To hate it when people call my son's hair red?

[CuppaTeaJanice]

The one thing I didn't want to pass on if I had a boy was my red hair! I hated it as a kid, but I don't mind it now if I have it long and wear black mascara. It's worse for a boy - all the redheaded boys I knew suffered years of teasing and humiliation.

Thankfully, he (mostly) got his dad's brown hair. DS's hair has a hint of red in the sunshine. I like to call it 'strawberry brown'.

So why do so many people say 'ooh, he's going to have your colouring' like that's a compliment! Is red (or red-tinged) hair now a good thing for a boy to have? Or do brown/blonde/blackheads compare it to their own hair and call it red, even though his hair is clearly brown?

I've got red hair - I love it and loved the attention it brought me as a child

If you call it "strawberry brown" aren't you giving him the impression that there's something wrong with it?

I am currently sitting under a cap of red-enhancing henna as I write.

My DD aged 17 months has beautiful red curly hair. Out of my 4 she has the must beautiful hair,she is the only one of them to be this colour. Her hair colour doesnt bother me but the fact that people feel the need to comment on it. They never did on the other 3

several of my cousins have the most gorgeous red hair possible. one has luscious curly red hair and its to die for. its absolutly stunning.

even some of dh family have red hair, and so far none of mine do, who knows, myab e dd4 will get those gorgeous red curls i wanted. but the red seems to skip generations for us.

My son has ginger hair...not red, not strawberry blonde/brown, not auburn...it's ginger or perhaps orange if you like...

He hasn't inherited it directly from me or my partner although we both have ginger haired ancestors from generations ago. And he has a tonne of freckles, but very deep brown eyes.

My daughter (son's twin sister) is blonde, so my son is the only ginger in our family. People have always complimented his hair, whether they have been sincere or not, and he is actually quite proud of it!

When he started school last year I was amazed at the amount of ginger haired children in his year group..out of 90 children about 15 of them had ginger hair. My son come home a bit disappointed and said "Mummy why are there so many boys that look like me!!!!?"

I do think that he may get teased at school for his hair colour and his freckles, simply because no child goes through school without being teased and if it wasn't that it would be something else. I am sure my daughter will be teased for being short and skinny - it is part of growing up. And if he hates it when he's an adult at least he can dye it!

I think Geordie Minx has offered sound advice on how to handle your paranoias...make sure your son has a backbone and can shrug off any teasing! Try not to let your experiences rub off onto your son...teach him to be confident and proud!

My hair used to be the same color as copper wire, as I have aged it has turned into a lovely shade of auburn. I actually miss the copper color though as it was very distinctive. I used to get teased at school but people pay a small fortune to try and get their hair the same color as mine and it never looks as good. Give him pride in his coloring and help boost his confidence so he can deal with anything petty kids can throw at him. Remember that children will always tease each other about something but if they don't get a tearful or violent response they lose interest.

My 7 week DD already has a head of lovely red hair and really hoping it stays! It's a beautiful hair colour

I have red hair and was teased mercilessly at school for it. This is probably due to my own paranoia regarding my colourly which, my family, added to with great mirth. I was part of a step-family and was the only one with red hair and greeny/brown eyes. The rest were brown haired and blue eyed. There were endless jokes about me being the milkman's daughter etc etc. Naturally, this did not give me much confidence in my looks and colouring. Needless to say, I was a nervous wreck at school everytime someone mentioned my hair and used to blush furiously at the drop of a hat.

These days, I am red and bloody well proud of it. My beautiful DD is 11 months old and has strawberry blonde hair (blond hair with a hint of lovely red). She is gorgeous and delightful and I will never let up in telling her so.

OP, unless you change your tune regarding your son's colouring, you will give him cause for concern and a lack of confidence.

My DD has auburn ringlets and I've never seen so many people smiling as when i take her out. And they are different colours in different lights and different seasons. I have brown hair and am astonished to have produced something so beautiful. I think the attitude to red hair must have changed - DD's hair is widely admired...

Elizabeth 1st, Henry 8th...

I love my red hair! My 3 sisters also have red hair (although neither parent did, nor our brother - hence many jokes at his exprense about being left by the travelling circus!). Mum (naturally blonde) even dyed her hair red once to try to fit in!

It's also a great way of teaching kids about genetics and inheritance (obviously when they get a little older).

What's so bad about it - people say we are 'firey', passionate and wild (OK so they also say bad-tempered but if they do I always say 'only when people generalise about my hair colour').

Why be blonde when the assumption is that you are 'dumb'?
Or brown when you are called 'mousey'?
Or black - which is everyday?

I once read that every top female star of the 30s - 50s dabbled with red-headedness. Think of the poster for Gilda - has there ever been a better ad for red hair?

Kids will tease on any basis - fat, thin, glasses, big nose, sticky out ears, not being good at sports..... Such is life. They are just jealous!

And don't call me 'Ginger' - yeuch. And for the record "If I had a 'carrot-top' I'd have GREEN' hair" (how many times have I said that!?

So is it terrible to tell your child that he has ginger hair, if said in a positive way? DS2 (18mths) has very gingery coloured hair - the orange end of strawberry blond. To me it's not red, red-headed is more of an auburn colour.

We have been referring to his hair colour as ginger but I recently started to wonder if we ought be calling it red? Or if we call it ginger at home and tell him how beautiful it is (and it is gorgeous!) will he then not be upset when the other kids tell him he's ginger at school?

I have red hair too and I love it

I am actually pretty annoyed that neither of my children look as though they're going to have it too

I used to say simlar to you Malory.....!

I've got red hair.
DH has very very blond hair.

I was sure my hair colour genes would over power his but no, both DS's have very blond hair too.

I was quite sad. Red hair on children is gorgeous!

and I hate the phrase 'strawberry blond', its smacks of 'I'm trying to pretend I dont have ginger hair'
Strawberry brown is surely even worse.

Just call it ginger and be done with it.

Only read the OP but if someone seems to be giving you, or your child, a compliment, what on earth is the problem?

If they said "oh god I hope he doesn't end up with your hideous red hair" then fair enough, I would be annoyed.

BTW, I have what I would call brown hair, and have had many many comments on my ginger or red hair. In one job I had my nickname was "ginge" but it made me laugh rather than anything else, esp as it was said affectionately.

my dd (12mths) has what I have always called ginger hair - never knew what the problem was. I love it, think it's beautiful, mainly i think because she is so different in colouring from me (brown skin, brown hair). People have called it auburn, red, strawberry blond and ginger but all of them have loved it. I'm confused as to what I should call it now!!!

DD is ginger, people always comment on the colour of her hair, I love it and think she'll look gorgeous when she's older and does her eye make-up. (not that she doesn't look gorgeous now of course but she dressed up as a flapper girl once and I was amazed at how much her eyes stood out)

I hate the term 'ginger' and never use it for any of my red-haired dc or myself. I had auburn hair as a child and loathed the attention it seemed to attract. I wasn't teased that much at school, probably because a girl with bright red hair took the brunt of that, but I was sensitive about it. I am now brown-haired, which is much more comfortable for me.

My dc have different colours of red-hair. Ds2 had bright red curls but is now dark-haired. Dd1 calls her hair ginger while dd2 has chestnut brown hair. Ds2 and dd1 got loads of comments, esp dd1 as her hair was waist-length, but dd2's waist-length hair attracts no attention at all.

I don't get the 'strawberry blonde' thing at all. Everyone I've ever met who claims to be that colour has red hair, imo!!

Both of my dd are red - the eldest is darker, more auburn, but still a beautiful colour.
The yougest has a mop of ginger curls (and a temper to match) and people love to talk to me and her about her hair. She gets bored with it now but I still like it when old people come up to me and say "Ooooh, I used to have hair like that!)

Have just added a photo of them both on my profile.....

My hair was carrot red when born - I wish it still was. It is red with bits of blonde and gingery now. I was sure my DD would have red hair - it is blonde but my DS (4 weeks old) has very red (orange) hair and I am very proud. I ADORE red hair, no matter what sex, the only thing is I do dislike when it is accompanied by billions of freckles everywhere. We all get teased about something at school - kids are horrid it is a fact.

Stirling - your girls are gorgeous.

Aww Stirling your DDs are beautiful - ringlets so cute. I am in Stirling too [wave emoticon]

I have "strawberry blonde" hair, - so blonde with reddish highlights. I have dyed it every colour under the sun, no because I didn't like it, but because I like change.
DH has black hair.
DD was born with black hair, now she is a reddish blonde. She has my natural colour but DH's fine hair rather than my all over the place thick hair.

TBH it doesn't bother me what colour hair people have!

Thank you - I love their hair and always wanted red hair - mine is more very dark auburn (with touches of grey now!!)

{waves at Rumpel!! - I am just going down to the Thistles centre - shall wave at everyone}