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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that age 9 is too young to go the cinema in the evening without an adult ....?

501 replies

dicksbird · 19/04/2009 15:42

Just collected DD from a sleepover. She is 9 but friend she stayed with is 10 and another girl also sleeping over is just 10. They are all in year 5.

I knew there was some mention that a cinema trip may be involved but I wasnt specifically told beforehand.

Now I find out they were dropped outside the cinema at 6.30pm amd picked up at 8.30 from outside. None of them had a mobile phone !!

Mumsney jury what do you think ??? Am i just being silly ???

OP posts:
Springfleurs · 19/04/2009 15:45

What age is year 5? I used to go to the cinema with a friend from the age of 9 onwards, same thing, dropped off, picked up etc.

I wouldn't mind this I don't think but I would have liked to be told that it was happening and yes, would have liked them to have a mobile.

admylin · 19/04/2009 15:45

As long as they were taken and picked up I think that's fine, I would be OK with that anyway and my dd is 9.

Springfleurs · 19/04/2009 15:48

just saw that you did actually say how old they were.

macdoodle · 19/04/2009 15:50

Mine is nearly 8, I think at 9/10 I would be fine with this, but yes I would like to know and think would be sensible for one of them at least to have a mobile!

MrsMagooo · 19/04/2009 15:56

Hhhhmmmm - personally I think it's a little to young, I'd have been inclined to stay but sit a few rows back from them so that I didn't cramp their style to much

So no, I don't think YABU.

girlylala0807 · 19/04/2009 15:58

Id be more upset a 9 year old had a phone!

Whats that about?

If they were picked up and dropped off and in a group in a busy public place id say that was fine.

Beetroot · 19/04/2009 16:00

I havew not problem with this

OldLadyKnowsNothing · 19/04/2009 16:00

I think it's fine.

violethill · 19/04/2009 16:05

Fine. There were 3 of them together,they were dropped off and picked up... I bet they had a great time! Adults and 10 year olds often don't have the same taste in films, so it makes sense to let them watch it independently.

Springfleurs · 19/04/2009 16:11

Personally I do not think it a problem for a 9 year old to have a mobile if out unsupervised. Makes sense to me.

debs40 · 19/04/2009 16:14

It's about trusting the children at the end of the day. If you trust that the children are sensible enough to go and see a film and wait for a lift, then there should be no problem. Being dropped off and picked up from right outside the cinema should be sufficient.

If you think they are not sensible enough to see a film or will wander off rather than be picked up, then yes it's a problem.

Assuming that they are sensible children, what on earth else was likely to happen to them in a public place full of adults?

Why should children so young be expected to have a telephone? I really can't understand that - that is the real shocker

Jeffa · 19/04/2009 16:15

I don't have a problem with it. Gives them some responsibility and they probably enjoyed it.

cat64 · 19/04/2009 16:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

womblingfree · 19/04/2009 16:43

I don't think it's too bad, but like you I would like to have been told beforehand. Can only assume that perhaps it wasn't a definite that they would go and that's why no mention was 'formally' made?

My niece is nearly 10 and I would certainly imagine she could be trusted to do something like that.

If DD wanted to do something like that in a few years time I'd probably go to a multiplex where I could go and watch something else but still be 'on-site' for the first couple of times.

roisin · 19/04/2009 16:48

I don't have a problem with this at all.

chocolateismyonlyweakness · 19/04/2009 17:00

YANBU, I would have stayed, but would have sat outside, no problem for me as there is a bar at our local cinema!

screamingabdab · 19/04/2009 17:16

I think it's fine, and I think it's a shame that 9 year olds are expected to have phones. If there was an emergency, one of them could have asked an adult to make a phonecall for them.

WE managed to conduct our lives without mobile phones. I wonder if having one stunts their ability to make reasoned judgments for themselves.

Sorry if I sound like a grump, but I feel quite strongly about this.

I think you should have been told , but would you have let her go?

womblingfree: sounds like a good idea

Springfleurs · 19/04/2009 17:24

I really don't understand this anti mobile phone thing. Yes WE managed to conduct our lives without mobile phones, we also drove everywhere without seatbelts on, times have moved on.

Personally if my 9 year old was out and didn't come out of the cinema when they were supposed to or turned up late or whatever I would desperately want some way of contacting or tracking them.

Original poster
dicksbird · 19/04/2009 17:34

thanks ladies.

I wouldnt have let her go no. Its a busy area in town with soem rather dubious pubs nearby.

What if there had been a fire at the cinema ?

Yes we conducted our lives without mobiles but I would not have been allowed into town on a saturday night aged 9 !

It was all planned that they would go to the cinema and I am amazed that it wasnt discussed with me before.

The parents do tend to treat host dd as though she is 15 so I should have guessed realy.

Also the film they went to see was a PG. I thought they had to be accompanied by an adult?

OP posts:
hayley79 · 19/04/2009 17:37

omg that is disgusting

hayley79 · 19/04/2009 17:42

i wouldnt let my 12 year old go to the pictures i think its wrong i make sure my son has his mobile fone with him when he goes to school and phones my me when he goes in and when he comes out. no chance of getting kiddnapped by a mobile is there??

Thunderduck · 19/04/2009 17:44

Kidnapped by a mobile? Eh?

Samantha28 · 19/04/2009 17:45

i think that the parents concerned should have checked with you that it was ok. being left alone and watching a PG i mean

womblingfree · 19/04/2009 17:46

I think so - although I do say it myself - screaming! But then I have another 5 years or so before I need to worry about it !

Must admit I don't entirely understand the anti-mobile thing. One of the parents could always have let them borrow theirs for the night as an extra precaution - doesn't mean they have to have their own and be glued to it all the time.

If you had my mum suggesting that it would be handy for my DD to have one at the age of 4.7 I could see your point .

hayley79 · 19/04/2009 17:46

what i mean is someone thinks its ok for 9 yr olds to go the pictures and to b left on their own and at the same time thinks it would b more disturbing to have a mobile hmmmm???