Is DH being unfair after I put DD back in nappies due to stomach bug?

[OneLilacReader]

DD is 3 years 7 months and potty trained a few weeks ago (a bit late I know but she was just a bit slow to get it!). Today she’s been ill with a stomach bug that I think she’s picked up from nursery. She still wears nappies at night, and after an accident in her night nappy this morning before we got ready for the day I decided it would be best if we put her back in them just to cover any accidents.

Fast forward to this evening and I’m glad we did because she didn’t make it to the toilet at all today. DH has just had a go at me saying that that was my fault and I’m undoing all our hard work training her. AIBU to to think he’s being completely unnecessary, and a couple of days aren’t going to set her back at all?

No but then I also don’t wear them at night and have had years of learning to listen to my body’s signals…

I put my ds back in nappies when he was really poorly. He was sleeping a lot and still needed a nappy overnight. I didn't want to have to wake him if he had an accident. I explained it was only while poorly. It was fine - he went back to using the toilet as normal once he was better.

It just helped with the cleanup and also stopped her clothes and our furniture/carpet getting messy if she had an accident

He was out this morning when she got up

You sound really lazy. Left potty training until 3 and a half and then straight back in them when she's got the squits. Jeez

I always changed her as soon as she needed it, and surely it’s not different than her going in her pants (apart from less washing and less of a chance of any leaks)

Some people are very judgemental and unnecessarily harsh op. Putting her back in nappies in normal times would be confusing, being unwell and having diarrhoea multiple times a day isn’t normal though. So sometimes we adapt to adverse situations with things that make life easier. All routines go out of the window when kids are unwell and hopefully she will pick it back up again once she’s better. Still try to encourage her to get to the loo if she can but and explain to her that once she’s well again it’s time to go back in pants. It isn’t going to mess her up to the point that she’s still in nappies at 15 so don’t worry about it. Do what’s best for you and if your dh feels so strongly about it then put him on washing and clean up duties.

Sorry OP but yes yabu. Once a child is potty trained you need to keep going. You've done them a disservice putting them back in nappies

I changed her every time she pooed pretty much as soon as she’s done it. She must have wee’d in between then I think

What's done is done.

She's late enough assuming NT girl. Tomorrow the pants go back on.

Exactly my point

I’m with you there. Nothing like trying to keep up with the cleaning whilst the patient is having accidents from both ends all over the place.
My husband gave in and wore adult nappies when he was suffering from uncontrollable explosive bowel effects post prostate cancer treatment. The cleaner (me!) was most grateful for that.

Could you not have called him?

Maybe she didn’t make it to the toilet because she didn’t have to, she had a nappy on. I’m team DH here.

I suppose so but I didn’t think it was that big of a deal to warrant calling him. We both parent this child and so I think we’re capable of making decisions on our own sometimes

It's a big deal to go back to nappies, especially when training so late.

Yes it might mean that she regressed a bit with toilet training.

But I'd rather take another week or two of toilet training again, than a day or two of cleaning up toxic diarrhea and increasing my chances of catching the bug

I agree although I’m worried I may have caught it anyway from changing her and being near her. Oh well, it’s part of being a parent isn’t it x

But thats what nappies are for, regardless of whether the child is potty trained already so I don't understand your post.

If its diarrhea, she likely wouldnt understand her body's urgency to get to a toilet.

Team DH. It will encourage regression and confusion so accidents or not should have stuck to nappy free imho. 3.5 too old for nappies.

I'm surprised how many people think YABU seems like a completely sensible decision your end. Reduces cross contamination and the poor little thing wouldn't make it to the toilet anyway? Over reaction from DH. Simply explain to your LO that she was in a nappy as had a poorly tummy and now she's better she must use the toilet. No big issue, and also important to keep her hydrated if she's ill. I'd think toileting pressure could make things much worse in the future if they're ill.

Thank you! This is exactly what I was thinking

That’s just lazy on your part.

I love mumsnet for these comments. Yes very lazy of you OP. You should've spent the whole day wiping poo off your cream carpets and be grateful for the opportunity to do so. Soooooo lazy! 😂