AIBU for refusing primary school homework apart from reading?

[AntiPrimaryHomework]

My dc are 7,9 and 13. We’ve never done any homework at primary school. I strongly disagree with it all except reading.

The school aren’t happy but my dc all have ASD and ADHD diagnosed and they are too exhausted every weekday and at weekends we let them play and relax and take them out.

At secondary school we believe homework is necessary and ds1 happily does his but for primary we just don’t agree at all.

Does anyone else feel the same ?

Wtf? Thats really weird. Our school sets homework but its basically because Ofsted make them. They don't mind if you do it or not. Just in year 6 they try to get the kids to do it to prepare for secondary school.

Is this a state or independent school?

I'm surprised they're so set on homework since all the research points to there being no benefit to homework in primary. None of mine have SEND but I was very anti homework when they were that age. Activities, family conversation over dinner and reading were much more important. Fortunately the schools they were at (mostly) agreed. All three have gone on to have very successful educational outcomes and adjusted just fine to homework in secondary.

I'd stick to your guns, OP.

I had no3 after a long gap. I refused to do "project work" with my 5 year old. I was working full time and she was in breakfast and afterschool club. The value of me spending half a term making a model of Dover Castle was lost on me.
They decided that she could join the homework club and do it there.

How much and what homework do they get aside from reading?
have the children attempted the homework and found it too much or have you just decided its a no?
What have the school said when you voiced your concerns?
Presumably the 13 yr old is at secondary school how are they coping with homework?

My children didn’t do much beyond reading. I didn’t enforce it, I don’t think it’s necessary. In fact I thought back in the day there were studies confirming beyond reading, homework wasn’t really necessary?

25 years ago l stopped doing any homework with my DD apart from reading, honestly the tears and tantrums were not worth it.
By the time she went to secondary she was happy to do homework and went on the get a good degree. Honestly l dont believe small children need math worksheets or stupid building a castle projects.

Id do reading, spellings and timetables.

The rest is unnecessary

They need to agree it is a reasonable adjustment within ordinarily available provision. I hope the thing you signed said that, rather than that it is a choice of yours.
Look to the future evidence you might need to get them provision before 2030, should they need it especially the youngest. the worst case scenario for SEND may well be in place then.

If only!
DS and his friend get exactly the same homework. One of them finds it easy and takes less than 5 minutes, the other doesn't and it is a battle. It's not benefitting either of them.

Our primary (I'm a parent governor) does not give homework as a school policy other than spellings and reading. Once a term there is a project time home activity which is done for a "showcase" on the last day of term, which parents are invited to go to. No children are made to do it and there are many options given so that no one should feel overwhelmed by it. That said any child with sen would be allowed to opt out if they wanted.

Never had a problem with schools giving homework, I think it sets children up for success. Son did homework from primary up, stood him in very good stead throughout school then uni now at work where he has exams to do. He still had time for sports and playing, we were just organised and got it done.

I think this is one of those stances that really varies.

if your child is super intelligent and you never do homework with them but they are British chess champion for their age and speak three languages and play two instruments it’s a bit different from if they are falling behind in class and with a bit of extra support and work at home could be doing much better.

sure, some kids are fine without doing times tables practice and homework and reading and so on. Most kids do benefit from doing daily practice at things though.

I feel the same and haven’t forced it until now, but DD now in Y5 and I’m starting to push it harder as she needs to adjust before secondary tbh. She is ND and it’s often a nightmare. I hate that it’s expected.

I would not be at all happy with the school claiming “educational neglect” when the evidence is that homework other than reading at primary is of no real educational benefit.

We didn’t do homework because it was set via a stupid app and involved making the small child write with their finger on a phone or tablet - in no way beneficial for writing and we were trying to reduce device dependency at home. DD1 has adjusted perfectly fine to doing it at secondary.

I would make an exception for SEND kids OP to be clear and maybe this is a reasonable adjustment but as a general rule I think the current taboo about homework at primary school is a bit ridiculous.

Loads of my daughter’s peers at primary went in to complain to the head about their kids being asked to do a sheet of spellings and a bit of basic maths twice a week in year five. It was such an overreaction to argue that 10 year olds are too tired to do half an hour’s homework when they are capable of hanging out after school and playing video games etc. But its become a weird shibboleth that homework in primary school is a gross intrusion and damaging to mental health. Mainly the MC families who had a problem with it and I kept my mouth shut but I thought it was pathetic.

SEND is a different matter but outside of that I can’t see why doing 30 minutes of very basic homework twice a week is such a hardship and kids who arrive at secondary without any experience of homework are going to be at a disadvantage.

Its really just about the habit and discipline of it, not the academics.

When mine were at primary I remember the head saying homework was only given as parents requested it.
No real need at primary

How is it educational neglect? You are the parents. You parent and the school teach.

Yanbu. Primary children don't need shit loads of homework. Mine used to get more than their sibling in yr 7! We never used to do it either our entire Sundays would be taken over with meltdowns over it (asd) so nope.

My dd is suspected ASD and ADHD (on the waiting list for assessment), and I don’t refuse homework but I don’t force her to do it so sometimes it won’t get done. I worked hard to find and try out different types of resources to find what suits her, so sometimes homework will be in a different form to what was sent home, but if she wants to do for example flash cards or short activity worksheets instead of the set work then that’s what we do.

Other than reading and the usual parenting instructional activities we never did any homework at primary school.

Homework in primary isn’t compulsory.

it’s a nightmare to get my SEN child to do it. He won’t be going to a mainstream high school and the SEN schools I’ve viewed don’t give it to them.

its alright saying if you choose that school then you abide by the rules, I actually don’t want my child in a. Mainstream primary school, he’s forced there as the LA won’t let me choose an SEN school even though my child has an EHCP.

i pick and choose what rules are appropriate for my SEN child, if the school don’t like it then they’re free to tell the LA that they cannot meet need. At least that way I’ll have a much better chance of him going to an SEN school.

My primary teacher friends are all anti homework.

I dont mind maths and spelling (I actually pay for a tutor for an hour a week!) But my elder child has about 30 mins of topic work a week which is painful for us both. He's never had any feedback on it so I assume it's just getting them into the habit. ds' teachers said they didnt care as long as he does the maths

I'm a former primary school teacher and I can honestly say most homework given out in primary is a box ticking exercise which will achieve nothing.

Reading (material that they enjoy) is important and I think find ways of practicing things like times tables (eg the apps which are little games).

In y6 I think there should be a gradual intro to homework in preparation for secondary.

I think a lot of primary school teachers would agree with you that it's completely unnecessary.
I don't do it with my youngest who's autistic, I follow his lead and do activities that interest him and work towards his targets which school are fine with. They send home the whole class homework which is way beyond his abilities sometimes.
My older one didn't have any additional needs but was very advanced. He didn't do homework either or read the school books. They were sending him home with Biff and Chip when he was reading Harry Potter at home. I wasn't going to waste our time or take his love for reading away by forcing him to read boring books. He went to a different school than my youngest and his school were fine with it too.

I refused it all except reading to. It has no proven link with success. My kids do it no problem now they are in secondary but when they were in primary I didn’t see the point in putting us all through it. Eldest got excellent GCSEs recently which she worked very hard for.