You're 8 now, old enough to do it yourself

[Angrycatnoises]

Do you agree?

Dd when she finished her bowl of pomegranate seeds on the sofa asked Dh to go and put it in the kitchen please. Each time this happens or she asks for a drink/snack, he says she should take it back herself etc. I tend to do it mostly for her, she's very independent, always has been, sorts her own school bag, homework, showers etc, but she's still only young and it's not too much that a parent brings her food and drinks, is it?!

Dh and I disagree a little on this

How much do you do for your 8 year old (or around that age)?

My 4 year old is expected to clear his plates, just as he does and has done for some time at nursery.

Is your 8 year old the only child in the family.
I can't imagine having to take a few kids plates to the sink.
If she can put her books in her schoolbag, she's able to bring a plate to the sink

YABU for blaming your DH. Your DD is old enough to take her own stuff away.

And YABU for feeding your DD pomegranate seeds. WTAF? 😆

I would tell her to take her dish back to the kitchen herself. You say she's old enough to and easily able to do so, so it seems strange to me for her to request that her parents wait on her. Or at least why not stay out of it when your husband turns down such an unnecessary request. It made me wonder if the child is sub-consciously being used in some kind of power struggle between the adults.

Why?

“Humphrey…dispose of my pomegranate seed bowl”

So she expected her dad to get up, purely for the purpose of putting her bowl in the sink whilst she remained sat there like a little princess. F* no 🤣.

She can definitely manage the mammoth task of taking her bowl back to the kitchen, @Angrycatnoises - neither you nor dh should be waiting on her hand and foot.

You want to raise a person who can clear up after themselves, not one who thinks it is OK to summon the staff to clear her dirty plate.

Making her snacks is different - I’m sure she could sort out some snacks, but others might be beyond her current capabilities, so you aren’t unreasonable to make the snacks for her, if she can’t do it herself.

I really needed all these pomegranate seeds jokes tonight 😂Thank you, everyone 👏 👏 OP, if you don't expect her to do it now at 8, when do you??

But every single time?

Lol, what's wrong with eating on the sofa? What a weird rule.

Anyone else amazed that an 8yo cares about putting away a bowl straight after finishing?

You're going to regret this when she is a teenager and helping herself to snacks/home alone but hasn't developed the habit of tidying up after herself. You really need to start young with those habits.

Yes every single time. Why wouldn't she?

Of course she can do it herself! That doesn't mean you can't offer to take it if you're going anyway (or even if you're not) but you definitely need to get her out of thinking that her parents are a pair of unpaid footmen!

Wow my youngest dgs who isn't 2 yet takes his plate out and puts rubbish in the bin.

Copied from his 8 year old brother who has been doing it for years

Not jump up no, but sometimes do it and sometimes get her a drink etc, not always say to get her own

Now is the time to get her used doing these things herself, she isn’t a toddler anymore.

Does anyone else get the feeling that perhaps OP is joking around here?

YABU, I agree with your Dh. You and your dh are not her servants. She should also be able to get her own snacks and drinks at this age and should be helping out with age suitable chores around the house. Saying she's only young and doing everything for her whenever she asks is not helping her in the long run. If you baby her like this she could end up spoiled and disrespectful.

She's very able to, but sometimes I let her relax a little and do it, I don't find it that weird

I wouldn’t be fetching and carrying snacks for an 8 year old to be honest. If I was going to the kitchen anyway then fine, but otherwise then I think they should be able to manage it themselves!

Thought the same!
Was it a pan oh chocolaaaaaaaa little Hugo wanted? 😂

Why not?! 😂
She asked for them as her friend had them for her snack today, so she wanted the same

I ask my 3 and 5 year olds to take their plates out to the kitchen themselves and they sometimes do it without prompting. No way in hell would I be doing that for a healthy, able-bodied 8 year old. Different if I was heading to the kitchen myself but otherwise nope, 8 years old is at least 4 years past old enough to do it themself.