To find "holidays" absolutely insanely stressful

[Muddlemummy]

I know everyone seems to joke " ha ha ha I need another holiday to get over the family holiday" but feeling totally burnt out and ashamed at how awful I found 3 nights away. Tried everything to prepare and it's less than 3hours drive, self catering house so got fridge, bedrooms etc, Suffolk so basic beach, castles, parks etc. nothing ott.

Got 3 and 5 year old and things seem to be getting worse not better each time we go away. Not sure I am looking for advice but just desperate to unload.

Trying not to compare and despair but feel so awful at how draining it was despite hands on husband. Usual story of mental load making my brain explode

Worst thing is the holiday washing! Not too bad in cottages with a washer, but hotel prices for laundry are huge and once your back it’s doing all that lot.

Self catering with young kids means the only thing that changes is the view from the kitchen sink.

We’ve always self catered and I’ve never found this! We self cater so that we have seperate bedrooms and living area, but that doesn’t actually mean we cook every meal (or even close). We tend to buy pastries/fruit/yoghurt for breakfast, and bread/cheeses/salads etc in case we have another meal at home, but otherwise we eat out.

It does get easier OP. When mine were that little though we did caravan holidays by the coast which seemed to work better.

I do easy breakfast only in the accommodation (pastries, cereal, toast, tea, coffe, juice), all other meals are out and about or bought in ready made (pizza, pasta and sauce). Maybe a takeaway one evening. Must have a dishwasher.

What did you find the most hard?

There is nothing wrong with you at all. I only have one and felt the same way in the early years. It’s really hard. I thought staying local would be easier too but it wasn’t. By age 6 going abroad on half board was definitely easier. Still not fully relaxing though. A few more years on now and everything is easier where ever we are. Hang in there and know that what you are feeling is normal.

You neeed a week or 10 days. You cant relax over 3 days, the first day is getting there, then as soon as you know it you're prepping and packing to come back again

I would find that stressful without kids even.

This is exactly what I say!! Like I might take them camping begrudgingly for the experience when they’re slightly older (or just DH?) but an annual 2 week holiday to stay in some hovel instead of my nice house? No thanks.

I agree it's the ages of your kids. Ours are 10 and 12 now so more relaxing. Camping is my idea of hell and I wouldn't even consider it, and I find the preparing for holidays very stressful, especially
as we have our own business so we still have to be available for work when we are away. We go to quite luxurious SC accommodation if we holiday in this country, however the only 'catering' we do is heating up a takeaway, using the toaster and making breakfast. We tend to eat out most days. If you are cooking I've found it useful to get a shopping delivery organised for just after we arrive. I also think 3 nights is too short, it's virtually the same amount of stress beforehand and planning as going for a week so you don't really relax before you're coming home. And to be honest if the weather is crap it will make the holiday crap for me, I think all this 'put wellies on and go for a walk in the rain it's still fun' is people lying or trying to convince themselves. Laying on the beach in the sunshine is fun! The types of things you do with kids your age also bores me to tears, so again not a holiday - zoos, farms, and lay areas, museums. I want to walk on the beach, on the cliff tops, go for long bike rides, go to coffee shops, sit and read my book outside in the sun etc

True. Too short a break to settle. You only begin to exhale after 3 days

No, why is it different?

Yeah, this is why I took mine to Butlins so much when they were little. It was the only place they didn't drive me insane and I could actually relax. We've been about five or six times 🤣

I don't know how a holiday can be stressful.... somewhere new, culture, great sights, relaxation, lovely food, someone else making your bed every day, new things to learn and see, no work ir biring chores, total relaxation.....How hard can it be?

We took our three to Majorca,self catering for 2weeks every year. Ate out in the evening,buffet lunch and cereal and fresh bread at breakfast. We had a fabulous time and such lovely memories.
We take our grandchildren now to the same place and loving it all over again.

You did note it was 3 days self catering in the UK?

tbh if you’ve never bern on a holiday where somebody got an infectious disease/food poisoning/injured their back/got prickly heat/developed a sand phobia etc etc etc you’re also pretty lucky.

except that OPs holiday was in the same country just a few hours from home where she had to make the food and beds herself..

We just had a really relaxing self catering break in the lakes. The secret, the kids are grown up and dint come! You’ll get there and have relaxing holidays again.

We shared ....I felt safer us all being together....I didn't want a Maddie McCaan situation. We have fond memories of us all together chatting and laughing in the same large family room :)
Each to their own. Everyone's different

I think implying that I am putting my children at risk of being abducted because we choose stay in a villa with separate bedrooms is a bit shitty to be honest!

wait what, booking a suite with separate bedrooms is now 'high risk of abduction' activity? No riskier than having kids sleeping in separate bedrooms at home, surely.

Older teens in their own room is fine, but little ones are generally in with you. Probably why people prefer holiday cottages as you can have your own rooms. With hotels it’s more money to have two rooms. Depends on the budget.

Sorry I wasn't implying that - I didn't realise you meant a villa/holiday home. I just mean in hotels I preferred a family room when the kids were little.

I agree with this...but it seems to be a classic MN quote to come out with "same shit different location" etc Etc

Our kids are 8 and 5 and we've done every type of holiday imaginable with them since they were each 7-10mths old.
We've done long haul, short haul, European road trips, beach holidays, city breaks, self catering, All inclusive, theme parks, and last year a huge Interrailing Trip backpacking around Europe. The 5 yr old will have been to 20 countries by next year!
There is nothing in the world I'd rather do than travel all together as a family. Makes our hugely stressful jobs worthwhile.
We're not particularly well off either, all done on a budget 😊

The younger kids are the easiest on holiday imo. Teenagers are so difficult. Everything is boring, babyish or embarrassing to them. Its just not a holiday when youre looking after (feeding/entertaining) others. Ive just been away self catering with my 13 year old who pretty much didnt want to do anything. Didnt like the beach- hates sand now apparently. Doesnt like the fair rides as theyre too baby….oh beam me up 🙄

true. but most of the replies seemed to be saying that self catering could never be a holiday and hotels/AI were the only way to go.

We have self-catered in the UK too and had some nice holidays. But that's not what tends to come to mind when I think of holidays generally.

Now I don't think that lying on the beach in the sunshine is particularly fun!

We're all different...

The list of the stuff you add later sounds much more fun however.