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AIBU?

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I have a first date in a few hours, now he’s texted me something that’s put me off

601 replies

Jtfrtj · 25/10/2026 15:41

I have a first date tonight with a man I’ve never met, we started talking online. He knows I’m very into cooking/baking, and just now while texting him I told him I made some protein pancakes. He asked if he could have some, I joked back that I would make him some, and because they’re protein pancakes they will make him strong. He replied “Strong so I can lift you in bed yeah 😏?”. I’ve never even met this man before. Now I feel that expectation and pressure for sex is there now and feel less excited about meeting him. It also feels very presumptuous of him, like he thinks because I’ve agreed to a date I’m up for sexual activity. I’ve not texted back yet because I’m not sure I want to go now.

For context; I have never made any sexual remarks towards him before or him to me, we have been talking for almost two weeks. I am conventionally attractive but I am not provocative in how I dress or how I present myself online. Most of my photos online are of my travel pictures, scenery and food etc. I don’t think I do anything to invite these remarks or give off the impression that I’d be into that so prematurely, but for some reason men will always try and initiate a conversation about sex before the first date. I’m getting tired of it. Am I overreacting?

OP posts:
TheThirteenthFairy · Yesterday 18:02

momtoboys · 26/10/2026 13:12

"I could definitely make innuendo out of pancakes and protein.
Pancake - referring to your genitals and eating remarks
Protein- doesn't take a genius to get from there to ejaculate
I'm a 43 year old widow with a child and I'd be laughing away, flirting and loving the joke"

I have been out of the dating game for a long time but I cannot seem to make the connection from pancakes to genitals. 😂It was the "calm down" remark that got me. Good job for making your thoughts crystal clear.

FFS, it's not like she offered him toad in the hole.

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