AIBU to worry about a growing political divide in marriage?

[Whatsahappening]

Changed accounts
Is there anyone else dealing with real political divide in their marriage?
I don’t want to go into all the back story but I have a husband who seems so fixated on migrants and drifting into right wing political views that I couldn’t be any further from.

I’m not a complete lefty but I focus solely on the things that matter more so (I feel) what is impacting women’s rights, my children’s upbringing and I am a huge empath and have really struggled with the current world events such as the genocide(s) happening within the world and genuinely fall to bits about it but the only passion I see from my husband is how enraged he gets around the ’impact’ the migrants have coming in this country - Which my view as a woman, is we have a far bigger problems within our own societies, within our own men/people in this country committing horrendous crimes, especially against women and children, yet not a smidge I hear around this!
There’s so much I could share on the matter but I fear it could be counterproductive.

I genuinely love my husband and we have had battle after battle recently.. I am insisting on couples therapy as we are arguing about this stuff in front of our children but I really need help from those going / been through this and can help with a resolution?

I know he has his own mind and should steer how he chooses but I need to figure a way that I won’t put so much emotion into this, that it could really pull on my marriage.

Thanks!

I know who poses a threat to me and I know who doesn't.

Umm… You must be super human, immortal, all knowing, the all seeing eye.

What a gift.

Anyway @Whatsahappening interesting first post.

Much like you thinking you know your DH's mind.

😉… Anymore?

It is very difficult travelling from countries with civil wars, non functioning governments, oppressive states etc as there may be total chaos, no system for eg registering births, issuing passports ( particularly for people opposed to the current repressive government/army/ regime etc eg Eritrea, Sudan, Afghanistan, Iran. Ukraine etc.) Think how difficult it was to escape Nazi Germany WW2 yet then too people here were loth to accept Jews as refugees even though refusals meant certain death in a concentration camp.

It makes sense to send on a less vulnerable person eg a father, a son, to try and arrange a safe place for daughters, wives, children etc. Many years ago a friend's family escaped massacres in Armenia. Their father was sent on to forge a pathway ( they couldn't get official papers).

Ironically far from refugees being 'unlike us' they are often exactly like us and are fleeing from repressive countries. If they were at one with the repressive Government of eg Afghanistan etc they would stay there. They certainly would not be sending their daughters through hostile territory until they could ensure their safety. We also have a responsibility for those people who opposed the current Government in eg Afghanistan and helped support our armies.

We are fortunate that most of us have little experience of such horrors.

For the sake of accuracy, GI took hold and women lost single sex spaces under a Conservative government. There's only the Greens on the left pushing to ignore the SCJ. The most left you can get, The British Communist Party have committed to sex based rights from the get go.
Women's rights are almost always an after thought when men want something different. And rights we have won can be taken from us. Single sex spaces being a good example.

@ElizaMulvil "It makes sense to send on a less vulnerable person eg a father, a son, to try and arrange a safe place for daughters, wives, children etc."

And then when they get here some of them sexually assault our women and girls because they don't respect our laws and have a bad attitude to women. That's a great way of making themselves popular and welcomed.

I can't believe people still buy that crock about sending the men here first.

There’s little point trying to make rational points to people who have been brainwashed by GBeebies, X, Tik Tok and the like where they get their ‘real’ news untainted by bias. I am probably in a small minority of British people who have actually met and spent time with former asylum seekers. Those I met were unfailing polite, kind, generous and hardworking. They were nothing like I was expecting. Sure, it’s anecdata, but I found the experience truly eye opening.

Can you not see how patronising and just fucking unuseful this is. I’m sorry if you don’t. Your thinking must be muddled.

😆 🤣 parody at its finest

”AI Overview”

Strange comment - I’m not sure you know what that word means!

“Accompanying woman to meet their needs”

😳

If you're going to continue to think you're better than everyone else, at least try and be original. I mean GBeebies. It's something a young teenager would say. Cringeworthy of epic proportions.

Nothing like focussing on the key points of an argument.

Might surprise you to hear that women are at risk from men from all walks of life including ones born here. In fact, the statistics show that women are most often at risk from their partners, and other men in their lives, and not from strangers.

Your key points, not mine.

Huh? Talk about strawman argument. Rape and murder of women has been illegal for a long time (hundred of years) as have refuges etc (since the 70s) and have nothing to do with the current government. I was querying whether their "plan" will reduce VAWG especially as they're not protecting them from men without a passport from dangerous countries and letting rapists and murderers out of prison early (against the advice of many women's groups) is their current plan. If they can't even get the basics right I am 100% right to be sceptical.

You don’t seem to have any key points 🤷🏼‍♂️, or you’re not able to engage in a discussion. Nothing really to gain from continuing.

Genuinely intrigued to know the age of these commenters constantly utilising the word ‘cringe’… I would simply say, I’m embarrassed for you, of which those using that type of dialogue, I am simply embarrassed for you.

Except I said cringeworthy not cringe.

👍

🤣 There is no definitive difference.