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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to secretly think that my wedding was better then other people's?

109 replies

moulesfrites · 27/07/2008 20:21

Got married 6 months ago. Been to a few friends' weddings this summer and so far get really annoyed at myself when instead of focusing on the bride and groom's happiness I find myself momentarily lapsing and considering minor details like entrance music, orders of service, dress etc and thinking "ours was nicer". Does this make me a terrible person or is it natural? I suppose it's a good job that I liked my own wedding!

OP posts:
posieflump · 27/07/2008 20:21

it's natural
over time you will probably forget a bit though

BreeVanderCampLGJ · 27/07/2008 20:22

It makes you terribly shallow. IMO

snowleopard · 27/07/2008 20:23

I haven't had a wedding, but I definitely rate them all in my head and compare them. So I can't blame you, I'm sure I'd do the same. Also weddings can draaaaag on - you've got to think about something.

Twiglett · 27/07/2008 20:23

god I don't think that's a natural thing at all .. how odd

nickytwotimes · 27/07/2008 20:24

Dead shallow.
Weddings are a load of old crap.

Of course, mine was fantastic.

Califrau · 27/07/2008 20:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DorrisMcWhirter · 27/07/2008 20:24

Nah, not terrible, but not necessarily right either!
Theirs was more them, yours was more you.

Yorky · 27/07/2008 20:33

Don't know if its right or wrong, but if you're shallow then so am I . Our wedding was fantastic, apart from me refusing to come down with flu until the day after and no wedding I've been to in the four years since has been as good - but hopefully they feel the same about their own day

Carmenere · 27/07/2008 20:36

I just don't get this competitive wedding malarkey

WideWebWitch · 27/07/2008 20:38

you sad person
a wedding isn't about THE DAY
it's aobut getting married to a person

staryeyed · 27/07/2008 20:38

Surely the wedding day is about them not you.

FioFio · 27/07/2008 20:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

nooka · 27/07/2008 20:39

So long as you don't go around saying so, I don't see it as a problem. It's good that you enjoyed your wedding! I think as time passes you may find your momentary lapses get more sentimental, and more about how you felt rather than the details, but not spending 100% of the time thinking about the bride and groom is I think perfectly normal.

expatinscotland · 27/07/2008 20:39

How weird!

I'm usually too drunk to care/remember.

FioFio · 27/07/2008 20:40

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Message withdrawn

expatinscotland · 27/07/2008 20:42

My dress trumps ALL of yours:

damnilookedgood

callmeovercautious · 27/07/2008 20:42

But if the OP had said "I think my baby is the best in the world" then she/he would be right. Because the things that are precious to you are the "best" version ever.

Cies · 27/07/2008 20:49

I agree with OP's sentiment.

I think my wedding was the best, because it was what I and DH chose, we did what we wanted and it was the day we got married.

Having said that, I have really enjoyed all the other weddings I've been to. Each one has been different, and has reflected the couple getting married to a T.

barnsleybelle · 27/07/2008 20:51

What a fantastically wonderfully honest thread. I love it!!! Of course yanbu. However, i have to say MINE was the best wedding in the world tho!!! We got married on a gazebo in Central Park NYC, with our closest family and friends with us.

I loved the honesty of your thread. Proper funny.

PS i know it's all about the marriage blah blah blah...... But seriously, try and top mine!!!

FluffyMummy123 · 27/07/2008 20:52

Message withdrawn

ScottishMummy · 27/07/2008 20:52

do you often swim in lake me-me-me.you went to friends wedding and thought about yourself

being married is about being supportive couple
not comparing wedding fripperies

SorenLorensen · 27/07/2008 20:52

My wedding day was crap - so every wedding I've ever been to has been better than that

preggersplayspop · 27/07/2008 20:52

I hope you didn't come to my wedding, I wouldn't like to think my guests were looking so critically at things. They should be concentrating on getting drunk, having a good time and being happy for the bride and groom! I didn't want my marriage to be defined by my wedding day.

FluffyMummy123 · 27/07/2008 20:53

Message withdrawn

somersetmum · 27/07/2008 20:55

My wedding wasn't brilliant. There were no fancy cars or morning suits. It threw it down with rain. We didn't have printed Orders of Service, favours on the table or other finishing touches.
But it was fabulous, because I married my dh and we will soon be celebrating 18 happy years. My guests all enjoyed themselves as much as we did and that is all that matters.