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AIBU?

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Original poster

very unhelpful things your other half can say whilst in labour

342 replies

benbon · 10/05/2009 10:39

just wondering if anyone else's other halves have come out with very unhelpfull advice whilst you were in labour. aibu to think this was not very helpful?

after being in labour for about 6 hours at this point my husband told me "WELL YOU ARE DRAGGING IT OUT ABIT!"

so what helpful things did your partners say to you,.

OP posts:
philopastry · 15/05/2009 19:31

My DH didnt start off well - he forgot to bring my hospital bag from the car and when I asked where it was he said 'Oh I though you had it' (I was 7 cm dilated on arrival, erm no , just this once I thought you might carry it for me)

Also he and the MW sat and ate all my labour food (brazil nuts) while I was close to giving birth - and had the cheek to complain that I hadn't bought something nicer - then proceeded to discuss what they really fancied eating 'Mmm salt and vinegar crisps would've been good...or some green pringles...' etc

Final insult he actually used the phrase 'come on love, it's like shelling peas' - I can't believe he said that - in his defence nor can he, he says he was trying to make me laugh [hmmm]

I am not planning to have any more kids but if I do would want to take my mum with me for the labour. But DH would seriously sulk, he thinks he did a great job bless!

chubbleigh · 15/05/2009 19:50

This is a show stopper.... after the event... "it was worse for me than it was for you!" What? After after an 18 hour labour and an emergency section with doctors screaming and throwing things and people out of the theatre.
He had a great time with the gas & air before hand, like Dennis Hopper in Blue Velvet, he then lay down on the floor in the delivery suite and went to sleep with his head in a rucksack for a couple of hours.
He is now XDP - God love him!

Dodgypins · 15/05/2009 21:30

Well I have to own up to my own inappropriate comment.

After about 30 hours of boring slow labour.. things began hot up.. and the MW offered me gas and air.. and then said..oh dear it doesn't seem to be working.

OH gets out trusty swiss army knife.. and "fixes" it... after a couple of blasts I turned round and snuggled up to him and whispered.. " God I feel randy.. do you think they would notice?"

Do you think he adjusted it to too much gas and not enough air?

Son was born an hour later.. so probably a good job he didn't take me up on the offer.. would have been a bit crowded down there!!

Original poster
benbon · 15/05/2009 21:58

oh yes another gem my husband came out with.. before labour had even started and we were trying everything in our power to get it going he suggested " have an alcholic drink as it dilates your pupils it might dilate something else aswell"!!!

my husband is a plonker...

OP posts:
DamonBradleylovesPippi · 15/05/2009 22:02

this threadis an eye opener - thankfully it's not just me and ny booby prize of an husband .

I'm going to add that dh was clearly disappointed that I didn't do it all natural with dd2 (epidural) like I did with dd1.
I remember to this day the disappointed face when I asked for one, he didn;t dare saying anything because he could feel the daggers coming

whomovedmychocolate · 16/05/2009 00:04

'I know you are a bit crampy but there is no need to be rude!'

dontwanttobeIDd · 16/05/2009 10:59

As we left for the hospital at 8.30pm, dh starts unnecessary conversation with neighbour regarding the possible need for trimming of garden hedge. I am contracting every 3 minutes at this point, it is pouring with rain. (He had already delayed departure to prepare himself a "snack" to take with us in case he got hungry).

Struggle through the london traffic, almost reach hospital, and he stops car again and jumps out. When I protest, he says he needs to buy the newspapers, for something to read...

We get to hospital at 9.15pm. Asks me if I can run across carpark as nowhere to park near entrance. Still pouring with rain - I hobble across car park and squelch into maternity block looking like a drowned rat.

Arrive in labour ward, and he spreads his newspapers and picnic ON THE DELIVERY BED. Offers the midwife a sandwich, and asks, chattily "Have you worked here long?"

I ask, quite loudly, for the newspapers and picnic to be removed as I need to PUSH!!

Ds was born at 10pm.

Ninkynork · 16/05/2009 12:32

PMSL at, "a bit crampy"

bubblagirl · 16/05/2009 12:37

told his dad i waas ok just a bit of mild back pain i was crawling round the floor in agony lol

TheLadyEvenstar · 16/05/2009 12:55

with ds1 ex-p said to me
"Now come on i have been here all day, don't you realise I have been stuck here since 6am"

errr yeah this is me in the fcuking bed!!

then

"Come on we can do this, we can have this baby quicker"

Then

"I think you need to get dressed people can see you"

My blood pressure had shot up i was over heating and had stripped off totally, there were a group of workmen outside watching ds1 being born LOL.

then when he got annoyed with me..

"Is that what you want? do you want another scar?"

to which my sister replied

who the fuck is going to be looking at her crotch to see it?

and i started laughing out popped ds1.

DP with ds2 after i screamed at him
You ever touch me again and I will kill you

"oh babe you know you love me come on give me a cuddle and i will go and collect your mum"

And off he went leaving me with 3 paramedics and a 3 minute old ds2...mind you i only had a 4 1/2 minute labour lol and he was born at home.

SouthMum · 16/05/2009 13:01

Me - sent home from hosp for only being 1cm dialated but had been in slow labour for 10 hours already. Cue me crying as thought it was it but now have to wait, in alot of pain and very scared.

DP - "christ I need a drink to calm my nerves"

Oh and "would a McDonalds cheer you up? I know I'd like one" just after I'd had a chat with Armitage and Shanks due to the pain

I can laugh now....

Ninkynork · 16/05/2009 13:02

Forgot to post mine just, it was a MW to another during a shift-change.

"Don't be alarmed, Ninky finds it helpful to make so much noise and to swear". DH was cringing in the corner but I wanted to get off the bed and shake her I was so angry! Good job she was leaving.

ironmum · 16/05/2009 21:29

When I was in labour with DC2 there were a quite a few of us being pretty vocal on the delivery suite.

I was crawling around on the floor moaning.

DH sitting in a chair eating Hula Hoops and reading a magazine pipes up

"It's like a bloody chimp house in here!"

LilianGish · 16/05/2009 21:49

"I do" - In reply to the question by a passing doctor "Does anyone here speak German?" DH promptly disappears to act as interpreter for couple having baby in the next room! I wouldn't have minded, but I was giving birth in France so might have needed some help with translating myself.

TheLadyEvenstar · 17/05/2009 08:36

lilian LOL bet you wanted to batter him didn't you lol

tattifer · 17/05/2009 08:52

How about in the second day of labour with first girl (at home) "can we listen to some of my music now?"

pavlovthepregnantcat · 17/05/2009 08:54

If I go get some pizza will you eat some with us? [us being him and our best friend who was also at the birth]

babybarrister · 17/05/2009 19:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

thesilverlining · 17/05/2009 19:50

mine kept saying "shhhhh you are REALLY loud!"

And?........

thesilverlining · 17/05/2009 19:54

this thread really cheered me up thanks!

PufferFish · 19/05/2009 21:15

DH was fab during both of my labours ...

However - he did ring my parents (who were on holiday in America at the time) straight after the birth of DS and hand the phone to me while I was trying to deliver the placenta. My poor Dad didn't know where to put himself when I explained that the reason the conversation was so stop-start was because I was trying to expel the large afterbirth

EllieorOllie · 20/05/2009 00:37

DH slept through my labour with DD. I was annoyed at the time but in hindsight it was distinctly preferable to the 3 hour conversation he had with the student midwife about small animal breeding while i was labouring with DS. In the end i said oh so politely 'I'm sorry, i don't mean to be rude, but could you two stop talking about dogs so that i can concentrate on pushing?'. They shut up quite quickly.

The classic comment came from the obstetrician while he was sewing me up after i gave birth to DD, strapped to the bed with my legs in stirrups.

obs 'i'm just going to pop this pain killer up your bottom'
me 'i'd really rather you didn't'
obs 'well, from where i'm standing it doens't look like you've got a lot of choice in the matter'

lilysmummy2007 · 20/05/2009 05:02

after a slow and grueling labor, with 8 different peoples fingers up my fanny checking on my dilation which stayed at 6cm for almost 20 hours, dh walks in after i chased him and my mum home the night before and asks'did you get a good nights rest then', wanted to throw a cardboard vomit cup at him!!!had emcs after failure to progress

ohjoyofjoys · 16/06/2009 20:08

My DH said that "the pain was just weakness leaving the body - breathe darling!"

Have made him pay for it since!!!

pootros · 07/12/2010 20:06

lol pottycock " little donkey"