I want to tell daughter in law to stop posing on photos

[woopdedoodle]

I know I'm being unreasonable, I know it's harmless, I know it's none of my business.

But if I see another family holiday picture where its all best profile, drinky with pinky cocked over her straw sunglasses tilted look at my boobs again I'll scream.

Or I can vent here and you can all talk me down before I say something everyone will regret.

I mean just relax, play with the kids, have fun .

The fact I was rung on day one of the school holiday cause she couldn't deal with them might be colouring my attitude to all the time spent styling, posing and collating perfect pictures must be taking. But I'm old school and my kids weren't accessories.

I do feel better now, thank you for listening.

posing with one leg in front on tip toes

I can't work out what this looks like but it sounds unstable haha

Who knows the answers to your questions. Perhaps this woman does have negatives in her life which we would sympathise with.

But that doesn't detract from how worrying it is that so many people are absolutely fixated on looking at photos of themselves and are absolutely obsessed with their appearance. And have been groomed into thinking they are only good enough if they look like the people they see on social media

Oh that’s sad!

Go to any public place and you will see a lot of people of the same generation posing, making TikTok’s, retaking photos over and over again to look perfect. It isn’t assumption, it’s people lived experiences. It doesn’t mean it is every single person. It’s pretty sad how people no longer live in the moment.

Block her on Instagram

Exactly!

I'm sorry, I have absolutely zero idea what this means -

drinky with pinky cocked over her straw sunglasses tilted look at my boobs

I do agree though. I hate posers. It only seemed to start when Facebook took off in the mid-2000s. No one did this stuff before that. People just used to smile. What a novelty!

The ones who kick one leg out behind them though, trying to look all coy, are the ones who really piss me off.

Perhaps the issue is how OP is fixating on looking at photos of her DIL.

Those photos aren't my kind of thing at all, but my god, you sound like a sneering, judgy MIL.

Nope. Try again. I hate having pictures taken of myself, and don't post pictures of DS online. I do have an Instagram account to follow some of my favourite brands/bands/famous people, (and some of my friends) but as they're people like Amy Lee and Jon Mahon I'm not the target audience for the 'everything looks perfect' lot. (Although I was jealous when my friend went to meet some hippos. )

I agree, although the generalisations about young people doing it are tedious. My daughters don't do this and I haven't seen their friends do it. However a few people jumped to mind that are my age (fifties)
It's tedious, unnatural and takes any spontaneity out of photos.

People criticising OP are surely being deliberately unkind. She was pointing out the wholesome perfect world her DIL is presenting online versus her inability to cope with day one of the school holidays.
Doesn't make her a bad mother in law, just a mother in law who is sighing and rolling her eyes to herself surely.

She's 40, not my daughter, my step son, he's in the pictures making sandcastles, swimming in the sea with the kids, etc etc.

And yesI know don't be a doormat, but that's easier said than down when you love the kids.

She shouldn't really be calling you for help on day 1 of the holidays unless she has been called into work for an emergency.

The posing behaviour is often seen in teenagers and younger 20 somethings.
If seen older it feels to me like she is struggling - she is looking for affirmation from people online as she hasn't developed an internal sense of positive worth and/or isn't getting positive support at home - so your son might need to look at the role he is playing in all of this

Wow you really don’t like her do you, what a disparaging petty little post. How embarassing for you,

Blimey, don’t know what you’ve been reading but the loathing for MIL’s on Mumsnet is bonkers!

And I can guarantee, @woopdedoodle , you won’t be the only person in the family thinking the same. But well done for venting silently 🤣.

Seems a pretty innocuous thing to get wound up about 🤷‍♀️ sounds like you just don't like her and want to bitch about her! Not nice.

@woopdedoodle you sound (as do others) very jealous and archaic and you need a bigger world …or some hobbies to focus on.

It’s a pose. Completely harmless. In the grand scheme of things it literally doing nothing negative to the world.

If you want to tell her and to not look after your grandchildren, go for it. If I was her, I’d probably limit contact between you all afterwards

Poor woman - how is her posing for photos affecting you in any way at all?
Your sneery judgemental attitude is oozing from your description of her.

Bingo!

Mean girls don’t grow up, they just get older

Can’t be that young if she’s a mother to school age children?
You clearly dont live in the same area as me!!
My best friends daughter has 4 kids, two of which are at primary and she is 23 and extremely glam.
She isnt an exception around here!!!

I have a nephew who used to irritate me in photos. He was always sticking his tongue out and gurning. He finally gave that up when he was 38.

And MIL’s like the OP are why.

Going by Mumsnet you could equally say “why do so many DILs love to be so disparaging about the woman who gave birth to and brought up the man they fell in love with?”

So its all young people, except your darling DC’s of course

Not embarrassing at all for the OP; the idiot is embarrassing herself.

You know you can’t actually say anything don’t you?

Better to just vent here. Yes. It’s absolutely CRINGE