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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to not understand why so many poor people... PART 2

1000 replies

nybom · 10/08/2009 11:59

As things have calmed down a little now, despite DH getting involved , I will try and explain once more what I meant to express by OP.

It boils down to:

I have noticed that in this society a lot of money is spent unwisely/for luxuries and increasingly so. This does indeed occur, as many of you have pointed out, regardless of level of income, throughout the social stratum. What I don't understand is, how the very poor people spend/are able to spend money on luxuries whilst compromising on the basic requirements (such as nutritious food for their children). The examples I mentioned were from my circle of friends, not generalisations.

I was bringing up examples from poor people because if a wealthy person fritters his income away for luxuries it doesn?t affect basic requirements such as food, (at least I have never ever come across anybody), however if you don't have any money to spend, it does.

Before you get enraged, I'm not addressing poor people as a whole, I don?t mean disabled people or people with poor health (mental or physical), nor people made redundant, nor women (or men) left by their partners, or any one else who unexpectedly and by now fault of his or her own has got him- or herself into that situation. Neither do I mean poor people who indulge themselves with their own saved money or money given to them by someone else.

I don't think it is fair that MNs stereotype "the rich", and have a go at them. But how dare anyone say anything negative about "the poor". That is hypocritical.

I only listed how I spend my money to demonstrate that it can be done, not to say how ?great? I am. If I can do it anybody can.

Please don?t make any assumptions what I do or not do in RL to actively help make things better and support people in need...
And I have a great life, thank you, and not a boring one, either. But curiosity is human nature (just look at the topics of women?s magazines, don?t any of you buy those?), and if you walk through life with open eyes, you just notices things. Also, my academic background is in sociology, so I have a genuine interest in wanting to understand why people do what they do. No finger pointing or accusing intended.

Finally, I?d like to respond to some specific points which have been repeatedly been raised:

RE car engine: it is an absolute myth that it is cheaper to leave the engine on rather than turn it off and on again a short while later (ask any car mechanic). In some countries you risk a fine if you don?t turn your engine off at (certain) traffic lights/road works! They?re not doing that for the sake of it. It?s just unnecessary pollution and a waist of money! It is not a matter of ?treating yourself? if the husband waits in the car with running engine and the wife goes shopping in a supermarket (and it is not extremely cold or hot (aircon))! It?s just stupid. I don?t imply you should turn your engine off at stop and go traffic jams, but those where you come to a standstill, where after 2 or 3 minutes of nothing happening it would be wise to turn the engine off (even if you had to turn it on again in 1 minute it would save money). Same with ?popping in? at shops/dropping friend of etc...

RE kids parties: there?s nothing wrong with kids parties per se! Of course it's nice to create something fun for them. But why have branded accessories right down to the bags the kids take home? Again, extra expenditures and extra waste. A nice party isn?t made nice by spending loads! A (simple) selfmade cake (not one of those branded one with loads of artificial colouring, ugh), and a couple of party games is all the children need to be really really HAPPY. The bags are thrown away, as are most of the contents, it is cheeper and easier to use kitchen towel or plastic bags for sandwhiches plus you can choose what you put in the bags.

RE cut fruit: It is still absolutely beyond me why you would spend twice as much money (or more) for precut fruit (not tins!) if you could easily cut it yourself, particulary if you are poor and only have a 5 pound shopping budget.

The UK has become a very materialistic society (but that is a different topic), maybe I just recognise it more as I?m from a different cultural background.

OP posts:
FAQtothefuture · 10/08/2009 12:12

that we're now going to have another thread on exactly the same note as one that only filled up last night. Except the old thread had actually turned into sensible, pleasant, interesting (and even light hearted) by the end,

K999 · 10/08/2009 12:13

You beat me to the last post FAQ!! Darn, if it wasnt for those pesky kids....

GypsyMoth · 10/08/2009 12:14

flatcapandpearls.....lol at the wedgewood!!!

Jaquelinehyde · 10/08/2009 12:17

I am honestly astounded that anyone would be stupid enough to start this thread up again.

Being poor isn't fun regardless of how you got there (I'm amazed that you have actually thought about the seperate catergories of poor, and who is on your shit list and who isn't).

I can not believe that you would judge your own friends the way you have. With friends like you who needs enemies.

I would rather have a poor friend that mismanaged their money, than a smug, opiniated fool.

Tamarto · 10/08/2009 12:18

In reply to the last post on the old thread thre reason it isn't fouble is because electricity/gas etc doesn't cost double when there is two also it's apparently cheapr (well doesn't cost double) to shop for two, or so i was told anyway.

Mumcentreplus · 10/08/2009 12:19

nybom what country do you come from?

Tamarto · 10/08/2009 12:19

Double cheaper

It's coz i iz poor innit.

funkybuddah · 10/08/2009 12:21

Oooops I didnt realise there was another thread (should have done really by the 2 at the end)

While I have made points in slight support I shoudl also point out that i buy precut fruit, alot yummy yummy yummmy :D :D :D

hobbgoblin · 10/08/2009 12:22

i really don't think the wealthy should spend so much it's so UNfaaaaaaaaaaaaair

expatinscotland · 10/08/2009 12:22

You are all feckless.

But since you brought it up, I'll ask once again: if you are so disatisfied with the UK and it's so materialistic and you're so much better why are you still here?!

Why don't you go back to your different cultural background and live there?

Some of us are pretty happy here in teh UK. It's our home, we're proud of it. We like it, whatever its faults.

HensMum · 10/08/2009 12:22

Nope, sorry, still can't manage to work up the energy to get outraged about what other people spend their money on.

And I've got an academic background in sociology too. Marxist theories of consumption are very interesting but applying them to people you know is quite bad form.

K999 · 10/08/2009 12:23

Hell, I even buy peeled grapes...

expatinscotland · 10/08/2009 12:24

She won't say, Mumcentreplus, nor would the 'husband'. He said it was an EU nation but from what he said about the tax structure maybe it is EEA?

Embuggerance · 10/08/2009 12:24

we get free broadband, innit. Not stolen or nuffink, honest!

Frasersmum123 · 10/08/2009 12:25

K999 - where can I get them from - DS2 always leaves a trail of spat out skin

hobbgoblin · 10/08/2009 12:25

i think op is darius guppy in disguise

expatinscotland · 10/08/2009 12:26

And instead of noticing all that is negative about the culture here, if you plan on staying, maybe you should try noting the positive differences.

Makes for a better experience over all.

treedelivery · 10/08/2009 12:27

I was hoping there would be more in the line of tips to wire electricity to lamp posts and nick neighbours sky on this thread. That sort of thing.

Pah!

Mumcentreplus · 10/08/2009 12:28

I only read womens magazines at the doctors surgery and usually Good Housekeeping

Frasersmum123 · 10/08/2009 12:29

MumCentreplus - ours only has copies of Womans Own - your surgery must be much posher than ours!

expatinscotland · 10/08/2009 12:30

I subscribe to Good Housekeeping. It's cheeper than buying it off a newstand, which, given my poor state, would be feckless and irresponsible.

Mumcentreplus · 10/08/2009 12:31

wonder why expat?

Why wont you say where you are from nybom?

treedelivery · 10/08/2009 12:32

I subscribe to Junior because I can afford £300 tshirts on my salary. The child credits pay for the,

VinegarTits · 10/08/2009 12:32

If you hotwire a car, it is not possible to turn the engine off when stuck in traffic, what do you suggest then OP?

GetOrfMoiLand · 10/08/2009 12:32

Don't understand the stuff about turning your engine off at traffic lights. Doesn't make sense at all. Lights change so quickly anyway and you need to be off. Plus, if you have a diesel you have to wait for the glow plug to go out - that takes about 4-5 seconds. Plus if stop and start your engine (esp. at night when you start your engine with your lights on) you will reduvce the life of your battery, this is absolutely true, I am an engineer so I know. Ridiculous suggestion.

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