to want my DS to attend a more white than black school?

[NattyTurkeyAndEggnog]

am posting this timidly in case it is misinterpred...

there is a choice of two catholic schools locally, one is three quaters black african, and the other is three quaters white british.

now i said to dh that id prefer the white majority school, as i feel my white children would fit in better, and i would with the other parents. i dont mean it in a way that i think white ppl are better, or anything like that, in fact the other school has higher exam results. just that i am concerned with sending my child to a school that they will be very much a minority.

but DH said that he should go to the better results school.

now im torn, because im very aware that kids pick up on a child being different, and i was bullied horrendously in school.

please dont read this as a black/white thing, i would feel the same about him going to a non-religous school for the same reasons.

ok i will stand back and wait for the back lash now

Not sending your child to a certain school because the other kids are mainlhy rich/poor is NOT the same as because most of them are a different colour to yours.

I started to write a huge long reply, but all I really have to say is YABVU.

you say in your first post "because im very aware that kids pick up on a child being different"

then you say "both my DC have diff race friends i dont have a colour issue"

So if your kids are happy to have friends of all different races and presumably don't pick up on their differences, what makes you think the kids in the school you don't want them to go to will be any different? I am sure they are used to different races and colours too.

yes it is, if my child was a minority amoungst his peers because he doesnt have the latest gadgets etc, he will have trouble fitting in.
exactly the same as if he is a minority because he doesnt speak the same first language, he will have trouble fitting in..

jeez all ppl see is colour

beanieb that is a valid point.

I volunteered last week in a Y3 class of about 25 kids where there was only one white British girl, the rest were from all over - Arabs, Eastern Europeans, Africans, Jamaicans, Indians, Pakistanis, Sri Lankans -and it did not make a jot of difference to anyone in the class, the kids all got on with each other just as you would expect. You will find that at Primary level the vast majority of children really do not even notice the differences that adults make such a big deal about.

saadia thank you, that helps. have you volunteerd in many schools?

I don't see that being part of 25% is a problem at all. If it were 1% I'd give it some thought though. If it were me I wouldn't want to be the only white child, the only black child, the only athiest child, the only religous or the only poor child.

And yes some black children do find themselves in that position and we have to work hard to prevent them being excluded/bullied because of it don't we.

Are you seriously telling me that the 75% you are referring to as black african are just that i.e. not black british. Because in your last post you referred to "HIGH percentage with english as a second language".

Even if that were the case (and I don't actually believe you), the school must offer a fantastic education given that it gets better results with the vast majoirty (according to you) of children taking tests in their second language. Way to go!

'jeez all people see is colour'

WHAT ABOUT THE TITLE OF THE THREAD???!

yes it was tough at times but is that so bad? Life is tough, the work place is tough and multicultural, I didnt want to be stuck with the few other white kids all the time so I worked at making other friends and learnt about building friendships across cultural divides and even learnt some zulu which is a great party trick. I learnt more social skills then if I had been sent somewhere where it was easy for me to fit right in straight away.

I do understand your concern, but I dont think it is reason enough for your kid not go there. I think you SHOULD be allowed to voice your concern if it is in the context of how to facilitate your kids transition into a more multicultural environment than he's used to.

I think it is wrong to be afraid to discuss the challenges that multiculturalism provides. Ignoring them in fear of being called racist does nothing to actually overcome them and help children have a GOOD multicultural experience rather than a bad one

No, just one school, in a fairly deprived area, with a huge number of recently arrived children who have English as a second language. I have been in three Y3 classes and they all do seem to get along very well and even care about each other.

yes they probally do speak english fluently, but im think that your first langauge is probally the easier one to naturally speak in? especailly for young kids, even more so if the first langauge is used more at home than english.

appreciate the posts from ppl giving me their experiances from being in such schools, and also from adults perspectives.

and yes i should have posted this in education..

you are a flipping idiot

Now I felt your op was more misguided than racist but you're digging yourself in a hole now. I would definitely send my children to the better results school if it had more children with EAL than the other school. Lots and lots of white children with EAL at the moment though...

I am black. My child is black. We were born in this county. We are intelligent, have good jobs and a nice house.

Why do you think that the black people (parents and children) you will encounter at the other school will be so different or have such different aspirations to your own.

YOu are racist - there is no other way of seeing this.

thank you SalBySea

no, you shouldn't have posted it at all.

you should have written to your local BNP member moaning about the fatc that your lovely local school is being over run by "immigrants"

seriously i am astounded that you Still dont see this as a racial issue