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AIBU?

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Original poster

Ewwww! Somebody at toddlers offered me her breast milk!!!!!!

211 replies

thisismynewname · 24/10/2008 20:13

So my sister bought me tickets to see a dance show and I was telling someone at toddlers that I didn't think I could go as I can't express and DS is b/f.

She only went and offered me some of her expressed milk from the freezer, I'm not joking!!! I didn't know where to put myself, lol!

Muttered something about giving the expressing another go, freak!! I knew she was a bit weird, I'm 99 per cent suire she still feeds her 4 yr old DS, but this is beyoned the pale isn't it?

OP posts:
ToThrottleABlackBird · 25/10/2008 10:41

This isnt a row about cows milk or formula though. If you all read the original op, and most of the responses, you will see that it is the ewwww and calling her a freak that has got up people's back. Fair enough, her heart was in the right place, she thought she would be doing the op a favour but there was no need for the reaction of the op. I for one am not a fan of extended bf but I do not call anyone a freak if the chose to do so.

BananaSkin · 25/10/2008 12:55

Noooooooo - not breastfeeding a four year old! I hope you reported her to social services.

I too thought she was offering it to the OP, in her tea or something - now that, I agree, would be a bit ewwwww!

LynetteScavo · 25/10/2008 12:58

I would have accepted. After making sure she she was taking no drugs of any type, and only ate organic food.

Elasticwoman · 25/10/2008 13:00

Lynette - like you can verify that all the cows whose milk you drink take no drugs and eat organic?

Lotster · 25/10/2008 13:02

Oh give over. This really goes too far.

ShowOfHands · 25/10/2008 13:10

I'm thoroughly disappointed by this thread. I thought somebody had wapped out a boob and waved it in the OP's face. Actually it's just ignorant trolling.

Yah boo sucks.

meandmyjoe · 25/10/2008 13:19

Really tired, tb is curable with simple anti biotics. HIV isn't. I don't know anyone who would actually think a baby drinking bodily fluid from a stranger would be a good idea.

Star1ightExpress · 25/10/2008 13:55

Oh dear...... I wanna offer bm to my friend but now.....

Actually I'll start my own thread, - this one is rotten!

LynetteScavo · 25/10/2008 15:07

Elastic woman - I only use organic milk, so I hope the cows only eat organic food. - And I presume the cows haven't been taking any A-class drugs.

mummag · 25/10/2008 15:47

i would be really shocked if anyone offered breast milk to me, and i breastfed for a long time with each of my kids. I think the choice of words was unfortunate ie freak but i would find it most disconcerting even if a close friend offered some to me... which they never would cos its something that wouldnt occur to us.. sorry if that offends anyone. I would have turned down politely which i am sure is what the op did and came on here to unload at something she thought a little odd.

ToThrottleABlackBird · 25/10/2008 18:09

She called her a freak, which, imho, was bang out of order to do. End of.

mummag · 25/10/2008 18:49

people use the word relatively frequently in conversation without intending it to be all that offensive.... you must know what i mean...

Peachy · 25/10/2008 18:54

I'd have been surprised yes- you don't get that sort of offer often

But I would have turned it down in grateful thanks (partly bcause baby causes me to have a resticted diet due to his intolerances) and been aware how kind she was to offer me something purely to help me enjoy myself on a ight out.

As for feeding her child at 4- why not if you want?

kslatts · 25/10/2008 19:00

You explained to her that you couldn't go to the show your sisiter had bought tickets for, and she kindly offered you some of her expressed milk, I don't see what your problem is.

pamelat · 25/10/2008 19:05

Surprised is definately a better term.

I wouldnt accept it. I think there is often an "ownership" thing going on, along the lines of MY baby will drink MY milk (or formula). I would feel a little envious if my DD had someone elses breast milk, expressed or otherwise. I wanted to be the one to provide for her, must be some maternal instinct thing.

I know its different if you are unable to feed your baby yourself

I think it was sweet of her (any idea how long it takes and how difficult it is) but I would also have politely declined.

pamelat · 25/10/2008 19:10

Do you think that some of our responses of "yuck" of another humans milk (incl mine) versus cows milk or whatever, comes down to a rival type instinct?

I don't feel threatened by a cow (unless there are lots of them and I am walking a dog in their field )

I really would feel threatened somehow if my baby had someone elses breast milk, more so if she fed directly (its such a bonding experience IMO) but even expressed I wouldnt be comfortable

I say this as someone who did breast feed, then partially formula and now fully formula (DD 9 months)

PERSONALLY, I would not feed an older child from breast milk. I don't even consider myself "pro" breast feeding, just wanted to try to give DD the best start, struggled on for 6 months but was happy to get to that.

GreenMonkies · 25/10/2008 19:20

Well, I am tandem nursing a 2 year old and a 5 year old, and I have a bag of milk in the back of my freezer thats only a year or so old, would you like it??

Incidently, in the OP you say your sister has bought you tickets for a dance show, then, later when someone asks if you would be happy to accept ebm from your sister you say you don't have a sister.

Trip Trap, off you jolly well fuck, back under your bridge!!

(I wouldn't take ebm from a stranger, but I would from someone I knew well)

GreenMonkies · 25/10/2008 19:23

(by the way, my milk is "clean" I donated to the local milk bank, so I was thoroughly screened)

mummag · 25/10/2008 19:36

i also think that breasfeeding a child till four is quite odd, but i seem to be in the minority with that view here. Which is odd cos i have never met anyone in real life who thinks that it isnt odd!! i know a lot of you will feel that i am wrong.

ToThrottleABlackBird · 25/10/2008 20:06

Mummag, fair dos, but would you actually call her a freak for doing so?
Her child, her choice.

wonderpetsmum · 25/10/2008 20:37

can i just say my DD was born 12 weeks early and i wouldnt of liked her to of been given somebody else bm - mine sadly dried up and she was given a presciptive milk and she is now a gobby 5 year old
she went to another hospital for a procedue where there had a milk bank - i was horrified.
Sorry..

nooOOOoonki · 25/10/2008 20:43

wonderpet - sorry that is just strange, so quite happy for your baby to be given another animals milk but not another humans

(I have no problems re ff - I did a mix) but that I do not understand.

GreenMonkies · 25/10/2008 20:44

WonderPetsMum, so, screened, pasturised milk from a fellow human mum horrifies you, but modified milk from cows, which carries all kinds of risks is ok?

I don't understand!!!!!

LaVie · 25/10/2008 20:47

but the woman offering her bm could have been drinking vodka all morning (ok not likely but you never know).

Anyway, cow's milk is fine for babies, it's just not as good as their mother's bm.

Bit harsh to call her a freak though, she was obviously just trying to help.

Reallytired · 26/10/2008 08:25

wonderpetsmum,

Surely a dead premie is more yuck than a premie having human breastmilk. I was told that 28 week premie having human breastmilk doubles its chances of surival and reduces the chances of it getting brain damage.

Human breastmilk saves premies lives. Anyway Queen Charolottes and I assume all other milk banks pasturise milk. I had to undergo 6 blood tests before they accepted my milk as well as answering questions on my lifestyle. The cost of processing human breastmilk is astronomical.

I really think the risks to the premies of having my breastmilk were very low.

Out of curiousity do you object to premie babies being given blood transfusions. The risks of having donated blood is far higher than that of breastmilk.

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