Another mum picked up her teen after party and refused others a lift despite agreement to do so.

[Lardybumbum]

The background story is my 16 year old daughter, her 15 yo boyfriend and two of their class mates were invited to a party a few rural towns away. I agreed to give them a lift there if one of their mums agreed to run them back. One mum said she would do that and her kid confirmed again when I dropped them all off.

The town is only 15 mins away but there’s no public transport after 6pm on weekends (and at that no direct public transport between our towns having to go into a city and back out again) and being Halloween there were no taxis /ubers who were all working in the city.

Well the boys mum left my daughter, her boyfriend and one friend and only took her son home. All four were standing outside the house at 11.45pm waiting for her and she literally drove off with just him in the car saying the others couldn’t come. I get a tearful phone call from a very panicked daughter so I get out of bed and go get them. I have to take medication at night that I’m wary of driving on (although it isn’t illegal) but I’m not leaving my kid in the middle of nowhere. The other parents had all been drinking so couldn’t.

Aibu to think that was an arsehole move on behalf of the other mother to allow her kid to accept the ride and agree to the deal she would pick up them to just leave them and take her kid home? Her kid messaged my daughter today there wasn’t any mitigating reason for her leaving them she just didn’t want to.

She lives two streets away and I’m tempted to go and say something. If I’d been drinking there would have been no one to get them and they’d have been stranded (there’s no way to walk between towns either).

I assume something else must have happened because what sort of parent would do this.

get the mothers side of the story, but on the face of it, if be furious.

I’d want to know what happened.

That’s shocking. My DD went to a party and when I went to get her I made sure all the kids hanging about had lifts sorted.

Absolutely!!!

OP - Having picked up my drunken DCs plus friends/random teens on many many occasions.
And more times than I’d like to remember, sitting in the car sending increasingly angry messages to hurry up….. it would be my own DC I’d be questioning before getting mad at the other parent!!!

I would be asking her what happened, to her face.

And she could whistle Dixie for any future favours, they would not be forthcoming.

So do you have a text where this mum agreed to collect all of them? I who’s screenshot and send her that and ask what happened?

I would have called her last night, failing that first thing this morning.

She left them as she couldn't be bothered and as they were 3, she didn't care.

I would have no hesitation telling her exactly what she is - a fucking asshole.

I'd be fuming and would speak to the parent asking why 😔

I read that as the kids were in different states of drunkeness. Not the mum!

I would be sending a very harsh message to her, and then i would be telling all the other parents not to make agreements with her.

I’d be sorely tempted to create a WA group with her and the other parents. Each of you prepare your side of how your children were affected by her actions. Not necessarily for a response, but to ensure you’re able to say your peace without a shouting match affecting the children

This is awful. What an irresponsible woman. I would definitely be saying something.

You need to ask her why she broke the agreement. Start with that and see what she says. If there was no good reason my next message to her would be that I will never give her DC a lift anywhere ever again.

I can't fathom how an adult let alone parent could do that. When I was home from uni I would frequently pick my younger siblings up from places that were an hour+ round trip away. Countless times I would go back and pick up more carfuls if I wasnt happy their friend, or not friends, were getting home safely. I'm would always take my parents people carrier so there were plenty of seats. I was 19 - 23 at that time and most of my friends were the same with their younger siblings. I would find what this parent did unforgivable and wouldnt be shy about making my feelings known.

Also how come the other two didn’t call their parents? Why did you get landed with both lifts?

The answer to that is in the op

At 16 I never got picked up. Always had to sort it out myself

Yeah that's a shit move and only going to hurry their own child as noone will want to include them in lifts now

Amazing well done you!

I would message and ask her why - just say thought the arrangement was for you to bring xyz home. Was the their a reason you didn’t bring them? As others have said they might have been a legit reason or something happened at the party and her child didn’t want them In the car!! I would give her a chance to explain and then if she says she just didn’t want to - I would be telling everyone what a selfish cow she is

This exact situation happened to me at aged 13, except it was a drama class, finishing at 9pm, middle of winter, in a very dodgy part of Paisley. Reciprocal lifts were arranged with a girl who previously hadn't shared lifts with the group my folks were part of. She was given a lift out by my dad, but I left the class to find she'd gone ahead on the way downstairs, and the panic I felt when I walked out on to the street to see them driving off. Luckily another parent - who didn't know me (though I knew her kids) - drove around the corner to see me stranded, no coat, and bundled me into her car lying across the laps of the other children in her back seat (it was the 1990s).

The dad who left me stranded found that his daughter (15) never got in to the lift pool ever again. Shame for her, though I remember she was a bit of an arsehole too.

Yes, but I wouldn't just drive off in a huff leaving teens stranded in the middle of nowhere, I would find out how they intended to get home and if it turns out they really thought it was me taking them (or there was no one else) then of course I would absolutely would, I would also be having words with my son not to make promises on my behalf and in future deal directly with the mother regarding pick up arrangements, but to leave them like that? No I'd get them home safely and deal with things in the morning, I'd never forgive myself if one of them had an accident trying to walk home in the dark on fast country B road.

I'd be furious and would need to know why! Would have to ask her

Not saying that is what should happen. But one poster was representing it as we all got picked up at that age, when that is just not true.