Teen daughter has come out gay

[nowhatx]

My teen daughter has told me she’s gay. I’ve told her I love her whatever she is and we’ve had a cuddle. I’ve had a cry on my own. I don’t know why????? She’s 15

is there anything I need to do or nothing I’m just a bit taken back and nobody to talk to x

Sounds good she knows whomis she already and confident enough to be herself

All she needs is to feel accepted unconditionally from you

Exactly. I'm embarrassed for @WerewolfOfLoudon (as well as a couple of other posters!) Honestly, some of the comments coming out on this thread from a small handful of posters are mind boggling, and utter nonsense of course.

This 💜

I think you did what you should do . I also think it’s normal to have a little cry because we know they will have it a bit harder than most and I think that’s why parents worry . You just keep on doing what you are doing . Oh and don’t be surprised if she changes her mind down the line my step son came out as gay same age and is now heterosexual at 20 🤷🏻‍♀️

My daughter is gay, she has a wonderful girlfriend and if she's happy I'm happy is the long and short of it. For my family and all her friends it's not remotely an issue but I know not everybody is like that.

My daughter is well aware she may face prejudice and is careful when she unfortunately feels she needs to be, but day to day life is just living life.

She never 'came out' just simply brought her girlfriend over for lunch, no biggie.

I will admit, I don't really understand your tears but your feelings are yours to work out and I'm sure you will. I wear my rainbow pin happily and I've attended Pride celebrations for years before I even had my.girl.

Parents will worry about their kids every situation, it's what we do but who my daughter fancies is not a worry if the relationship is kind, happy and loving.

Hey OP. Woman who is happily married to a woman here. Please know that as an adult, knowing what I know now - yes, homophobia does exist but so does male violence against women. Obviously your mileage may vary depending on where you live in the world, and how your daughter presents, and women can be abusive too, but I honestly think I’ve come out on top in life by having the privilege of being same-sex attracted. It’s ok that you’ve had a cry and that you might be worried, those things are normal. But let your daughter know you love and accept her, keep channels of communication open and I’m sure it will all be fine!

With quite a few teens its just following the fashion.

🙄

Because it's not necessarily an easy path in life.

British homophobic saying its not right for gay people to have children and that they will be mentally harmed

You don't need to do anything other than you'd normally do regardless of sexuality - be there for her if and when she needs her mum!

It's good too that you've the kind of relationship where she told you, so kudos to you both. You'll all be ok.

Jesus Christ.
2026 and we still get this shit.

Oh goodness, I had no idea that teens in 2026 still had to ‘come out’ to parents. In the 90s I never had to let my dad know that I was a straight woman who fancied boys. Why should gay people have to discuss their preferences with family members when straight people avoid this cringe experience? Gay DS didn’t come out - he just brought a boy home on the assumption that we got it. We did.

Just wanted to add my agreement to the many brilliant posters who have said good things on this thread (thank you all), I started writing their names down, but so many have said the same things I think, and more eloquently, that my post would have been too long. I hope you have been comforted by them, and even guided by them. My daughter (one of 5 DC) came out as lesbian about the same age, and all has been fine, has had a couple of lovely partners, may or may not have kids, has had no issues at work. Don't worry about the tears, when your child tells you some news, we sometimes have tears, regardless of the news, regardless of the subject, sometimes it is tears just to know you were trusted and loved enough to be the one told. It's all good XXXX

people are mad! if a person doesn’t want their child to be gay, it doesn’t make them homophobic!!!
OP you had a cry… i would too! You expect your child to have a normal relationship with a man, have kids and so on. So, it will be in a way mourning that version of your daughter’s life.
My niece, came out as lesbian and although it was a shock at first, we have all accepted it and are fine with it.

My stepdaughter came out as Trans a few years back. Heartbreaking and disappointing, particularly for her mum, but as long as 'he's' happy, that's all that counts for us in the end...

Why was it a shock to find out your niece is a lesbian?

If any of my teens came out as gay I’d be shocked. No issue. But sometimes you know and sometimes you don’t. You’re being disingenuous.

I feel that this is a different sort of coming out. My DS is gay but not trans, so isn’t looking at hormone treatment or surgery. He’s not rejecting his birth identity. There is a lot more to consider with a trans child than with a gay child.

My daughter came out as gay when she was 18. Honestly if I had scrutinised the signs I would maybe have picked it up earlier. Six years down the road (she is still with the same partner and we are all happy for them) .

Not deliberately disingenuous but I accept that it must be harder to tell with some teens than with others. They tend to drop heavy hints in their selection of cultural material, particularly music.

I always make a point of saying girlfriend or boyfriend around my ds. He’s now at the point where he’s rolling his eyes at me!

I would assume he was interested in girls and you could knock me over with a feather if he turned out to be gay. But he’s very aware I accept him whatever. But yeah, I’m allowed a moment of surprise.

I'm embarrassed for you bringing up grand children in reference to a 15 year old child in the first place. Women, gay or straight, aren't breeding machines.