AIBU to feel fed up with my husband on holiday?

[Itsa10fromLen]

My god I need to vent! On holiday, OH just cannot come around in the mornings. I know it’s supposed to be a holiday for everyone but how much sleep does one person need? Technically the kids aren’t up so he doesn’t need to be but it’s hard to find a man attractive that needs 10 hours sleep every night and that sets an alarm to sleep through! He also would be upset to miss breakfast (I wouldn’t) so I’m making sure he’s up (I know I should leave him but I can’t stand the grumbling if I didn’t)

And if he tells me he’s sweating and red hot one more time so help me god! Constantly telling us what food he’s had like we can’t see.

I don’t like him, being this close has made that more obvious 😭

If he asks me if I’m having a nice time is it cruel to say no?

Hahahaha stalker… I’m far too interesting obviously. Who could be arsed to look into a stranger on the internet?! Loser.

‘I’m very popular’.

Hmm.

I am currently on holiday having the opposite problem. Husband is ready for bed at 9pm because he’s up at 5am and waking me up every morning too early. I’m lucky to be achieving 5 hours sleep a night. I can’t wait to go home. I feel like he gets a kick out of it.
being woke up is not on. I just want to sleep

Holiday is the time to sleep in, if you’re inclined that way. If you’ve not set up something that you must be on time for, what difference does it make when you show up at the pool? He absolutely should do his part of looking after DC. He can set an alarm to get up in time for breakfast. It’s your holiday too. You are free to announce, “I’m going to be leaving the hotel at something o’clock to see/do the things. The children have fresh clothes in the drawer, they’ll need a snack around 3:00. Be sure you put sun cream on them. I’ll see you all at dinner.” Luckily, DH and I both love to sleep late on vacation, love to take naps. It’s a delicious rare treat.

You had to wakened up by an alarm at 8am???!!! On holiday?? However late were you wanting to sleep?

Unless you have planned to go out for the day and need to be somewhere at a set time, why are you worrying about who gets up when? You are not joined at the hip. Go and do your own thing and get together later when he has surfaced. It's a non issue.

Interesting people don't go on holiday and sit on mumsnet to bitch about their DH so nastily.

Popular people dont tend to recieve so much loathing.

Are you quite certain you're as interesting and popular as you so claim to be OP?

If this is real, WOW. What a bit*h you are. You clearly cannot stand the man but you went on holiday with the poor bloke? I hope he divorces you asap

Hahahaha this whole post has to be a wind up. He’s fat and lazy and you are ‘actually very popular’. Hahaha. Straight out of Mean Girls

We deffo would not be friends and I think you will find that the majority of women have never felt murderous towards their partners, nor called them fat and lazy, nor wished them to fall off a cliff, nor wished that they had an underlying health condition that would kill them. You sound like a psychopath.
I hope he kicks you out and gets custody of the kids as you sound unhinged

I’m up and at em on a holiday but I get that other folk prefer a lazy pace. I wouldn’t go on holiday with those people though! Can you say to him that the choice is you wake him up at 9, say, and he doesn’t get to moan about getting up, or you leave him to sleep regardless of breakfast and he doesn’t get to moan about missing the breakfast - his choice?

Unless you want to ruin the kids holiday with the big talk, I'd suggest if he asks if you're having a nice time you just say yes. Keep the peace and keep your thoughts to yourself.
Then when you get home tell him that you want a divorce.
Living with a man you dislike and despise to this extent is very bad for all of you, him and your children included so you need to do the decent thing.

You said he’s fat and sleeping 10+ hours, does he snore as well? Maybe he’s got sleep apnea? It would explain needing all that sleep and sleeping through an alarm all the time.

You should leave him. Sounds like he'd be better off without you

What’s he doing now?

That’s a judgement. And not yours to make.

My mum was one of those “up and at ‘em” people. It was a nightmare on holiday, and in daily life as a kid. It seeped into my adulthood and I find it impossible to relax, because in my head I have her voice telling me how lazy I am and it’s such a waste. There is no rule that says an adult can’t sleep as much as they want on holiday, absent any other responsibilities. It doesn’t make a person lazy, just as someone who always has to keep themselves busy isn’t necessarily restless and incapable of letting themselves be in their own mind.

I can understand how the moaning and other stuff is annoying, especially as you said you don’t like him so it’s obvious you will latch on to his annoying habits, but it is clear you are two very different types of people and you feel your ways are superior. Just leave him and be done with it.

Do you work?
Does he work?

I find when I’m on holiday my body relaxes and I need my sleep. I seem to make up for all the days when I’m up at 0330 to go to work.
Cut him some slack and let him
sleep .
Jeaus - I’d stay in bed to just avoid you too!

It's not Disney fairytale to not be a nasty bitch to the person you're supposed to live. .

I share dark humour with my partner, I don't use it against him. Just admit that you can't stand the poor bastard and end it.

You're just being a martyr now. Leave him to it. If his alarm is waking you up, hide his phone or somehow silence it. I wouldn't hepp him with anything.

And after you come home, make sure you never go on holiday with him again.

You don’t like him.

Why are you with him?

He deserves better.

No that i believe this for a second but ti hope that everyone who mindlessly defended the o.p at first is suitably embarrassed

They definitely come across as insecure deep down. The fact they don’t have any friends to vent to as well is quite sad.. but, I can sort of see why after a few replies. Meh starting to change my opinion on the topic.

It’s warmed my heart to know that if I finally get rid of this man that so many of you wonderful women would be more than happy with an obese, moaning man that needs 10+ hours of sleep (that’s what holidays are for after all) it’s great to know that my children will have a lovely, understanding step Mum that never gets mad at him and tells him he’s not fat at all, the sweat pouring from his head at all times isn’t one bit embarrassing or his own fault for wanting to book an all inclusive holiday to Morocco in August knowing the average temperatures and doing zero exercise despite being considerably younger than me. You’re all so much better than me. You’ll have to excuse me while I go and mutter expletives in the shower, don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings after all.

I’m not insecure at all. I also ‘don’t tell it how it is.’ As someone accused me of earlier. I actually bottle everything up. I have many flaws but insecurity and brutal honestly aren’t part of those. I am
popular, I don’t want to be around anyone except my young children, yet people want to be around me because I’m a people pleaser, I slap on a smile, I facilitate other people’s comfort. I actually hate it about myself, I want to tell people to leave me alone but I don’t. But I won’t lie about it, it isn’t arrogance, it’s the truth. I am popular because I put my own happiness second. I’m not proud of that, it’s a major flaw but it is true.