To feel a bit put out at friends telling me, at the end of my impromptu visit, that they 'like to be telephoned before anyone pops in'?

[Scrumplet]

I'd understand if we'd turned up planning to stay for hours. But DS and I were in the area, and it would have seemed rude not to pop in for 10 minutes, IYSWIM. So we did, and they welcomed us in, and we chatted for 10 minutes in the garden - and then they said, "We prefer visitors to call before they pop in." They were washing up when we arrived.

Anyhow, I feel like a dog with its tail between its legs. I don't mind (in fact, rather like) friends descending on us for brief, impromptu visits - but that's me, I suppose. Were we being unreasonable to just pop in for a few minutes, unannounced?

oh i always wonder what ringing up types are DOING that they think they cant be disturbed

I hope they say that to mates when they haev some terrible illness and NO ONE comes to see them

Thanks for posts. Hmm. It's obviously a different-strokes-for-different-folks thing. They are old friends - I know them both really well. This has never come up before, and I assumed it would be OK to just pop in briefly for a few minutes, being in the area. They could always not answer the door if it was a really bad time, no? What would we have done before mobile phones?!

Oh well. I know now. I hope they and others will still descend unannounced on me, though.

yes white fish i agree it makes them out to be somewhat precious

I love visitors. Get very very few but would die of shame if anyone came unannounced as my house is very lived in.

yes fgs
live a bit

but hten i always agree with gg

Perhaps we just want some quiet time. Nothing wrong with that. Or we could be having sex.

Is it a confidence thing maybe.

If my house is a mess I really don't think that would make someone think less of me.

yes right
sex.

fgs

I don't see what's wrong with wanting advance notice of visitors. I could be cleaning,cooking,having sex, watching a film, snuggling with my partner,arguing with him, working out bills, about to go out,the house could be a mess also and I don't want visitors to see that. Or just enjoying peace and quiet.

I'm anti social anyway but I don't think it's precious to want a little notice

my non-knocking friend walked in on dh and I snogging once -chance of a lifetime.hilarious!

And a brief visit? I find I can't get rid of people. They don't do brief visits.

But arent you a sentient human being able to STOP that to chat to a PERSON?

Or are you kind of mentlal ill?" i must finish cleaning the cutlery drawer or i die"

How very rude of them. I'm afraid I would of said "So sorry to of inconvenienced you, I'll let you to continue your important wsshing up" and left.. and found new friends

Yes I can stop it, except the sex. Wild horses couldn't drag me away then. But I don't want to have to stop it for an hour or more.

I carry on diong things as my friends walk around talking to me ..or I get them to put the dishes away

whenever anyone pops in to see me I am invariably in my dressing gown

Last week it was at 3 in the afternoon after going to the gym and showering, however I still looked like a scumbag who spends all day mumsnetting and watching Jeremy Kyle.

My friend wrinkled her nose slightly too......

agree, i would just carry on doing whatever needed to be doing (most likely sitting drinking tea)

I will admit that I don't really like visitors at all, with a few exceptions,announced or not.

I would hate it for anyone to pop in on me unannounced and I would never do it to anyone - even my friends who I've known since we were teenagers (who live very close by and we are now all in our 40s). I don't know if it's a modern thing but it's definitely a London thing. I wouldn't even pop in on a member of my family without calling first!

Personally I think they were rude to you. I would have felt awful if someone had said that to me.

Fot those of you who don't like popper inners, can i ask waht you do in the 10 minutes between someone calling to say they are going to be popping in and them actually arriving ? Cos you can't exactly do a LOT in those 10 minutes if your house is a tip ?

They could have handled it better, it's true but I too really don't like surprise visitors.

I wouldn't dream of dropping in on someone unannounced unless it was for a cup of sugar.

To me, it says to them, "I don't care what you're doing. I don't care that you might be busy or have plans even if it is just contemplating your navel. I am here and I have decided you must entertain me."