AIBU to expect my parents to manage one vegan barbecue meal?

[veganbbqdrama]

Surely most people can survive if they have just one vegan meal ???!!!

My parents have decided they don’t think they can attend a bbq at my house due to the fact we are a vegan family and they are worried about ‘nutrition gaps’ !!!

Neither have any health conditions.

It’s one meal and we are offering a wide variety of things plus desserts. I said to then if they don’t fancy it that’s fine but they said it’s because they are worried about the food, and asked could they bring their own (no! ) or would I get them a few bits they can eat (non vegan) to which I said I can’t have it in the house.

Surely they could just come for a drink and eat later at home ? They are making such a fuss ?? It’s not like we are pushing veganism or the ethics behind our choice we weren’t planning on talking about it just having a nice family get together !

People are ridiculous, would they complain if you didn't mention veganism but offered them beans on toast? Or a jacket potato? Chips, salad, etc?

We're vegan and had friends refuse to come to my 3 year olds birthday bbq unless they could 'at least bring some halloumi'. I said don't come then 😂

So all the vegetables, fruits, breads, pastas, nuts, herbs, spices in the world are ‘mostly rank’?

You do realise that "gotten" is a real word, dating back many centuries and it features in 3 of Shakespeare's works?

Pesticides have been studied and found to be largely useless as they destroy the insects that eat the pests.
Most crops farmed are to feed the animals meat eaters eat, not to feed the vegans who don't.
And pesticides are used in abundance.

As for your last sentence, almost 26 years, yearly private full health screenings and absolutely nothing wrong with me at almost 45. I must be a miracle.

I love meat but they are being daft its one meal
I would just eat what i was offered .

Get them some of those Richmond vegan sausages. I think they’d be unlikely to tell there was no meat in them. I make peanut burgers for vegan friends and we have to fight off the carnivores who always want to try them.

What a rotten thing to say to @Hoardasurass who is far more knowledgeable on the topic than you are. It’s no wonder you don’t know much if a bit of lazy grammar or spelling distracts you from the content.

This approach to food could kill someone with allergies. Especially if the allergy isn’t to a major allergen so you as the host presume the switch must be safe.

Sounds lovely, sod the parents, can I come ❤️

Your menu sounds delicious. Your parents are being ridiculous and close minded

It doesn't matter how 'nice' anyone thinks vegan food is, or how many vegan things other people (or even OP’s parents) eat. OP's parents have the right to (politely) decline any invitation they like, and the right to choose what they do or don't want to eat.

They don't wan't to come to this event and eat the food on offer. That is entirely up to them, and no-one has the right to try to force them to change their minds.

The invitation has been declined (for whatever reason). That is the end of the matter.

I find it so interesting. I've come across far more meat eaters who are absolute twats about veganism than preachy, selfrighteous vegans. Personally, I think people who go to the hassle of completely avoiding anything that causes suffering to animal are better than the rest of us 😆

I happily eat veggie food but I melt butter into my jacket potatoes, spread it on my toast before the beans.

Extreme views and a lack of flexibility are always unreasonable.

OP's parents aren't asking her to buy or cook meat, fish or dairy, she won't even allow them to bring their own sandwiches.
It seems the best solution for all is for the dps not to attend. OP puts her beliefs before seeing her parents and they put their dietary requirements before seeing their dd and dgc.

It seems they all have the family they deserve !!

We’re a fully vegan household and nothing that’s not vegan comes into our house, whether someone else is bringing it cooked or not. But I’d equally never force anyone - if they wanted to decline the invite that would be absolutely ok with me 🤷🏻‍♀️

Where do you stand on honey?

Oggs vegan victoria sponges contain palm oil.

OP, do you expect vegan food when you go there?

That’s vegan, isn’t it?

I don’t - it makes my feet too sticky.

Sorry, @Supersleepysheepy - couldn’t resist.

This.

tofu is soy based isn’t it?

Not sure which side of the argument you’re on?

Which side has perhaps spent decades pandering to the illogical restrictive eating requirements of the other at every social occasion I wonder?

I’d agree that vegan food can be delicious, though it’s a slightly out of the ordinary thing for a BBQ I’d happily eat it all and so should OPs parents. Maybe a tempeh burger? Some kind of potatoes should be a people pleaser. I’d only wince at fake mayonaise.

To the OP’s idea of an afternoon tea style meal, but vegan… I’d be much more iffy about that than a BBQ tbh, every single component needs or contains butter/dairy or it’s nasty, even a cucumber sandwich is very reliant on decent butter.

Palm oil has massive environmental impact, doesn’t it, @blossomtoes?

That’s so unwelcoming. You either cater or you don’t. OP, you know they’re making excuses but the crux of it is that they don’t want to eat your food. It’s not appetising to them and it’s not something they want to eat.

I would like to come if your parents aren’t interested 😋

Exactly this.