IL message re: new house

[Shamalamadungbeetle]

How would you feel if you’d just bought your first house with your husband and the Congratulations you bought a house card that you received from his parents said on the front “His house, her rules.”

AIBU: No problem with the card
AINBU: Twats

I’d cross out the his and put hers instead so reads: Her house, Her rules. And have it front and center on the mantle piece.

That is true tbh I hadn't quite grasped that it said "his house" in that sense. Yeah that's rude.

I would drop it in a conversation that actually your parents gave half of the deposit. What did they give - oh the rude card.

Hope you have had it stated in documents about your parents gave half, worse case scenario should you divorce and house needs selling then you would be entitled to 3/4ths of the house increase in value- I think.

It’s one of those ‘funny’ cards, that appeal to some, but it’s saying they think you are a bossy boots really, or they would have chosen a nicer card without an ‘amusing’ observation on it. Put it in the recycling bin.

We got the same card but ours said her house , her rules and the funny thing is it is my house that i put the complete deposit down for and the mortgage is mine etc. I just binned it and thought they were being dicks

If you think it was a dig then stuff 'em. If it's out of nowhere and they're nice people then just take it as a lame joke that didn't land move on.

It really depends on the context of the relationship you have with them. If they regularly take digs about you wearing the pants in the house as a criticism, then it's rather awful. If you regularly banter about that sort of thing and it's all in good humour, fine.

I can’t believe anyone would be bothered by this. It’s just nice that someone has taken the trouble to send a ‘new home’ card.

Whatever happened to cards that just say "Congratulations on your new home"?
There is no need for cards that reference who owns what or who supposedly rules the roost, that is just crass and hugely unfunny.

Id' probably do the same, whist fantasising about taking a picture of it in the bin.
With a caption that said
"Damn Straight"

OP do you have a "little" job for pin money as well?

Personally I would feel life is too short to care. I couldnt bring myself to be bothered about a joke card.

They handed it to us so DH opened it, didn’t react and passed it to me. I said “Our house actually” and put it back in the envelope and left it on the side.

Perfect response.

Followed up with you are very welcome when you stay here.

Pay it no mind is my point. It's no one of their theoretical or literal business in terms of your finances etc.

I would shrug, pop the card on the side (as you have already done) and keep hosting as to what it suitable for you.

That would have irritated me and I'd have been tempted to file it carefully in the recycling bin. In front of them.

I'd be beyond furious and I usually comment telling people to chill out on here.

Old people finding humor that was normal in their generation funny...

It isn't exactly shocking or worth anger.

We will all be the same. If you are in your 30s now, by the time you are in your 70s, you'll still find the humor of your 20s/30s funny, even if your children or grandchildren now deem it (correctly) to not be appropriate...

Just roll your eyes and move past it.

I'd take it as a joke.

Are you bossy? Maybe it was more a dig about that, but either way, not really funny.

Ooo that's so hilarious
Bin it.

I’d just shrug it off tbh, but things like that rarely bother me when I know what I put in. I just see it as a bit of a generational thing

Try not to take offense so easily.

Just take on board their sense of humour, OP.

And by that I mean diverge to those kind of brash, horrible cards for their special occasions. You know, the ones with just writing on the front that say things like ‘happy birthday you fat bitch’ and ‘if you looked any older you’d be dead’ and even the more surreal end of crap humour, obviously written by badly paid copywriters on their sixteenth pint. FiL’s bday? ‘your bollocks called, Tutankhamen wants them back’. And so on.

It would annoy me. I had it with my ex IL telling my ex what a great life I had being able to live in his house

I can’t imagine being upset over this it’s such a non issue