Baby's first birthday to ask for no boxed gifts?

[sarak20]

Is this reasonable or no. For some context: I have bought all the toys I would like my baby to play with and don't want others gifting toys that I have no space to store. Is it appropriate to ask for no boxed gifts? Thanks

Ask? What the fuck is wrong with people. Ask, my arse. You don't ask - if people feel like gifting things, they will. Be happy they want to celebrate with you, gift or no gift. This acquisitiveness will bring us down eventually, as a society. This and 'wedding lists' - vulgar AF.

Went to see a friends baby on their first birthday . All he wanted was the boxes. 🤣

When my babies were that age all they seemed to want to play with was an old saucepan and some clothes pegs……..oh and the washing basket, empty of course.
However, me reminiscing doesn’t help I know so I would suggest telling people to buy gift vouchers…….then you can choose clothes, books, toys etc as and when purchases become necessary.

If you try to micromanage what your child gets for gifts there’s a chance you’ll miss out on something you never knew they’d love- I know it’s not so much a problem now, but I feel sad when I hear parents saying their children will be happy with x or y, or they’d prefer a donation or a voucher/ money the like- most of my kids’ favourite presents were unexpected!!!

I’ve done this with aunties and uncles and grandparents, we’ve asked for games instead of large plastics.

We’ve even told them we would be happy to accept hand me down toys from family rather then buying toys.

We don’t want to be another landfill family.

I would have interpreted this as wanting charity shop or secondhand gifts only, that would obviously go down very well with the kind of person to specify this!

@KarcherK5

' I think a lot of people don’t know the phrase “no boxed gifts” - when I first saw it on a wedding invitation I was baffled and thought they had some kind of issue with recycling cardboard '

I am only on page one of the thread but yes I am thinking of the recycling aspect. I guess I will be enlightened by the end of the thread.
I am old :) so have not seen this request ( expectation ) on any invites yet...

What did he actually say if he "indirectly" said they expect people to give more than 50 quid?
It's a ridculous amount of money. I'd buy them a book and ignore the "no boxed gifts" and the alleged "more than 50 quid cash" requests.

@sarak20

'sarak20 · Today 09:35
**quite right...yes they spend £20 on each child at most. I think I'm just going to gift a voucher'

based on this reply from you, and your previous ones

I would buy a £20 gift voucher for the nearest ( to your sil ) soft play.

That way you are spending the same as she spends, and you know your gift is going directly to/for the child and not into Mum's purse.

Tho of course she could regift it to a friend...

What an obnoxious pair they are. Buy the child a book and write something meaningful in the front of it and have done. All my kids I have a book for their first birthday and put a photo in the front of them on their birthday with a handwritten note. The kid is one. The parents just want the cash and that is crass and rude.

Love this so much.

Whats a boxed gift? I’d say it’s better to suggest what you would prefer rather than being negative. For example ask for books or bigger size clothes, or get family to chip in for something bigger? We got family to chip in to get my 1 year old a floor bed and mattress. Or ask for an annual pass to local soft play/farm?

So why is he going along with it when he clearly doesn't agree?

I think it's incredibly rude to state a large minimum amount of money that they are expecting from each family member.

I would be replying to your brother that SiL can expect as long as she likes, but that is not how things work in your family. And that you will be gifting a thoughtful, appropriate gift, as you always do.

Hell would freeze over before I would gift a voucher or actual money on this occasion.

I would buy a lovely hardback book as a keepsake, with an inscription from you and your family.

I would have no idea what "boxed gift" means

Can't you just give £20? If you can't afford that then give what you can?
Why would a one year old baby need £50 plus cash per person for a 'gift'?!

She sounds quite money grabbing and odd as a one year old has no concept of age or birthdays and won't remember a single second of it.

If they ask you can make suggestions but otherwise you suck it up.

Not personalised things. Books are the best thing.

Agree, my eldest received a brilliant toy for her first birthday from a friend of mine that was probably only about £10 but it became an absolute favourite.
We loved it too as it was easy to take places with us for hours of entertainment and could be used in a multitude of different ways. Subsequent children loved it too.

£15 mothercare voucher in an envelope it is.

I mean it’s utterly joyless for all involved. You, the parents and the baby.

But that’s what the silly sods asked for so 🤷‍♀️

“What’s a boxed gift?”

It’s a euphemism for we don’t want physical presents, please give us cash!

Fifty quid for a baby’s first birthday? Hahahaa .. nope.