Am I wrong to continue to refuse to socialise with DH’s best man

[Westernweath]

I got married last summer (2025) and took offence to a comment made by DH’s best man. Juvenile humour at my expense. I remained calm at the time but told DH in no uncertain terms I would not socialise with him again.

He has respected that until now. Big row last night that I’ve ‘dragged it out for over a year and need to move on now’. I explained I felt embarrassed in front of family and friends. He says as he has apologised repeatedly I should give him a second chance, and be mindful that a lot of alcohol was consumed by him and he has ‘cut right down as a result’.

Maybe I am stubborn. But I believe that fool me once, you don’t get another chance.

YABU - move on and agree to meet up
YANBU - stick to your position

Yeah you’ve massively over reacted. If it wasn’t true I’m sure people realise; if it was true you’ve no basis for complaint.

You’re giving her way to much grace

Grow a funny bone. Seriously OTT reaction.

I feel bad for laughing

He wasn’t poking fun about a health issue. He was laughing about a normal thing that everyone does.

@Westernweath YANBU to be hurt, but unless there's a massive back story about him always behaving like this, then I do think that YABU not to give him a another (last) chance.

I'm very sensitive to be laughed at, as I was awfully bullied and ridiculed as a child, and I would have been mortified to have people laughing at me supposedly farting.

The fact that it happened on your wedding day, when it's meant to be your special day, would've made it feel even more embarrassing to me, and I'd have been really upset, so I don't think YANBU to be upset by his crude comment, and I understand why you were, as I'd feel the same.

A year has passed now, though, so I think that if this is the 1st time he's behaved so badly, I'd be prepared to give him another chance, especially seeing as he's apologised and, more importantly, changed his behaviour to ensure it doesn't happen again.

I think he did say it in the best man's speech didn't he? If so it's really chavvy and I'd be mortified

So he could have laughed about himself doing it not poking fun at the bride to everyone in the room. If the subject of the ‘joke’ doesn’t find it funny then it isn’t funny

Not read the full thread, but if this is it you are MASSIVELY overreacting and BVU.

I don’t think there is coming back from this because the problem is it’s not about you backing down in socialising with him

To be honest if I was him or his friendship group, I couldn’t be arsed with you to make such a drama over acomment like that and bear a grudge for nearly a year. I just want nothing to do with you.