I'm refusing to help my sister pay for her children's school uniform

[mumlifeischaos1990]

My sister has 3 children and this year all of her kids are going to school, her youngest is starting nursery because my sister needs to go back to work. My sister and her husband struggle a little bit financially, hence why my sister needs to go back to work. Obviously it's that time of year where everybody is buying school uniform. Which can be extremely expensive. So my sister asked me if I could help her with the cost of the uniform.

Now her reason for asking me was that me and my DH can afford to send our children to private school. So my financial situation is different than my sisters financial situation. And of course I would love to help my sister...however I just spent almost £2,000 on my kids school uniform this year, which was more than I was expecting however they've both recently gone through a growth spurt and their school is very strict about uniform. And I can't really justify spending more money on school uniforms this month, cause I do still have a budget each month. So I politely told my sister that sorry I won't be able to help her, however I could help her look for shops that have shirts, skirts, tight, etc for a much cheaper price.

Of course my sister didn't overreact when I told her, but she definitely seems a bit annoyed at me.

If you can afford £2000(!!) on school uniform then I'm sure an extra £50 or so won't hurt on budget uniform for your sister's kids. She can pay you back next month

If you can afford it, yes
If you cannot afford it, no
What the hell costs 2k for a kids uniform? Is it designer gear only? 😂

Imagine how much it took you sister to ask you for help..if you CAN afford it wouldn't it feel good to treat your nieces and nephews to uniform?
I would love to be in a position where I could do that for mine.

Was she asking to borrow money to pay you back or did she just want you to sort the uniform?

She should use vinted and ask the school if she needs additional help.

If you can afford to send your kids to a private school that costs £2k just for uniform, you can afford to give your sister some money to help her out.

My kids school is very strict about uniform. Everything has to be bought from the specifc uniform website 😭. Both my kids needed uniforms, multiple shirts, my daughter needed a few skirts and some dresses, my son needed multiple pairs of school trousers, they both needed new shoes (PE shoes and school shoes), they both needed new school bags cause their old bags are broken, they needed PE kits, a tie, jumpers/cardigans, a hat each, jackets, water bottles. And they both needed specific uniforms for their extracurricular activities at school. Then again, there was a lot to buy

She had no plan of paying me back

Just buy the uniform already fgs

You’re not obliged to help your sister but it would be the kind thing to do. I imagine she is very stressed and worried if she’s felt she has to come to you and ask this

We aren't that close but yes she has asked for financial help in the past

If the children are entitled to the pupil premium, it is worth reaching out to the school to see if they can support with uniform.

This. You can get large bundles of all the unbranded items on Vinted for a few pounds. The school will probably have a supply of branded uniform.

So you can help her your just not? Yeah sorry that's a bit mean it's not like she wants it for something frivolous?

I thought you were going to say your sister is irresponsible with money, not just I have
spent loads on my children’s school uniforms.

Well, as long as you’re alright!

I personally would help my sister out. She is going back to work because finances are tight. Why not give her a leg up?

I would have given it to her. How unkind.

I need to see a breakdown of this £2000 please

Does it have to come out of your school uniform budget? Can’t you give her the money in lieu of her birthday present?