to secretly think that my wedding was better then other people's?

[moulesfrites]

Got married 6 months ago. Been to a few friends' weddings this summer and so far get really annoyed at myself when instead of focusing on the bride and groom's happiness I find myself momentarily lapsing and considering minor details like entrance music, orders of service, dress etc and thinking "ours was nicer". Does this make me a terrible person or is it natural? I suppose it's a good job that I liked my own wedding!

It must be awful to be still paying for the wedding when you've split up. That would really hurt.

aye MC statement for canapés etc dropping through letterbox when kaboosh your actually divorced

ouch

Crikey, I've only been to two weddings.
The first was my Parent's when I was 7, I hated my shoes, the second was my brother's when I was 19, I thought his wife's dress was awful and the wedding was boring.
I'm invited to my brother's wedding (same brother, 2nd marriage)next May and I'm already planning to have Flu/Chicken Pox/Mumps/Beubonic Plague nearer the time so I don't have to go.

To the OP YANBU, I would hope you do like your wedding best, it's meant to be the best day of your life.
So long as you are happy for the couple, enjoy yourself and don't act all sneery of course

Seven years after my wedding, I still think it was the best wedding that I've ever been to. It wasn't the most expensive or lavish wedding I've attended, decidedly average in terms of size, cost etc ... but all the decisions I made were the ones that I wanted... For example, I had a blue theme because that is my favourite colour. Therefore, it is highly unlikely that I would prefer a wedding themed on green say, when I hate the colour green. My wedding had my choices, and obviously they were the best choices for me... because I had exactly what I wanted. If other people choose the choices I rejected, then it follows that I'm not going to like them as much. Its not saying that they are worse choices, but I'm not going to enjoy them as much, because its not what I would have chosen. But then, isn't that what makes the world go round???

I think everybody thinks their own wedding is the best.

Of course your wedding was better. For you. You chose everything about it. It's just like thinking your DC are better-looking, more advanced and more loveable than everyone else's: perfectly natural to feel it but saying it (well, apart from on MN) will make people think you are a nob.

Who bloody well cares.
Weddings are crap and boring and are an indicator of the same crap boring marriage ahead.

Unreasonable. Vulgar. And trivial. For goodness sake!

PMSL @ smurfgirl

"Everyone on MN is arsey about weddings and everyone posts about how you should get married in the rain in a bog in jeans because then you truely love each other so you will get no sympathy for killing yourself for a year trying to make it look fabby."

Yeah and they also like to go on as if anyone who organises their wedding spends their time worrying about chair coverings and matching their bridesmaid's hair to the colour of the wallpaper in the hotel.

What is so wrong with planning a big fuck off party for all your family and friends?

If there is time in life to go to fancy dress parties dressed up as a the table from Delicatessen the there is time to organise a wedding.

I think the key word in the title is "secretly". Having secret thoughts about how nice your own wedding was and admitting that online in a good humoured way is less wanky that whining on about how weddings are "only one day".

Yes one day that is filled with booze, cousins, dancing, high-heeled shoes and some mad ladies with feathers stapled to the sides of their heads. The best possible kind of day.

I love weddings

Can I still hate them and have buebonic plague/hideous catching worms/nits from hell and worse so I don't have to attend my brother's second wedding?
I do believe it'll be about 1 family member from our side and a whole bunch of her side that have flown over from Australia.
I also believe my brother thinks it's a good idea to move to Australia with his new wife, have a family and forget he has a son.
I believe this as he's said so much!
We're not close, never have been but I find that unforgivable and even if I had the money to attend the wedding, I don't want to on principle

Oooh no, do not attend.

My cousin got married on Friday, and I didn't even bother to inform him that I wasn't coming.

He's 45 years old, and he asked for money .. in a rhyme

Fucking unforgiveable! I hate weddings anyway. I make it my life's work to be uninvited.

Moules ... I hope you get over it. I really do.

Was that to me Desdiderata?
If so, I can't bring myself to go to the wedding, what my brother wants to do disgusts me.
If it wasn't, sorry for boring you!

Only in the same way that we all think our baby is more beautiful than all others.

I did tell my friend that her dh's funeral was the best I had ever been to - but I know her well and he had been planning it for 18 years - and it was a compliment.

I doubt she will sit through other people's funerals thinking her dh's was better though.

Well I for one love weddings. They fill me with joy and hope that humanity can see beyond the base and vulgar and for one brief day rise above the shite that floats past us in our daily liveas, and you get a right good feed and piss p, who gives a toss if the commonon fuckers split up next week. At least I got a knee trembelr by Aunty Gladys behind the fire exit

I always think my groom was nicer than any other groom I have seen. Which is kind of handy really.

Agree with smurfgirl ... and I never understand why some sour old bagspeople on MN hate weddings so much ...

Because Ghosty, people wear satin meringues, have crap food, sit their sister where she knows no one and is taken the piss out of and then sometimes, the wedding is the same plus £10,000 but this time it involves emigrating soon after without my nephew.
I know I'm touchy about this and at some point I'll make a thread but I can't get past it. How could any decent father do that?

mugglewump no decent father could do that I'm sorry, it must really hurt to have your brother behave in such an awful way and I don't blame you at all for not going to his wedding.

'It's fine to have secret thoughts you don't share with the other guests.'

oh yes I agree with Edam

at a wedding of some uni mates one time my other uni mate was getting amrried 6 months after
all through the service and reception she kept saying to her fiance ' we won't do such-and-such like this will we' and he'd go 'oh no, it'll be much more relaxed/organised etc'

I thought it was so rude!

I don't undrstand why some MNers are so anti-marriage. At our wedding everyone got dressed up in their best; I wore a big dress and everyone spent the day telling me I was beautiful; all our friends and family were there to wish us well; we had nice food, drink and a knees-up. What's not to like?
Mind you, we got maried a long time ago when weddings weren't so expensive and competitive.

When I go to weddings, I don't indulge in compare-and-conrast. I listen to the vicar going on about the supremacy of love and get all soppy. It's a nice reminder / refresher for your own vows.

I can't bear talking to all those people I'm never going to meet again. When has anyone ever made a new friend or met anyone amazing at a wedding? I know I'm an old curmudgeon , but its exhausting explaning AGAIN how many kids you have, how you know the bride, where you live, how you got up here etc. I live for the disco.

We went far, far away for our's - and it was amazing. None of that boring 'same old' that most people have and lots of inane small talk with people you're not bothered about. And I just couldn't face the organisation. Our's was so special - just the two of us - and so, so memorable - at a fraction of the cost of these glitzy, over-tacky dos that I personally can't stand.

My wedding was the best wedding I've ever been to. But like you, I'd never say that in real life!

I guess most married people had a wonderful time at their own wedding, and think it was the best ever because the music, food, venue etc was all exactly to their taste. It is natural and does not make you a terrible person.

I do find it amazing how many MNers seem so bitter about weddings! They are just celebrations and are all different.

These threads always bring out the horsehair tampon wearers in full force. "Bwaaaaahhh! How could you possibly enjoy yourself when other people are living on 50p a day? How dare you celebrate when other people are getting divorced!" and if it's not that it's competitive pennypinching: "I made my own wedding dress out of used cloth nappies and fed the guests earwax bonbons."

yabu because MY wedding wqas the best wedding ever!!!

seriously-it wa fantastic and we've been married 11 years so it has lasted!