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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

for being angry with school for describing DD's trousers as 'sexy'?

165 replies

EccentricaGallumbits · 21/09/2009 15:22

They have a very strict new uniform policy.
Policy states classic black trousers. No loose weave or casual trousers.

DD is wearing black trousers (admittedly from new look but they do long lngth ones)

she is tall and very skinny. To get trousers to fit her they are narrow - because she is.

Girls pulled out of lessons and their trousers jiggled to see if they are lose enough

a selection of girls told their trousers are not suitable because they are 'sexy'

My daughter is 11.

I do not appreciate anyone describing her or her clothes as sexy.

I am cross.

OP posts:
nappyaddict · 21/09/2009 16:00

I actually think loose fitting trousers look less smart if they are all baggy and saggy on the bum.

GetOrfMoiLand · 21/09/2009 16:01

Wish dd's school would ban skirts. Now those are belts.

Thank god she is a tomboy and wouldn't wear a mini skirt if I paid her.

nappyaddict · 21/09/2009 16:02

There is no way skirts should be banned. Talk about an invitation to thrush in the summer.

Original poster
EccentricaGallumbits · 21/09/2009 16:02

children's clothes should also not be sexy. ever. dodgy creepy connotations.

OP posts:
hullygully · 21/09/2009 16:02

What about a reward system - an inch higher hemline for each A grade?

booyhoo · 21/09/2009 16:03

when i was at school there were several shops that were the official uniform supplier for each school, actually, most of the schools here (NI) still use the same shops. we went and got measured and ordered our uniform. all skirts/jumpers/pinafores/blouses were the same. why do all schools who insist on a uniform not do this.?

hullygully · 21/09/2009 16:03

How does one thrush in the summer? And why aren't men riddled?

GetOrfMoiLand · 21/09/2009 16:04

Especially tops with the word sexy written all over them. Marketed for 6 year olds.

And don't get me started on Playboy pencil cases etc.

Original poster
EccentricaGallumbits · 21/09/2009 16:05

Because schools and their lone suppliers start fleecing parents into buying their overpriced poorly made crap.

Government guidelines suggest all uniform should be available from anywhere affordable (or something).

OP posts:
nappyaddict · 21/09/2009 16:06

If you wear trousers then the ventilation is not so good. My sister could never wear them especially in summer for this reason. The lack of ventilation and the warmth seemed to encourage it.

nappyaddict · 21/09/2009 16:07

Oh and as for boys not getting it they can but as candida is often found in the vagina it makes women a lot more likely to get it than boys.

booyhoo · 21/09/2009 16:08

Thanks EG, i was genuinely asking, i knew there had to be a sensible reason.

lou33 · 21/09/2009 16:09

new look was the only place i could get trousers to fit dd1 as well, due to her height and slender frame

they were certainly not tight, just bog standard black school trousers

i'd be pissed off as well with the use of the word sexy, plus the way the girls were pulled out of lessons. I would have thought educating them was a priority. Sending a letter home explaining that the trousers were considered inappropriate, with an example of what the school would prefer, would surely be a better idea?

MadBadandCoveredinSequins · 21/09/2009 16:19

I've got a certain amount of sympathy for the school's position.

Were these trousers from a school uniform range or from NL's usual fashion stock? Tight-fitting skinny-legged trousers are sexualised -that's why teenagers seldom wear anything else - and I can see why the school would object to girls wearing anything "sexy". If the teacher was using the word to describe why the trousers were (in the school's view) unsuitable that isn't the same as commenting on the girls' appearance. The teacher could have chosen a better word, but it sounds to me as if the school is trying to protect the girls from lecherous interests by ensuring that their clothing is age- and school-appropriate.

DillyTantay · 21/09/2009 16:21

i am anti uniform but I do think that if you are doing it do it properly

maybe hte word sexy was misjudged have NO problem with them checking on unofrom in lesosn time

i think they will survive educationally

Original poster
EccentricaGallumbits · 21/09/2009 16:23

at the risk of repeating myself.

school trousers.

from school trouser range.

not overly tight.

and i thought it might be apparant i do not approve of children being sexualised through innapropriate clothing.

School is attempting to produce little clones through it's rediculous uniform policy (which DDs trousers do not contravene) but that's a whole new AIBU thread.

OP posts:
Original poster
EccentricaGallumbits · 21/09/2009 16:24

shocking spelling sorry.

OP posts:
DillyTantay · 21/09/2009 16:24

i do belive that a cohesive adn well eonforced uniform policy is good for school standards though , bearign in mine where I haev taught.

If oyu dont like it you can always move schools?

Original poster
EccentricaGallumbits · 21/09/2009 16:26

if only real life was that easy.

OP posts:
katiestar · 21/09/2009 16:26

I can't really follow the argument that they have to be tight because your DD is thin ??

.Why can't you get a pair with button elastic waists or GeeJay trousers from independent stockists fit thin children.
Failing this couldn't you tighten the elastic/take them in a bit or even wear a belt.
If your daughter is hating school , it makes me wonder how accurate her story is.I doubt a teacher in this day and age would want to take a young girl out of the clASSROOM AND JIGGLE HER TROUSERS !i THINK YOU SHOULD GET SOME CORROBORATION BEFORE YOU GO IN ALL GUNS BLAZINGe

MadameCastafiore · 21/09/2009 16:29

Your daughter was not described as sexy - her trousers were!

And why again did you send her to school in something that would be an issue and would bring up her issues?

Really in this day and age saying you couldn't get trousers which are appropriate is utter crap and as for this sudden issue of candida - girls have been wearing trousers to school for quite a few years now and as far as I am aware there hasn't been a huge rise in occurance of the deadly yeast!

ElieRM · 21/09/2009 16:31

I assume wearing a smart uniform is, at least in part, about reflecting the good image pf the school?
So is a passing stranger really going to think a school is terrible because a student's trousers fit slightly close? Are they even going to notice?
I was also labouring under the delusion that school was for taching, nit fannying about with student's clothes.
IMHO, if a 'problem' with uniform isn't visible just by looking at the child, and only becomes apparent by jiggling their clothes, it really shouldn't be an issue.

ADifferentMe · 21/09/2009 16:32

MadameC, I can back up the OP saying that you can't get trousers which are appropriate for that build - I have a 5'8" very skinny 13 year old who can only wear skirts for that reason.

She, however, got told off for wearing "kinky" socks!

hullygully · 21/09/2009 16:33

I have a lot of sympathy for the school, there are an awful lot of little girls who are frankly no better than tarts just asking for trouble. And then when teachers get a bit carried away everyone says it's their fault! And how are boys supposed to concentrate if girls are waggling their tight tushes around in between the desks? Those same girls will expect the boys to get good jobs and support them later on. Then they'll be sorry.

ThePhantomPlopper · 21/09/2009 16:33

Agree with both of MadameC's posts.

Seems like a bit of overreaction to an easily fixed problem. I was skinny as child and had to wear school regulation trousers, meant I looked like I was wearing a sack until I got an arse and pair of hips, but thems the rules!