AIBU to worry CMS deductions could push my son into crisis?

[Wokeuptired]

My son split from his ex almost 2 years ago, they have 2 children together and 1 child that my son brought up as his own, their was lots of drama in the relationship and his ex was very demanding, my son paid her maintenence every month and paid for other things for her like the sky bill and some h/p goods, at the end of last year my son took a very serious attempt at taking his own life and he got sectioned, he obviously couldn't work but his ex was still demanding money from him, In March he got his old job back but he had to save for a deposit and furniture as well as pay for prescriptions food fuel to get to work, he was around £200 short each month and we helped him out with that, during this time his ex refused to let him see the children and he has not seen them since January, he had an upcoming court case to get to see them, as the eldest isn't his biologically he had to get a lawyer to help him as he wants her included.
Now the CMS are involved and they have taken £1700 out of his wages this is £700 for the month and £1000 in back pay as they calculated this from December last year, this leaves my son with around £500 after tax, he can't live on £500 as he can't even cover his rent with that, he has just got himself sorted financially but still owes money.
He doesn't know what he can do as he has phoned CMS and they said it has to be that amount and he explained the situation.
He has been to his boss to see what can be done and if he leaves this job he will break his contract with them and they won't employ him again, he can't go part time and then do work on the side to make the money up.
He just can't afford to work, it's ridiculous as he doesn't want to go on benefits as he also pointed out that it won't help his mental health.
What can he do?
I'm just so worried that he is going to try and end his life again as this seems like a no win situation.

How much can you give him?
Or extended family?

Anyone to cover the backlog and then he can pay whomever back over a longer period

I am sorry he is struggling. However, he has children. He has a duty to support them financially. I doubt his ex went to CMS for the entertainment value. She was probably desperate herself. If his mental health is that poor, he needs to see his GP.

So CMS are deducting £700 a month leaving your ds with £500 a month? So he's earning £1200 a month? Are you sure thats right?

He is under his G.P and the crisis team at the hospital, he is not wanting to pay for the children but while he only has £500 to live on a month his ex is bringing in over 3k a month, how is that fair?
If he loses his home he won't be able to have his children overnight. It's all so messy and their is only so much we can do that's why I have put it on here as I'm desperate to help him.

It says they also took £1000 back pay, so £2200

Surely that’s just a big payment due to him missing previous payments. He’s not going to be expected to pay that every month unless he earns a hell of a lot of money which clearly he doesn’t.

Help him out with the back log and then he can get back on track paying the normal payment.

You say he treats her eldest as his own, I hope to God he hasn’t been silly enough to pay CMS for him too?

That was a one off though, the £1000

£700 a month for the child maintenance plus another £1000 for back payments and my son is left with £500 a month as his wages are around £2500-£2800 before tax etc.
Obviously the £1000 back payments would be paid off in 9 months but he can't pay next month's rent. He asked CMS if they could just take an extra £300 a month but they said no.

I thought a backlog was cleared at a reasonable rate, although of course there should never have been a backlog. When and why did he stop paying? If when he was sick and not earning surely his contribution was supposed to be 0 at that point?

The backlog is the issue, how big and how long til it's cleared.

Note - what mum earns is irrelevant.

He didn't pay when he should have, accumulated arrears and now CMS have taken it back as he has a job. It won't be every month.

Saying that I do feel for him. It can be really hard as a single male to survive and if court and solicitors fees are going to have a big impact.

He dors need to pay for his kids though. Any chance that you can help him, this month, and then with legal fees?

Who do you expect to pay for his children? Who does he expect to pay fir his children?

I didn’t think CMS deducted straight from wages, I thought it was up to the dad to pay/transfer the money?

if your son has a court mandated deduction from salary then things must have been going on a long time to get to that point.

We have credit cards and we are helping with some of his bills already just to take a bit of stress off him.

Does his CMS payment cover the older child . I know you said he wants to include her still.
But that child has a father somewhere .

His ex should not be refusing him access to his DC, often trotted out on MN but children are not "Pay Per View"

However much his x is bringing in each month is not relevant and none of your business.

What is relevant is he has CMS to pay, thus he has to pay it.

CMS deducted back pay - was he not paying the correct amount since Christmas, despite working properly since March ?

Is it only this month that back dated money will be taken, or does he still owe money ?

Is it always £700 a month when he earns £2,300 a month - that's more than 25% ?
How many children is he paying CMS for 2 or 3 ?

If you're worried your son is going to kill himself, I'd suggest persuading him to move back home with you.

To be honest I'm not sure if he is paying for the older child, i know he was last year when he paid her directly.
But he really doesn't want to give up working as he wants to be able to support his children but he can't live on £500 a month for the next 9 months. And we can't afford to give him £9000.

Well no one if he's brown bread?

People focus so much on a mum needing the money, they don't consider what she'd do if she didn't have means of getting it. Thick as two short planks is an understatement.

OP - I would say he needs a year for him to get back on his feet to then re - start the CMS.

I really think that's the best case for the children in this circumstance. I've seen how this pans out

Are you sure he’s telling truth as those numbers don’t seem to stack up. You said 9 months at 1000 per month which is about a year of his missing the normal £700 monthly payment. If they’ve only been split 2 years and he hasn’t worked some of that time how has he built such a big backlog. And £700 seems a lot for his current salary anyway.

Wow thats a lot of money! He needs to
make sure the older one is not involved in the calculation. He needs to survive.
We hear on here all the time how little mums are paid from
CMS. How can they think &500 is enough to live on?

He can't move in with us as we are not local to him. I don't want to be too outing .

For the time he was unemployed, his CMS payments would be zero (or £7 a week if on benefits). So, where have the arrears come from? To have £9000 in arrears, he must have missed years of payments.

Also, his standard payment without arrears is £700. He had to be a high earner for that. He is taking home plenty each month of his calculation is £700 a month. You say he is earning £2200 a month? Then his payment would be 16% of that. About £350. Not £700.

Your figures are simply not correct. You aren’t getting the full story here.

*If the third child is on the claim (shouldn’t be) then it is 19%. Still no where near £700 a month.

You need to get the facts, because what you’ve posted simply isn’t true.

@Merrybandofpirates I agree.

Her income has no bearing on his responsibility. CMS is based on his income not hers.

There is something off about all the numbers you are giving so I suspect he is being economical with the truth.

I have seen all the paperwork, we can't see how it's right either as it doesn't add up, but cms says it's correct, should he call then again? And what should he say?