be livid. An adult, especially a teacher, has absolutely no blimmin' business commenting on (or criticising) an adolescent girl's sexual appeal.

diddl · 21/09/2009 15:34

Wrong to use "sexy"-but are the trousers tight fitting?

QueenOfFuckingEverything · 21/09/2009 15:34

Can you link to the trousers in question?

MadameCastafiore · 21/09/2009 15:35

If she has issues why the hell did you not make sure she had the correst trousers so she would not be picked out like this?

And I really do not think at 11 sexy is a word that they would not have come across - if you buy your child clothes in a 90% of high street shops they have the bloody word emblazoned across them!

AND assault, my word, I hope if you are ever burgled or assaulted, like really assaulted, the police are not dealing with a mother having a fit about her daughter having the leg of her trousers 'jiggled'! Really the authorities do have more pressing things to deal with in this day and age.

Original poster
EccentricaGallumbits · 21/09/2009 15:35

Don't get me onto skirts.

policy...

skirts must be straight, pencil style () with a rear vent, reaching to the knee.

Can't wait to see how tight the girls can get those.

I haven't been able to get any that reach the knee for DD1. Am waiting on an order to see if they are suitable.

OP posts:
Original poster
EccentricaGallumbits · 21/09/2009 15:39

Can't remember the specific trousers. they are straight, black, school trousers. Not overly tight or 'fasionable' ones. they fit her around the body and length.
I was under the impression that they would be fine.
I know the average 11 year old is aware of sexy, being sexy, having sex etc.
I do not appreciate anyone describing my 11 year old child as sexy. it is not appropriate.

OP posts:
QueenOfFuckingEverything · 21/09/2009 15:40

If 11yo in question was walking down the street and a random adult too her to one side, jiggled her trousers, examined how closely they fitted round her bum and thighs, and then pronounced them 'too sexy'....?

Teachers do not have the right to pass judgement on the 'sexiness' or otherwise of their pupils, nor to examine/touch/'jiggle' their clothing and bodies to establish the extent of said 'sexiness'

Original poster
EccentricaGallumbits · 21/09/2009 15:41

wasn't overly bothered about the jiggling of the trouser legs. was the use of the word that botherd e.

OP posts:
TAFKAtheUrbanDryad · 21/09/2009 15:41

Wtf is a "rear vent"?

That sounds obscene.

Reason no. 134 to Home Educate.

Original poster
EccentricaGallumbits · 21/09/2009 15:43

little split up the back, which with increased tightness and running around wll get torn and be mended badly making skirt look extra scruffy. or 'accidentaly' being torn so split up the back is increased.

That's for the older post-pubescent ones, not the pre-pubescent 11 yr olds.

OP posts:
TheLadyEvenstar · 21/09/2009 15:44

lol rear vent means small split

hullygully · 21/09/2009 15:44

Bloomers are the answer.

I would be v v cross at sexy. Is just plain creepy.

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