Aibu to send my son to school in non uniform

[FastMintSheep]

My ds is due to start secondary school in September he is going into year 7 I’m on benefits at the moment due to anxiety and depression after leaving a 18 year abusive relationship I have four other children who are in college and one ds works and is going into the army in November hopefully,as you can imagine I have around 73 pounds a month left after rent bills shopping etc is paid I am hoping to get back into work soon but at the moment my main priority is myself and my dc mental health,So as mentioned my youngest ds in due to start secondary school the uniform will cost around 200 pounds he also will need a winter coat,I have applied to the council where I live but they said they are running extremely low on second hand uniform and don’t have any of the uniform my son needs they were kind enough to give me a pair of trousers and 2 shirts as that’s all they had ,I have applied directly to the school but have heard nothing back would I be unreasonable to just send him in the trousers and the shirt and maybe a plain black jumper?would I get into trouble for this or would my son?I have looked on fb but there’s nothing I don’t no what else to do I also don’t know how to approach the subject with my son he has severe social anxiety and I’m worried he might try and refuse school I honestly feel like such a failure.

Absolutely go into school on Inset day and speak to them if you haven'tbeen able to sort it out on local FB. They will have second hand uniform.

Defintely ask on FB and if the school has a FB page. I’m about to list a huge amount of uniform to give as my youngest of 3 has finished year 11. I guarantee it will all go really quickly. This is a state school with a very affluent cohort. Nobody has any qualms at all about hand me downs, and people often post asking for specific bits, so defintely don’t worry about not buying new. I think #3 managed a new jumper and DD’s skirts are now on their 4th owners, she was the second one

Happy to send money for shoes if you PM me.

Chin up Mama!!!

We are all honored that you've chosen this post for today's random act of awfulness. Now get out.

As someone who has worked in the state eduction system for 20 years, I can’t tell you how much I disagree with this. I used to work at a school which had frequent non uniform days and I can’t tell you how uncomfortable and upsetting it was to see the inequalities which were exposed on those occasions. My current school does not have any non uniform days for this reason and supports any families who need help with uniform. If we notice any children with ill fitting or unclean uniform we will intervene discretely. Phones are banned now and other items like shoes, bags and hair which you mention are much more limited in what they can indicate in terms of wealth and status.

OP you have received some great advice on here in terms of the practicalities of who to contact and when. Good luck with sourcing uniform and I’m sure your dc will thrive.

School will be open for results day so worth popping in then. In my school the Friends cupboard is full of donated uniform plus there is a dedicated FB page for second hand uniform. If you are able too moving forward volunteer to help out at uniform sales to get first dibs.

Sweet jesus, what the hell has future success got you do with an obviously caring mum who needs a helping hand? The judgement on some of these posts this morning is awful.

Op don’t ever feel ashamed for asking for help. There are more people in this world that will help than judge.
im glad you are sorted. It’s crazy how the price of shoes have increased as well.
My kids are at a private school but I can tell you that almost everyone does second hand uniforms. We have a culture of donating before summer and before winter starts so all kids are kitted out for the season.
And all uniform is almost free too. I buy blazers brand new but it will last 2 years maybe 3 and I get a spare from the uniform shop. Our uniform is logos so other than shirt and trousers everything else is specific. But everyone donates and keeps it in good condition to do so.
The kids also donate football shoes and everything is cleaned and in good condition too. Definitely check if there’s a second hand shop and find out from school if they offer some help towards uniforms too.

Also he will be different from all the other children and feel humiliated. Apply for a crisis loan from UC, ask other family members to help, check out charity shops who often have new uniform, ask on local social media groups for anyone selling off school uniform for thst school . His school will reply soon probably all on summer holiday break.

The reason being poverty??

Op ignore twats who berate you for not working, they have no idea what your going through x

Hello everyone

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WTF? Christ.