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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think it is out of order taking 4 maternity leaves in a row from the same employer?

208 replies

bodybag · 21/09/2008 21:08

this woman, i am supposed to work with has barly been there in 6 years!

don't you think it's a bit out of order from the same employer to have to cover all that for 1 person?

OP posts:
ethanchristopher · 21/09/2008 23:01

erm same thing is it not???

what exactly am i being thick about by the way? not getting your hidden sarcasm?

sorry about that.......

anyway whatever

your entitled to your opinions

im off to watch dexter

i may reply in the addies

Ronaldinhio · 21/09/2008 23:02

Is it just me or has this thread become even more weird than before???

WilfSell · 21/09/2008 23:03
ethanchristopher · 21/09/2008 23:04

im holding up two at you...

WilfSell · 21/09/2008 23:05

Oh I'm hurt now.

KristinaM · 21/09/2008 23:05

is it still school holidays? or do they not give much homework in the first few weeks back?

ethanchristopher · 21/09/2008 23:06

sorry

oh no wait

that was that sarcasm again wasnt it

whatever

WilfSell · 21/09/2008 23:07

You're catching on now. You can be my slave acolyte if you like. I'll train you up in evil and suffragett, er, -ism.

Klaw · 21/09/2008 23:07

bless.... my lady I doulad for posted a lovely post about me on MN earlier

Am considering my 3rd sambuca tonight, seeing as I can...

ethanchristopher · 21/09/2008 23:08

KM - what you mean acheiving my straight A grades in my GCSE's of which i've already received one and also with a child

yay - oh wait hang on.. whats your policy on maternity leave?

TheHedgeWitch · 21/09/2008 23:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Klaw · 21/09/2008 23:09

feck I'm on the wrong thread, sorry first time that's ever happened!

more

AnotherFineMess · 21/09/2008 23:10

Awww, WilfSell, I like your posts a lot on other threads so I feel obliged to step in here and try to add another perspective - I think some of the misunderstanding has come from ec's uncle employing women comment - someone commented it was a bit suss that he was only employing young women (ie - to be surrounded by young women) and ec agreed that he was stupid for doing that (I think), not that he was stupid for employing women of childbearing age.

It's all gone Pete Tong cos WS thought EC was being discriminatory, but I don't think she meant that. And EC consistently posts as a young mum who is articulate and thoughtful, so I don't think she deserves a pasting.

OP does though.

Ronaldinhio · 21/09/2008 23:10

Perhaps the subtle nuances of Mumsnet are being lost on one so freshfaced...?

WilfSell · 21/09/2008 23:11
Ronaldinhio · 21/09/2008 23:12

Sorry thats bollox on my part

ethanchristopher · 21/09/2008 23:12

another fine mess has cleared up the whole misunderstanding

TheHedgeWitch · 21/09/2008 23:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

WilfSell · 21/09/2008 23:14

Am I being mean now? I was trying to be funny and not malicious with my last few posts actually, just gently chiding. And nuanced.

I apologise if I sounded mean. I have had a stroppy weekend.

floaty · 21/09/2008 23:14

If you have a personal pension her children may be working to pay your pension.Personal pension schemems invest in shares ,her children may well be working in the compnies your pension scheme invests in they my be working in other industries which cause the stockmarket to rise and your pension scheme to increase in value,they may well be the doctors or nurses who look after you when you are ill,they may serve you at the supermarket or mend your car.

That said ,I do think that the maernity rules are difficult for small employers to accomodate.

ethanchristopher · 21/09/2008 23:15

but i am downright bitchy a la school playground....

it got bitchy after i took offence to being called stupid because i thought id put my point across clearly

sorry ws if i offended you..

WilfSell · 21/09/2008 23:16

You didn't offend me. I was teasing you on purpose because I thought it might make you think about what you were saying. Perhaps I did misunderstand your comment.

TheHedgeWitch · 21/09/2008 23:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

ethanchristopher · 21/09/2008 23:18

you see... im really not so good with the sarcasm

and fuckety fuck

ive missed the first 15 mins of the last episode of dexter.

dam

Joolyjoolyjoo · 21/09/2008 23:54

I find it a bit depressing that people feel this way about mat leave, tbh. I work for a small business- I've been there 8 yrs and have just returned after my 3rd lot of mat leave.

My boss (who is usually a real tightwad) has been fine about it. He told me that he prefers to employ females (nothing suspicious, he just finds us easier to work with, having had a bad experience with a male em,ployee), and he prefers to employ people with experience, so it's not a great shock that we would want to have a family. He told me that it hardly costs him anything (and he gets someone in to cover my hours) as he recoups most of it.

From his point of view he has longterm employees who will often step up and go above and beyond their job description. I have never taken any time off during pregnancy, other than one week where I was hospitalised for a potential blood clot in my chest. I know people who are not pregnant who have taken months and months off work with stress and stress-related illnesses- should they be ashamed of themselves too?

We also have another colleague on mat leave at the moment, and her replacement is turning out to be far from satisfactory, but we don't blame our pregnant colleague- it is our boss's problem. I do think if you are so resentful at your work maybe YOU had better find somewhere else, maybe somewhere that constructively dismisses pregnant women. And then hope you never need to take mat leave