Ariana Grande

[ingonnabealright]

AIBU to think it’s a bit hypocritical that people are protecting her when she’s visibly unwell, saying that commenting on her body is wrong, but people take free reign to comment on plus size women’s bodies?!

I agree with you in that the press and social media think its OK to comment on peoples weight, usually then they are overweight and not in a supportive manner.

There’s a long‑standing pattern

Thin women (especially celebrities) get “concern”, “protectiveness”, “she must be struggling”, “don’t comment on her body”.

Plus‑size women get “she’s unhealthy”, “she’s promoting obesity”, “she should lose weight”, “it’s fair game to discuss”.

It’s not subtle. It’s not new. And it’s absolutely hypocritical.

People pretend they’re being kind when they defend Ariana, but often they’re just reinforcing the idea that thinness = fragile and worthy of protection, while fatness = public property.

About the post in general, and not your comments:

Speculating about Ariana’s health isn’t the answer either. Commenting on anyone’s body, thin or fat, is the issue.... two wrongs don’t make a right! You don’t fix hypocrisy by adding more speculation about someone’s health. We need to stop commenting on women’s bodies full stop.

If someone is genuinely unwell, that’s private medical information, not something strangers diagnose from photos.

If we don’t want people diagnosing plus‑size women from photos, we shouldn’t be diagnosing thin women either.

And as a plus size woman I am sick of people speculating about weight relative to my health, the amount of lectures I get from chain smoking or drug taking slim friends who hold themselves up as beacons of a healthy person! And that is why it shouldn't be a public discussion. You might bite off more than you can chew.

Everyone seems to accept that some people are just naturally thin and have trouble gaining weight, so why can't they accept that some (by no means all, myself included) naturally on the larger side. and it shouldn't be a public discussion.

AG isn’t reading this or any of other SM and MSM comments about her figure. Her life will be sheltered and shielded by people she has selected to be around her. Whether she shows good judgement in this is anyone’s guess. History suggests child stars don’t have a lot of judgement when they grow up.

Most rich, famous and/or busy people are not on social media. They don’t have the time and probably don’t have the inclination. They pay people to read comments and to reply. Really rich people have teams of people doing this and managing their fandom. They also pay for Bot followers. Everything she is posting or saying about herself is carefully curated. It is completely designed to be lapped up by fans and the media.

The latest press release doesn’t actually say she is stopping performing. Just that she won’t be doing a stage show in London. The rest is just a push back on all the concern and negativity about her weight loss. Which has just drawn more attention to it and her video. It’s all a charade.

There is a very broad spectrum of body sizes and shapes that fall within the healthy range.
I think it's generally very rude to comment on people's appearance
But when you have someone in the public eye who is clearly at risk of serious health complications from being either very under or very overweight, it's fine to discuss it. If we don't its being normalised.
Ariana Grande is obviously unwell.

Hear hear!!👋🎯

So well stated.

I was anorexic for a long time. I enjoyed people being concerned for me and telling me I was too thin.

Her family (& management) should be trying to help her. She certainly shouldn’t be on a strenuous world tour. When she is quite clearly very unwell. Joe Public can’t do anything here I’m afraid l, so all this public discussion is not benefitting anyone, certainly not Ariana!

As the Mother of daughters and a former ED sufferer, I am heartbroken that we are in another skinny era.

Its not my place to comment on anyones appearance or body and dont wish to cause distress. I just hope AG is being looked after and getting support and I hope she will be ok.

*rein, not reign.

I don’t like commenting on women’s bodies but there is a difference between being visibly unwell with an eating disorder and obesity, which isn’t an immediate threat that people can see. Women are judged either way.

Yes I was thinking that. What an awful, awful thing to be “associated” with. Maybe it’s affected her more than we can know x

And this is part of the problem, this attitude to body size is creating people who have real body dysmorphia about what a healthy body size is.

As the Mother of daughters and a former ED sufferer, I am heartbroken that we are in another skinny era.

I feel the same way about attitudes having regressed on this front, when progress was being made.

There is way too much casual shaming of obesity in a way that we just couldn't shame other similar issues, and people seem unable to understand how those conversations impact on body image at the other end of the spectrum (not to mention on the people struggling with excess weight): all the shaming, revulsion and condescension only reinforces unhealthy attitudes.

Seems jameela posting about it might have triggered something as she’s pulled out of a festival and is taking time off after her tour

I agree to an extent that we will notice criticism of features we own more as it touches a nerve on a personal level. And I have noticed horrible comments the other side too, Gemma Collins is 1 that stands out as the most disgusting cruel comments I have seen regularly online.

But taking it out of the ever hateful online world and into real life situations where you expect people to conduct themselves better and it is definitely seem as more socially acceptable to comment on slimmer women. In the last office I was in I would often get 'you are too skinny, need to get some burgers down you', when i am eating 'it makes me sick watching you eat', when i am cold in winter 'it's because you are too skinny, need to get some meat on your bones'. The others all laugh. If i had flipped this and told them when they are hot 'it's because you are too big, need to loose some weight', or to eat more salads. No one would think that is a funny joke they can all share at the woman's expense. I would rightfully be pulled up in front of HR for making such comments. These wasn't even women you would think are horrible women, but they genuinely thought it was ok to make those comments and make me feel uncomfortable and self conscious

I feel nothing but sympathy for her, she is clearly struggling however, I think anyone famous opens themselves up to outside opinions it’s part of the job.

'People' do not share a uni-mind

Is this individuals that you know, and can verify that the same people comment on both issues?
Or have you done a spreadsheet on MN users to verify that they are the same people ?

Public commentary on women , what they wear, what they look like, etc etc is ALL part of the problem, and far far worse for celebrities.

It's all intrusive, irrelevant to their talent, role or contribution, boring and misogynist.

I swerve any thread on MN picking over some women's appearance.

But why should they? Why should it be?

IMO we demean ourselves by taking part in it.

I don’t disagree with you, but it is the way of the world. I think everyone deserves humanity and the tabloids and people of social media forget that celebrities are just people.

My child had anorexia. It's the most serious mental health disease with more deaths than any other. It's not really comparable with being overweight. I am concerned for Ariana, we didn't manage to get hold of tickets and I'm glad now. It would really upset me to see her as she is now. I think it's awful she's being made to perform when she's clearly very unwell. It's horrendous.

AG has had an eating disorder for decades. Erivo was a healthy weight before they met. I’m wondering why you think the latter is the bad influence?

Are you sure it's the same people doing both?

@CrypticCluelessits human nature to comment on people in the public eye though. And people do comment on famous men as well. Image is part of the currency for famous people so people will have opinions on it b

Oh, puhleeease...
Social media discourse around AG and other extremely thin women has been awful.
It could be termed 'Ozempic Opprobium' as a lot of Insta threads refer to the 'Ozempic effect', then castigate the female, referencing how awful the women in question looks etc.

I think YABU, really, because it is clear as day to the world how unwell AG is. She is alarmingly unwell.

Had she gained weight rather than lost it, yes, people would assume that rectifying it was under her control but this is not the case, here.

So you can think it unreasonable but it's irrelevant, really. What is relevant is that she clearly needs to go away and have time to herself to heal.

I write this as someone with a thyroid disorder who has been told at different stages of life that I am too fat and too thin. When I was very thin was when I was most unwell (but thanks to an amazing endocrinologist, I got better).

i think she certainly has an ED but I imagine she is seeking help.

for some reason people seem to assume if you don’t return to a size 6 in 3 days you’re not getting help.

im sure she is getting help. She’s probably always had it. It’s not a quick recovery though, even with “help” she may never recover.

pretending she doesn’t have an ED is fucking mental though.

All the news reports bring in money. Any show or film she's in attracts far more interest, reports, comments and revenue because of this. It's making a lot of people money for her to continue being told 'it's fine, look, see the number of hits your video is getting, look at these offers, they wouldn't be interested without this, they want the package as you are'.

It's a niche she has filled (ironically enough) through the eating disorder - the whole look relies upon her not getting better.

The only time it might stop is if it is no longer possible to get insurance and the offers stop coming in because of the cost that somebody dying mid run or mid filming can represent - because the money stops rolling in for the machine. That and if parents actually prevent their little children from seeing/buying/funding the massive income stream.

At least people openly saying it makes it more likely that she'll have no choice but to accept treatment because the others who make money out of her image won't want to lose that, whereas 'Don't be mean, bet you're 20 stone and jealous, how dare you comment, let's all pretend it's not happening for profit' is likely to end up with little girls putting flowers on a shrine somewhere and wishing they could look like her when they grow up.