Ewwww! Somebody at toddlers offered me her breast milk!!!!!!

[thisismynewname]

So my sister bought me tickets to see a dance show and I was telling someone at toddlers that I didn't think I could go as I can't express and DS is b/f.

She only went and offered me some of her expressed milk from the freezer, I'm not joking!!! I didn't know where to put myself, lol!

Muttered something about giving the expressing another go, freak!! I knew she was a bit weird, I'm 99 per cent suire she still feeds her 4 yr old DS, but this is beyoned the pale isn't it?

"but the woman offering her bm could have been drinking vodka all morning (ok not likely but you never know). "

Surely you'd smell it on her?

"Anyway, cow's milk is fine for babies,"

No it's not, it's nutritionally and immunilogically inferor and increases risks of several conditions including diabetes!

I always find it amusing the opinions on bf a four year old. Negative opinions always seem to come from people who have no experience or knowledge but believe they do! Especially the comment about it being someones 'thing'. As if! Just because you breastfeed a child it doesnt mean it's the thing that defines you and is what you are all about. No one would ever say that if you ff a 4 year old it must be your 'thing'.

The people who actually have experience and knowledge of normal term breastfeeding are I believe never negative about it.

As for the ewww. When my five year old uses that term I always get her to actually explain what she means properly.

My sister was in a car accident a couple months ago as was my 3 month old nephew. My nephew was fine, my sister had to stay in hospital overnight. She asked me if I would mind having my nephew overnight and if I would mind feeding him (at the time my dd was 8 weeks old). It didn't seem odd in the slightest to me. My nephew came home with me and I tandem fed with my dd. Without it he would have gone hungry.

So OP is that gross or weird or disgusting?

Having someone elses breastmilk for my dc is not something I would accept, purely because the thought of it makes me feel queasy.

I realise it would be fine to do and also understand fully why others have accepted this in certain circumstances,

Each to their own.

so accepting a cows milk that has been excessively processed is ok, but accepting another bumans milk is not?
sounds hypocritical to me.

was that to me stitch?

I am fine with the cows milk but just the thought of someone elses breast milk for mine honestly makes me feel sick.

Have said I can understand certain reasons that other people do it and not said they shouldnt either, it is just something i personally cannot get my head round.

Sorry if i have offended anyone, wanst meant to be like that. Just my own stance.

I would have accepted ...and then asked her if she'd mind being screened for HIV and Hep C...just like they do for donated milk to hospitals

As a mother whose own prem baby was given another mother's EBM by mistake (huge mistake imo) I wasn't grateful after the event.

Forever cleaning. I appreciate what you said, although personally I would choose another womans breastmilk over formula.
Everyone is entitled to their opinion as long as they are not deliberately offensive as the OP chose to be.

oh ok, no certainly wasnt trying to offend those that either offer it or accept. They all have their own valid reasons for doing so, and would agree with johnworf about the risks of other peoples breastmilk.

Goodness, OP, what a fuss over nothing.

Lynette - cows could be on antibiotics or other drugs. Not so long ago (1989) it was discovered that cows had been eating other cow's brains, despite all the rules and regulations. Can we really be so sure that now all farmed animals are eating a pure and healthy diet?

Organic doesn't mean no additives to feed at all - just those approved by the Soil Association, ie far fewer than if not organic.

Your faith in cows and farming is touching, if naive.

ps OP - I once offered my own breast to an 18 mo child I was babysitting - he wanted milk and I couldn't find any in the fridge. The parents had showed me the bottle but not where the milk was. Didn't work so I phoned the parents and they told me the milk was in the cupboard - UHT.

Its surprising what is in certain foods and drinks, things you would not expect.
For eg, Fanta, Lilt and Kia-Ora are not suitable for vegetarians as they contain fish gelatine.
Everytime I open the fridge at work and see a bottle of Fanta, I'm too repulsed to reach for it.
Some foods contain stuff you would not expect which is not dangerous, just not that nice (food colouring made from insects anybody)

no forever, just a reply to the original post. havent read the rest of the thread, beyond a few posts.
i try to stay away from breast bottle threads as they get very overheated

I don't think the poor woman was a freak, she was trying to be kind and help you.
Although I would not have wanted anyone giving my children their breast milk.

Greenmonkies Cow's milk is fine for babies. Whether in formula or not. Just not as beneficial as bm. Obviously.

LaVie

It really depends on your interpretation of 'fine'!

Okay, round 1 over...step to your respectable corners and I'm going to ask a stupid question (takes aim at those that donate breastmilk).
Do they screen when you donate?
I really want to know because they do when you donate blood. Right (stay with me here). When you are bfing they tell you NOT to take some drugs because you may pass it on.
Soooo my question is do they screen before taking the donations?
I've known people that donated blood but didn't realize they shouldn't have.
Isn't it the same with donating bm?

After answering, then back into the ring DING DING...
and thanks for the answer to my question.

My opinion to the original post. I think she was offering to be helpful.
If you were starving on a streetcorner (living under a bridge whatever) and someone offered you something...a sandwiche, a half eaten meal, I guess it would depend on you whether or not to accept it or not.
Regardless of your choice it doesn't make the offer anything less and if you said thank you or no thank you it doesn't make you less of a person.
I think the problem is your speculation of how old her child is that she is still breastfeeding. That is where the arguments are going to start.

I too donated for a year to the prem unit at St Mary's they collected it with gratitude, perhaps the lady in question was being generous and kind not freaky. I have also fed my sisters child so that she could sleep through I was caring for my grand daughter whilst her bf mum was out enjoying a row on a lake on their hols... her dd woke and would not be consoled with a bottle, I eyed with envy a lady nearby who was bf her daughter and I would have loved her to offer to feed her. Its natural, wet nurses have been around since time began, its not wierd.

Okay, must admit I jumped from page 1 to 7...these threads fly anyway. I read up 7 to John worf and see the hospitals screen. Do the bm banks? Are they like donating blood and they get you on a roll and ask you not to eat certain foods?
So reactions don't happen...you know to allergic babies?

I know when you have a baby in the states (may just be the hospital I used over 20 years ago) they ask you if you are allergic to anything food or medications.
I was just wondering as your baby could have the same allergies are the mother (75% chance of passing on). So do they screen the donating mothers? Get them on a list and make sure they are eating only the prescribed foods?
Maybe it just sounds stupid. I know there are restaurants here in Texas that my husband asks them not to put cinnamon in his coffee drink or in the butter for the rolls.
I'm allergic to everything but certain peppers seem to make me break out worse than others.

An extract from www.breastfeedingsupport.co.uk

"What are the guidelines for donating?

Guidelines published by the United Kingdom Association for Milk Banking recommend that breastmilk donors should be healthy non-smokers, not using drugs or taking regular medication - although donors can take the progesterone only contraceptive pill and use asthma inhalers, if necessary. They should drink only occasional small amounts of alcohol and have a low daily caffeine intake. Donations must stop if the woman develops mastitis or rubella or recently had a rubella vaccination.

The first donation must be within six months of starting breastfeeding, and the last within 12 months.

Prior to acceptance, donors are screened via bloodtest for a number of infections that may be passed on via breastmilk. These include HIV, hepatitis B and C, syphilis and a rare condition called HTLV. It is also recommended that follow up blood tests are performed three months after stopping donating. In addition all donations of breastmilk are screened for bacteria and are not used if there are too many bacteria or any harmful ones and all donated breastmilk in the UK is heat treated. This is because although a mother's milk is ideal for her own baby, extra care needs to be taken with tiny or sick babies."

Of course, if someone you didn't know that well (or even did know well) asked you if you would like them to give your baby one of their bodily fluids, I hope you'd seriously consider before taking it